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Valentines For Missing Persons
By
Benjamin Devey |
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If you're single, Valentines might feel like a day of missing out. If you're between love, on the rocks — or if Cupid seems to have lost your forwarding address — Valentines may seem more like a day of vexing, instead of an occasion for romance.
May I suggest a thought or two?
Our ideas of romance have conformed over the years to the notion of a one-and-only true love. It is depicted on TV, and in songs, books, and movies. It's embedded in our sub-conscious thoughts. For some people, the evidence looks like a discard pile of past relationships. Others may feel a distant longing for the one that never was. So much attention is focused on this idea, that even married couples may wonder if they are right for each other; when they ought to be nurturing their love for each other, allowing their romance to blossom as eternal summer.
The problem with one-and-only true love is that it is focused on an ideal image of a future partner, full of positive traits, without vices and fictional. The ideal man, or woman, doesn't exist. To find him or her would be a futile, life-long undertaking.
Yet there is a part of ideal love that is very real. It is the inspiration that two people can love each other enough to overlook faults, see the good in each other, and allow their eternal love for each other to infinitely grow. I'm sure that this is what we all really hope to find.
You're probably thinking, I already know that. But it just isn't what I'm finding. Everyone is at a different point in his or her life. For some, there is real pain in wondering if they will ever know lasting love. If we haven't found true love yet, it doesn't mean that we never will. We can always hold out the hope. The challenge, in the mean time, is living life to the fullest.
Romance Now
Another misperception of our culture is the idea that romance is a special attraction between two people. Romance can be a way of life. It doesn't have to be tied into an unattainable love with a soul mate. We can find romance in an inspiration, a thought or idea, a moment, a scene. Romance is a way of looking at our world with awe — of breathing in the wonder of the now.
Love is a power. Love for others can be unlimited. You don't have to have someone special to make a special moment for someone in your life. Take the time to show appreciation now for a person who means something to you. Family and friends are fair game for kind gestures. But there's nothing preventing you from doing something nice for a stranger or removed acquaintance. Acts of kindness bless both the receiver and the giver. Make today an occasion, every day.
Author's Bio
Benjamin Devey hosts www.LearningLove.com and publishes insights on love relationships in the monthly newsletter, "Learning Love & Life," available on the website.
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