Forgiveness can be a contentious topic. When someone has wronged you, and you’re carrying a lot of hurt and anger at that person, others around you will tell you that you need to forgive.
Forgiveness means different things to different people. To some, forgiving means absolving someone of guilt for something they have done. For many others, including myself, forgiveness does not mean that you’re saying that the person who hurt you is absolved of guilt. It means that you realize that in order to live your life, you need to emotionally let go of what may have been holding you back.
Forgiveness is really about getting yourself to a place where you can release the negative emotions that you have about selfforgivenesssomeone, because you’ve made the choice to no longer let what they did be a burden to you. There can be tremendous relief in forgiveness.
I’ve found that it’s much more difficult to figure out how to forgive yourself. We all have things in our past for which we hold ourselves accountable. Sometimes there is a genuine reason for that feeling of accountability, and at other times we get into the “self blame game”.
Speaking from my own personal experience, I spent twelve years in a horribly abusive marriage. Both of my children were forced to endure what went on in my home because I was too afraid to leave. Even though I had been divorced for years, the feeling of guilt about what my kids were exposed to was still there.
Although my failure to leave was the cause of much unhappiness for my children, the fact is that it was a long time ago, and I couldn’t do a darn thing to change the past. All I could do was work on making the future as good as it could be. There was no longer a point to me holding onto all that guilt and self blame, but I couldn’t seem to let go of it.
Then I found EFT!
If you find yourself holding on to guilt and self blame, and you’re in a place where you’re having difficulty forgiving yourself, why not give the script below a try? It might help you to feel a whole lot better!
Tapping Script For Forgiving Yourself
Setup – Karate chop:
- Even though I’ve done some things in my life that I just can’t seem to forgive myself for, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
- Even though I feel like I can’t let myself off the hook for some of the things I’ve done, and I keep beating myself up about it, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
- Even though I realize that of all the people in my life that I need to forgive, I need to forgive myself the most, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself, and I’m ready to start working toward forgiving me.
Eyebrow: I feel so guilty about some of the things that I’ve done
Outside eye: And the way that I might have hurt the people I love
Under eye: Even though the hurt was unintentional
Under nose: I can’t seem to let go of the guilt about causing it
Chin: It makes me feel like I’m not a very nice person
Collar bone: And maybe I’m not even worth forgiving
Under arm: I could forgive anyone else in my life
Top of head: But I can’t seem to forgive myself.
Eyebrow: Carrying around all that guilt
Outside eye: Makes me keep beating myself up
Under eye: But maybe it’s time to start letting go of the guilt
Under nose: And recognizing that I deserve forgiveness
Chin: Starting to release some of that guilt, a little at a time
Collar bone: In a way that feels safe and comfortable for me
Under arm: Opening my heart to the idea
Top of head: That I need to forgive myself, just as I’d forgive anyone else.
Eyebrow: Continuing to release that guilt and self blame
Outside eye: Acknowledging that I was just doing the best I could
Under eye: Letting go of the feeling that I can’t forgive myself
Under nose: And embracing a feeling of forgiveness
Chin: Allowing myself to feel compassion for the person I am
Collar bone: As I continue to release those feelings of guilt
Under arm: Transforming the last of the guilt and self blame
Top of head: Into an energy of healing and forgiveness.