Have you ever realized how often you blame yourself for your current circumstances? Perhaps you have made a mistake, done something silly or brought about dire consequences that dragged others down even. Whether big or small, you cannot let go of your emotional attachment to the memory of your misdeed.
When you find yourself in a constant cycle of self-blame, it is time to end the cycle. Hanging on to the past prevents you from moving forward. It is possible to end up with tremendous self-loathing; thus resulting in destructive behaviors such as alcohol addiction.
Being stuck in self-blame is no way to live. Here are 5 simple ways to stop blaming yourself:
1. Journaling. When you are able to express what you feel, you invariably feel better. It is as if a load has been lifted off of your shoulders. You are much more able to move on. It can also be helpful to write a forgiveness letter to yourself. The letter to yourself should include the things that are making you feel guilty. After you have written such a letter, instead of re-reading it over and over, shred or burn it. The shredding of the letter is symbolic of ending the cycle of self-blame. It is a ritual well worth observing. It can help you let go of self-blame.
2. Mirror exercise. Another helpful way to release self blame is to look yourself in the eye in the mirror every day for 30 days and say, "I forgive you, and I don't blame you." Fair warning: this might feel a little bit silly at first because you find it weird talking to yourself. Never underestimate the effects of what this exercise can do. After a week or two, you will be less uncomfortable with facing yourself in the mirror.
3. Release judgment. Be aware that everyone makes mistakes and that you deserve forgiveness too. You are not perfect. So stop judging yourself harshly. Treat mistakes as learning experiences. Avoid viewing them as failures. Instead, use them as opportunities for improvement and growth.
4. Undertake self-compassion. It can be very easy to find yourself always caring for others. It is also much easier for you to forgive others even. Consider turning compassion inwards too. Understand that you need as much compassion as anyone else. If you cannot care for yourself, you cannot expect the same from others.
5. Avoid holding on to the past. A dangerous habit is constantly dwelling on the past, and specifically past mistakes. Force yourself to get off of the couch and move forward. Trust yourself enough to make a fresh start, and you will have a much easier time letting go of self-blame.
Blame is toxic energy. When you are in self-blame, it is not possible to be happy. You tear yourself apart with your criticisms. You become your worst enemy.
There is nothing that you can do over the past, except to learn from your mistakes and move on. The more you cut yourself some slack, the easier it will be to improve yourself. If you find yourself slipping back into your old habits, forgive yourself and keep moving forward. Break the chains of self-blame that hold you back from living a full life.
A life coach, Evelyn Lim believes in mastering the self for manifesting abundance. Her personal creed is: Change begins with you. Be a luminary of love and light. She is also author to the book, Self-Love Secrets, in which she shares many enlightening lessons about loving the self.
Evelyn is passionate about helping others in the areas of visioning, emotional healing, creativity, and attraction. Her site attracts thousands of visitors every month. For free articles, please subscribe to her newsletter when you visit her site at http://www.AbundanceTapestry.com/signupform.htm.