How to Deal With Approach Anxiety – the Importance of Social Warm-Up

You enter a bar; you see lots of attractive women around you, but you just… kind of freeze. What seems weird, because just yesterday you were at the same bar and felt no anxiety at all.
But today, you feel nothing, you just keep staring at your glass of beer, and have no idea how you managed to overcome your fear and approach women just yesterday.
Sounds familiar? Well, it seems to happen to every man. The idea of starting a conversation with people who we don't know, especially attractive women, is pretty uncomfortable to us. And even if you manage to overcome the fear once, it will come back again and again.rnToday I want to expose one of the most important secrets of picking up women, and communication in general – this is called Social Warm-Up.rnFor men who want to know how to pick up women in bars – reading this post is a must.

Get Ready For Social Interactions
When you go to the gym, before beginning your exercises, you need to warm up. This warm up prepares your body and muscles for the physical work.rnSingers and public speakers warm up too – they prepare their throat and vocal strings to make the perfect sound.rnAnd the same thing needs to be done before going to pick up women, or any other kind of social interactions. During the day, you don't approach people out of the blue, right? It would be the best to get used to starting conversations with people you don't know also during the day.rnBut because most people don't do this, a warm up to get used to being social is totally necessary.rnWarming up your social skills is simple, but you need to understand how it's done and accept the idea that like a warm up before working up, you will need to warm up again every time you go out.

So How Can You Easily Warm Up?
Many pick-up artists suggest using some new-age methods to overcome approach anxiety, such as listening to tantric music, or watching hypnotic videos.rnBut I believe in being realistic and to use simple methods to warm up. When I enter a club, I don't just go approaching girls that I like. Instead, I do warm up exercises.rnThe most common one that is used by pick-up artists, is similar to warm up in sports – you begin with the easy tasks first.

Here is what I do when I enter a club:
I get in, start enjoying the music, and immediately chat with the staff of the bar – even if it's just asking some basic question, such as "where is the toilet?". On the next step, I would talk with a guy, just ask some random question. In fact, guys usually go out to meet chicks (even if eventually the get afraid and don't approach any girls). So a good questions to ask a guy would be, "How are the chicks here?", "Do you know if hot girls come here too?", etc. You will see that men would love to answer your questions. Then, you make a step forward, and approach a girl. But you don't approach a girl that you are interested in – just approach some random girl, and your goal is not to succeed –you purpose is to fail. You don't want to get the girl's number or get laid. You also don't need to use any unique opinion openers. You don't need to care about what happens. If you know what attracts women, you can even intentionally ruin your approach. Remember – your goal is to approach and fail. That's it – these are the 3 steps of warm up. After you approach a girl and intentionally fail, you will be well-warmed up, and ready to do thern