Teach Your Children What They Will Never Learn in School

By Debbie Glade


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We attend school from ages 5 through 18, though many of us remain students way beyond those years. With all that schooling (at least 2340 days!), what could possibly be missing from our education? The answer is . . . A LOT!

Years ago, I realized from personal experience that many of the most important life skills I needed were not taught to me in school. Now that I am a children’s book author, who visits elementary and middle schools on a regular basis, I see firsthand what is lacking in our educational system. And it doesn’t matter how excellent a school’s academic program is, whether public or private, there are just some lessons that must be taught or at least supported at home. Here are my top five:

1. Interpersonal Skills
Interacting with others and experiencing conflicts in every day life from an early age do teach us some people skills. But why don’t schools offer courses about communicating with others and conflict resolution? Is there anything more important to success in life, business and marriage than getting along with others and knowing how to properly deal with difficult people? I don’t think so. But other than being reprimanded for fighting or saying something cruel to another student, children don’t really master the tricks of getting along with people while at school. So they need to learn these skills at home. Start by taking a look at your own relationships. Pass your wisdom onto your kids. If they are experiencing relationship challenges at school, role-playing at home may help them learn to resolve their situation peacefully. Obviously, significant bullying problems or safety issues require both parental and school administration involvement.

2. Career Counseling
Schools will teach your children to read and write, but they will not teach them what to do with what they know. Why don’t schools have speakers from all different fields talk to students about what they do for a living, starting with elementary school? It wouldn’t be that difficult, as they can start with the parents of the students and community leaders. Your children will need your guidance to explore careers, college options and majors. But don’t wait until they are in high school. Encourage them to interact with family members, friends and your colleagues, who can tell them about what they do for a living and the type of education or training that is involved. Pay attention to your children’s strengths starting in elementary school, and learn together about potential careers that will suit them best.

3. Money Management
Teaching our kids to add and subtract is just one of many steps needed to prepare them for money management responsibilities. Schools don’t seem to take this any further. And unless your child gets a business degree, that subject won’t even be taught in college. If your kids are used to asking you for (and open-handedly receiving) money, for the things they need and want, they certainly have little or no idea how money is managed. Your children will learn this life lesson best from you. If you are not the type of money manager you wish for your children to be, share your mistakes with them. Talk about the consequences of overspending. Show them how to use and balance a check book, and talk to them about budgets. You may even want to give them a simple budget with a limited amount of money, so they can experience the reality of money management!

5. Nutrition and Fitness
It is alarming to me that many American schools no longer offer Physical Education classes. My daughter is a junior in high school and has only had one semester of P.E. in high school and one class in her life – Health – that had one short chapter about nutrition. From what I have been told by various doctors, nutrition is not even an integral part of getting most medical degrees in our universities! Our nation’s children are getting fatter, and they are getting diseases that used to be seen only in adults. Discussion about the negative consequences of living sedentary lives and eating high fat foods are everywhere, but apparently not enough people are listening. Teach your kids by example. Exercise on a regular basis, and make sure they do the same. Make healthy food choices at home, and limit sugar and junk for everyone in the family. Teach them how to cook and eat healthy. If this means making changes for yourself, now is the perfect time. The younger your children are, the easier it is to instill in them a healthy lifestyle. But don’t expect them to eat right or exercise if you don’t.

5. Manners
By the time a child is in kindergarten, he or she should already have basic manners down pat, like saying, ‘Please,” and Thank You.” But my experience as an entrepreneur, is that many adults are lacking in manners. It is actually shocking that many times I am not thanked for going above and beyond the call of duty. Just the sheer lack of response I have experienced from others as a professional is proof that business etiquette is in dire need of a transformation. Teach your kids to express gratitude and write thank you notes, and show them by example, the art of treating others fairly and kindly. If they grow up in a compassionate environment, they too will give a lending hand without being asked to do so. Whatever they do in their lives, they’ll be much more successful.

We cannot expect to send our children off to school every day and believe their education will be complete by the time they graduate from high school or college. As parents, we need to acknowledge that we are the most influential teachers they will ever have. And if we do our jobs well, our children will have all the tools they need to succeed in life and make the world a better place.

Debbie Glade is the publisher at Smart Poodle Publishing and the author of the picture book/CD - The Travel Adventures of Lilly P Badilly: Costa Rica. She appears in schools with her “Learn, Laugh and Love to Read with Lilly Badilly” Program, which includes an interactive geography game. She also hosts an online video Geography Q & A - “Ask Lilly Badilly All About the World,” and blogs at smartpoodlepublishing.com/blog. Debbie is the Geography Awareness Editor at WanderingEducators.com and has contributed articles about parenting to education.com and other sites.