The concept of unconditional love is often misunderstood and misapplied in relationship. Too often, people believe that unconditional love means accepting the unacceptable. Unconditional love applied in this manner facilitates an imbalance in relationship thereby causing a true lack of connectedness and intimacy. In this scenario, one person is the abuser/user and the other the victim/people pleaser.
Unconditional love is acceptance and forgiveness. It is not accepting unacceptable behavior. Forgiveness is a compassionate understanding of self and others struggle for self-love. Though unconditional love says: "I love you for all of who you are and all of who you are striving to become". It also says "I forgive you for your transgressions in your struggle to become. I love you and want to be with you, but in order to "be" with me, you must amend the behavior which prevents true connection".
Healthy relationship is a mutually expansive dynamic interplay and not a power-over dynamic. It takes both people in the relationship to understand the right use of unconditional love. That it is about compassion, love, forgiveness and acceptance; but not an invitation to abuse power believing that no matter what the behavior, one will continue to be embraced in relationship with their partner without having to amend the behavior that is being forgiven.
Linda Darro Zander is a Life Coach teaching people how to work with the natural laws of the Universe to manifest sustainable abundance in all areas of their lives. She has successfully worked with people to overcome their fears, phobias and self-limiting belief patterns empowering them to acieve their most sacred goals. You may contact her at: firstname.lastname@example.org