Conscious Decision Making and knowing when to say NO.

By Samantha Amit

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Conscious consciousness ....is key!
Every second of our day is about making choices. The choices we make are integrally related to our decision making. How aware are we, when we say yes, to the consequences of that decision?

I have a client who told me that she believed that she only had to say yes to the things she wanted in life and then she would find a way to fit it all in. This was a mother of 3 who was also working and had decided to take a course she really wanted to study. When she came to me to work on her time management skills she told me that she was living on such little sleep as the only time she had to do her study assignments was late at night and into the early hours of the morning. We started setting more realistic goals by looking ahead, planning her time. She later reported a to me how much more relaxed she is and that she is enjoying life more without the continuous pressure that she had as a result of taking too much upon herself.

I have noticed with many of my clients that the saying yes comes from a desire to please others, a wanting to give. Only this backfires as others suffer in the end starting with you. In the work environment an efficient employee is always sought out to do more. If you are that employee you have a responsibility to your own well-being to learn the art of saying no, or more gently like - let me first check my calendar and get back to you, or more directly - I would really like to commit to that or help out only right now my schedule doesn’t allow me to take on any more tasks.

To sum up, some tips ….
• Consideration - Take your time before answering someone that has requested something from you. This allows you to check your calendar, check in with yourself – do I really want to say yes? Ask yourself what are the consequences of my saying yes?

• Weekly plan – Set some time to review your past week and plan your present week. I like doing this first thing at the beginning of the week.

• Calendar – Manage your time. A Calendar is critical for moving things forward and being proactive. I recommend having a calendar with all personal and work related activities. If you are using an electronic calendar then you can use multiple calendars and colors to distinguish between personal and work related activities. I like an electronic calendar as you can set recurring events, easily move things around when needed and search for items, which allows me to plan ahead and then find something if need be. I have used both Google Calendar and also MS-Outlook. My current favorite is Google.