Many of us are carrying around a "wish-list" of the qualities and attributes that we would like in a partner; "tall, financially secure, loving and kind" etc. I have seen wish lists that state which location a person should live in, what car they should drive and what they should do for a living! We can have all sorts of ideas and mental fantasies about what we think our partner and relationship will be like and what we think will make us happy. But a wish list is a bit like a grocery shopping list. Most of us do the weekly shopping as a bit of a chore. It's hard to be inspired or excited about this way of attracting a life-partner.
For years I had a thing in my head about my partner being tall. It was a big deal to me, to the point where I found myself dismissing anyone who wasn't at least 6 foot! I was deeply engrossed in the process of that I now teach and started to questions this idea that I had of my partner being tall. I asked myself "Would I rather be alone or with someone who is not particularly tall?" My answer was clear "Of course not!" I started to look at what it was costing me to hold onto this mental fantasy, to release this idea and open to the possibility of being with someone who wasn't tall. Within a couple of months I met my husband Gary. He's 5 foot 8! It was Gary's energy and who he is that attracted me. I can honestly say that I never think about Gary not being tall. It never enters my head; I'm too busy being happy with the fulfillment of everything I ever wanted in relationship. I didn't need to be with someone tall, it was just an idea in my mind. Some of you might say "But don't we need to be physically attracted to someone?" I believe that when we are willing to get in touch with our deepest desires and are willing to let go of our mental fantasies, we will be met with grace. I am attracted to Gary on every level, including physically.
A wish list is an idea in our mind and has little to do with our deepest desires. Our deepest desires actually lie in our body. Many of us have numbed out from our deepest desires for love. We may have been hurt in the past, or become resigned to not having the love and relationship we long for. But underneath that hurt, pain or resignation lie the most beautiful, valid and true desires. Those desires are good and right and sacred. They are healthy and in line with our birthright to love and be loved. Our deepest desires are very different to our wish list. Our wish list may be somewhat external with a lot of external attributes. It also may contain qualities that we think our partner should have. What we want is to start to feel these deepest desires and qualities in our body. We want to embody what our partner and the experience of love and relationship will BE like. We want to embody it to such a degree that we quickly recognize it when it comes along. This is the nature of the deep soul connection that we yearn for. It has depth, purpose and meaning that way outshines the rather superficial and shallowness that a relationship based on a wish list may have. Our deepest desires are the truth of who we are and are what make our soul sing on the deepest level. When we attract a mate based on our deepest desires, we feel a freedom and joy beyond our wildest dreams.
How to Discover Your Deepest Desires for Love & Relationship:
Sit quietly, free from any distractions. Close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths. Ask yourself:
"What do I most deeply desire to experience with my soul mate?"
"What do I most deeply desire to create with my soul mate?"
"What do I most deeply desire to express with my soul mate?"
"What do I most deeply desire to contribute with my soul mate?"
Really allow yourself to feel your desires. You may find that you feel stuck at first, that these desires have been very suppressed. However, keep practicing. Do this exercise each day. Start to allow yourself to relish and indulge in the beauty of these deepest desires. Write down the words and images that come to you.
How to Craft an Intention for Love:
From the words and images that you wrote from the above exercise, you can begin to craft an intention for love. Use the key points from your deepest desires, the things that are the most prevalent and that you really feel in your body.
Your intention should be only one or two sentences as the idea is to memorize it and say it throughout the day to anchor into.
Play with crafting your intention until you can feel it in your body each and every time you say it. Your intention should light you up, make you feel alive and make your soul sing.
We are here to support you.
Would you like to learn more about getting in touch with your deepest desires, crafting an intention and making that intention your "north star" so that it really manifests?
Originally from the UK, Julie-Anne has very much been on her own personal journey to enable her to do the work she does and comes from a place of deep integrity, compassion, authenticity and commitment.
Passionately believing that the possibilities for our lives are limitless, for the last twelve years Julie-Anne has been supporting and empowering people to create extraordinary lives and extraordinary love!
Through her "Magnetizing Love" coaching, workshops and courses, Julie-Anne has helped many people through the process of attracting their perfect partner, working with individuals, groups, the corporate world and charities both in the UK and the USA. She teaches that everyone has the power to attract the love of their life and to create the relationship of their dreams.
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