It seems this colloquial saying, “You Can Put Lipstick On A Pig, But It's Still A Pig”, is making the rounds - and causing quite a row - in the current U.S. presidential campaigns. According to the “Urban Dictionary”, this phrase is slang for when someone tries to dress something up to make it appear to be better than it really is.
Yes, it is true. No matter whether it is lipstick, perfume or a tuxedo, a pig is still a pig. Now, before the animal rights people start e-mailing me let me go on record that - I have nothing at all against pigs!
However, it did stimulate me to think about the way that people communicate. You see, phenomenally successful people work constantly on their “people skills”. In the popular motivation and success system, The Power of Concentration, the author wrote that…
“The first, and most critical, area is the relationships you have with others as well as what and how you COMMUNICATE in those relationships.”
The manner in which you communicate, not only
#1) what you say, that is, your choice of words,
#2) how you say it, and
#3) the situation or circumstance in which you communicate,
can either make you (more) successful OR make you appear or perceived to be just like the “poor pig” in our opening example - all dressed up to look better than it is!
And, with that in mind, here is the key takeaway of my motivational story. Be careful of what I call “the colorful metaphors”. You may also know them as the dreaded “four-letter words!
For example, last week I met a potential client, who I will call "Karen" who despite her current status in life injected these “colorful metaphors” quite liberally in the conversation. Now, I’m not talking about “shucks” or “darn” as examples, I’m talking about the “queen mother” of all four-letter words among others. Yes, it was the nuclear “F-bomb”!
The truth is, without quality communication with the people that you relate to on a daily basis, whether they are at your place of business, in your personal life or at the shopping mall, you can not attract the building blocks that lead to success.
Poor communication, especially when using "colorful metaphors and four-letter words", affects the way others perceive, understand and react to you. The people who communicate best are the ones that are the most successful. Look at any of the successful people that you know and study the way that they communicate. You will quickly see through their words, body language and tonality their formula for success. You will also notice that they listen more than they talk. When it is time for them to talk, they ensure that they TAKE THE RESPONSIBILITY for the other party to understand what they are saying.
And, it does not matter what your current situation or circumstance is. Whether you are on the path to success or already believe you are successful. It does not matter if you already have a high-level of financial comfort, a college or university education, an expensive watch, luxury car or you or your spouse own a business. The cold, hard truth is that the person who does not take the responsibility for the words they choose presents him / herself as unprofessional, lacking self control and self discipline. They will quickly and positively lose the respect of the people they deal with.
Period.
Be aware and watch these simple, yet critical, interpersonal skills every day as they will take you far along your path to success. Be careful not to take the “Ready, Fire, Aim” approach in communicating with others. Manage your thoughts by developing your self control and self mastery. There is a Chinese Proverb that reads, “A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.” Practice everyday, and soon you will be making a powerful and positive impression, (without lipstick or a tuxedo), no matter where you are on your quest for personal development, success or self improvement.
Copyright 2008 by Keith A. Shaw and Mind Body Spirit Central.com, LLC.
Keith A. Shaw, is the President and Owner of Shaw's Karate Institute, LLC http://www.856karate.com and MindBodySpiritCentral, LLC and is an authority on motivation, success, self improvement, fitness and wellness. Keith is a 3rd-degree black belt and has a strong passion for the martial arts as a means to help children, woman and men to achieve black belt excellence in anything they want to accomplish in life. His books and DVDs are available at http://www.www.cafepress.com/MBSCentral. He is the author of "The Power Of Thought", and "The Power Of Concentration" Motivation and Success Systems, and "The Power Of Serenity And Peace" Happiness System. He also authored and produced "The Power Of Qigong" Health And Wellness Systems. He graduated from The College Of New Jersey and Rider University with highest honors.
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