Are you Feeling Exhausted?

By Cheryl Wilms

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Are you wearing yourself thin? Are you trying to be a SuperMom? So many of us mothers have the belief that it is up to us to be responsible for every single member of our family and all the functions of the household. Would you believe me if I told you it did not have to be that way?

We need to take care of ourselves more than ever. If we are going to take care of our family, it is essential to take care of our own needs. There are so many of us that do not put our needs on the back burner. This is not serving you. I am so guilty of this as well.

I keep on thinking that I can take it on, as long as I am organized enough. Then when the task presents itself, then I complain about it. Why am I complaining when I said that it was ok in the first place? Because when I take something on, I have the intentions of wanting to be helpful and useful. I love to feel like I'm taking care of my family and always be the one they go to.

This is not healthy. That is just inviting everyone around me to give me their life tasks and expect this of me. If I do not correct this behavior from myself, resentment may soon follow and this is not what I want to happen. I will accept these tasks from others and the person on the other end will think that I am happy to take it on. I will take on so much and end up blowing up at everyone.

I also find that I expect others to read my mind. At times I expect others around me to just to offer their help and notice what needed to be done around the home. This would cause me to become snappy with others and feel as if they did not want to help me. My lesson here was to learn to delegate. Just like I love the feeling of being helpful, others love the feeling of being helpful. Delegate jobs to others in the household and if they feel they are in charge of something specific, they feel proud of their contribution.

What are things you can do to take care of yourself and make yourself a priority? It does not have to be complicated.

-Allow for adequate sleep. If you are not rested, you will not be able to cope with everyday tasks as you would if you were rested. This will also allow for good focus. (I know I always stay up late to allow for time for myself, but I am in the process of changing this)

-Discuss for your spouse or family member that it is important for you to make time for yourself and it is equally important for their time. See if you both can designate a half hour to an hour per day to do something you enjoy. Make sure that you utilize this time for something you have fun with. Do not use that time to do housework or focus on others. This is your selfish time and your spouse is entitled to this as well.

-Declutter your home. If you have not used something in the last six months to a year, you may want to consider getting rid of it. The reduction of clutter can help you focus, save you time by not shuffling through things to find what you are looking for, and if you sell it on ebay or your local buy and sell, then you can make an extra bit of money while you are at it.

-Prioritize. Obviously making yourself a priority is important, but every day when you are going over your list of to-do's, rate them according to priority. Do what is most important first and get it out of the way. If you do this, you will reduce the feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed. This will also prevent tasks from piling up.

-Delegate to your family. Give everyone a responsibility that they can be in charge of. This will give you more time and you will be teaching others how to treat you. You will also be giving your family great life skills in the process. Have a chore chart and a reward system to keep all members of the family accountable.

I am giving you all permission to take care of yourself. Your mind, body, and soul deserve this and you are entitled to it. Giving to yourself is giving to your family. You will be leading by example and giving those around you permission to be good to themselves. Do not deprive yourself of self love. Nourish your soul and participate in your life.