If you are in midlife and are afraid of having a crisis -- or are beginning to be afraid that you might -- what can you do? There are many potential solutions. Seek professional coaching or counseling Sometimes all we need to get through what looks like a 'crisis' in our lives, is have someone deeply listen to us.
Skilled therapists and often a great life coach - especially one with a spiritual approach, can be there for you in a way that you can hear your own answers. Therapy no longer has the stigma it once did and it doesn't have to last forever. In fact, if your therapist seems to be 'keeping you' in therapy, MOVE ON. Unless you have had serious trauma in your childhood, you can be helped just by knowing someone else out there is witnessing your life. Notice your reactions and see if you are over-reacting Just taking the time to notice and acknowledge that you are reacting can be enough to change the course of your life.
There is a difference between reaction and response. If you find yourself flying off the handle, or drinking excessively, or spending more money than you have or getting into drugs or sexual addictions, you may be running from something in your life rather than facing it.
Midlife is an opportunity to really come to terms with your life and if you are avoiding the deeper questions, you are headed for trouble. Even a good friend can often be a great sounding board to explore your new feelings.
Approach midlife thoughtfully. Look back to where you've been. Have you gotten through touch times before? I bet you have. We all have. Don't discount the value of your maturity and experience. You are most likely better equipped than ever to cope effectively with life's difficulties.
Reassess your goals and dreams. Are some of those dreams actually a hold over from your teen years? If you haven't been practicing for sometime already, you are probably not going to make the Olympics at the age of 35. Go and root for someone who can. And, be sure to look for some things that you CAN do now. It's not too late to take up a musical instrument, for example, or to go back to school to get a degree. I'm not one for telling people to be realistic, because I believe we are capable of far more than we ever imagine, but it's important to 'know when to hold them, know when to fold them.' This is a sign of maturity in itself.
Find freedom in aging. When you learn to be accepting of mortality, (really IMMORTALITY!), you'll start to truly enjoy the aging process. It's not over until it is over. So, stop acting as if life has ended. Maybe some of the things you used to do are not part of your life any more, but, I guarantee that if you put your mind and heart into it, you'll find things to be and do that you never could before. While science has come up with ways we can live healthier, longer, no one has found the fountain of youth, Make today count. You can think of midlife as an end or as a beginning. It startled me to realize that I still potentially have one third of a life to still live. If I look back to the first 30 years of my life, for example, I hardly recognize or remember myself. There's a whole new world out there and I'm excited about the possibilities that are open to me. Are you?
I would like to offer a support system for all of us to find our own wisdom in Midlife. In fact, I'm all about creating a new Midlife paradigm and let go of the old ideas that it has to be a crisis. Will you join me? When you subscribe to my free Reinvent Midlife newsletter, you'll receive instant access to a special report called, "7 Secrets for Reinventing Midlife from the Inside-Out". Go now to http://www.reinventmidlife.com
From Dr. Toni LaMotta, The Midlife Mentor, Inspirational Keynote Speaker, Best-Selling Author of "What You REALLY Want, Wants You"