I know how confusing all the hype about how to attract men can be. There is so much advice out there about how to attract the opposite sex. One study says that men are attracted to the colors red or black. One says that women are more approachable when they wear tank tops or sleeveless tops. Others say to wear dresses, men like more feminine women.

It hurts me to see amazing interesting and beautiful women trying so hard to “do the right thing” and feeling so much pressure to be perfect so she can try and attract a boyfriend. It is painful to watch women trying to be “perfect” while realizing that being “perfect” never works.

What I have found is the most attractive and magnetic thing a woman can do is smile!

“Happiness is the secret to all beauty;
There is no beauty that is attractive without happiness
Christian Dior

Ever have that friend who changes her style based on the man she is dating. She dates a stockbroker and she straightens her hair, wears dresses and conservative shoes. She dates a painter and suddenly she is wearing funky hats, black tees and distressed jeans.

Her preferences change too. She only likes fine dining and then suddenly fine dining is “out” and trendy cafes are in. Hmmm…

I think we have all been subject to this “changeability” at some time in our life. When we really like a guy, it is tempting to try to be the person he would want to be with. But what is the effect of this chameleon approach to relationships?

It is causes a great deal of stress.
And it can actually cause him to lose interest because at some level he is aware that you are inauthentic. Which is boring.

Do not spend another moment of your time and attention worrying about what a man will like, what colors, what clothes, what characteristics he will find attractive- long hair, short hair etc. You will go crazy trying to mold yourself into what you think is the image of the perfect woman. Instead, wear clothes you love and feel good in, wear your hair in a style that reflects your personality and it is guaranteed the right guy will take notice!
After her divorce Carrie found herself feeling lost and like a failure. She wanted to remarry right away and began a man hunt for her next husband. Immediately she went out and purchased size DDD breasts. Then she spent thousands of dollars on low cut tops to show off her new “figure”. She began a cycle of flings with each new guy being “the one”.

With every failed “relationship” she grew more and desperate to fill the void. She added botox, liposuction and diet pills to her man-hunting regime. She never wears the same outfit twice. So far, she has had about 20 “boyfriends” this year but still no real relationship.

We asked a single guy friend why he would never date Carrie, he said “she’s too fake”.

Don’t waste another minute thinking you need to be skinnier, younger, or more attractive.

Your man wants you!!

We all really want the same thing from love, a beloved life partner who loves you and is your biggest fan. A man who as Kathryn Alice puts it “can’t see past you”!

Deep in our heart, we crave to be SEEN. There is nothing that compares with the feeling of really been seen and loved by your life partner.

The best way to attract YOUR true love is to be yourself! The man you are meant to be with wants you not a façade of who you think he wants you to be.

Be fearless! Wear the clothes you like! Listen to the music you love! Find a hobby you enjoy and do it!

Your true love is out there waiting to welcome you into his life with open arms. All you have to do is show up and be yourself!!

Much Love and Happy Dating

Author's Bio: 

If you are single and worried that you’ll never find true love or you are losing faith that your special person is ever coming... Pamela Vandervoort will help you find true and lasting love.

Pamela received her master’s degree in Spiritual Psychology from the University of Santa Monica and her Bachelor’s Degree in Communication Studies from the University of San Diego.  Pamela can be found conducting workshops throughout California and is the owner of two successful Companies the “Art of Living Consciously” and “My Dating Support.com”.

For the last 5 years Pamela has been helping women get over the dating hump, stop wasting time, and find lasting love.