How To Make My Husband Care For Me: When A Man Doesn't Care About Your Feelings

So many married women will confess to wondering this very thing at some point during their relationship. It's hard not to feel neglected when your husband's attention is divided by so many things, yet you're not one of them. With the pressures of maintaining a career, paying bills, tending to household repairs and being a dad, he can start to overlook your need and desire to have attention too. You can change the dynamic of your relationship with your spouse so it's more balanced and you feel the love and adoration you want.

Before you do anything you need to examine your own behavior in the marriage if you want your husband to care for you more. Think honestly about how you've been treating your husband. Just as he may be neglecting you, perhaps you are doing the same to him. If a husband feels that his wife is preoccupied with everything but their marriage, he'll start to emotionally detach from the situation. Once this happens, you'll notice that he's less attentive and loving.

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If you feel that is indeed the case, you need to make the first move towards repairing the lost connection. Start treating your man exactly the same way you did when you two first married. If you made a point of cooking his favorite dinner once a week, get back into that habit. Plan a romantic evening out for the two of you or buy tickets to his favorite team and go with him to the game. Often, if a woman makes the first step, her husband will quickly follow and will start treating her the way he once did again.

Your husband may very well be taking you for granted just because he's so comfortable within the relationship. You can typically tell when this starts to happen because he'll stop listening to you, he won't tend to his chores around the house and he'll forget things like your birthday or wedding anniversary. In this case, your approach needs to be a bit different.

Get out and start doing more for yourself if you feel that your husband isn't appreciating you as his wife anymore. If you've put your life on hold, start living it again. Get a part time job if you spend most of your time being a full time mom. Volunteer or join the local gym. Also, go out with your girlfriends more. Once your husband sees that you do indeed have a life that reaches beyond the confines of your home, he'll sit up and take notice. He'll realize that you're still a dynamic and interesting woman and that you have choices. If he feels you slipping away, he may just start pouring on the love and adoration again.

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There comes a time when your trying your best to save your marriage that you start to think that nothing is going to work and that your marriage is destined for divorce. Sometimes it just seems like it's all too much to handle or you just don't have it in you to see it through, or for that matter even see a clear solution in site. But, don't lose all hope just yet, there are still things you can do to save your marriage that don't involve counseling or for that matter that your spouse even participates.

A lot of times it's the things that your doing, rather than the things that your not doing that stand in your way. Let's run down a checklist here to make sure that your not doing some of the things that will keep you from saving your marriage:

- Making decisions based off of panic or letting this feeling cloud your judgement

- Crying and/or begging your spouse to stay in the marriage

- Making promises to change on the condition that they stay in the marriage

- Bothering your spouse at work or while their out with talks about the marriage

- Making threats to harm yourself or damage your spouses belongings if they leave

- Giving your spouse ultimatums " If you do this, then I'll do that"

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- Continuing to play the blame game back and forth with each other

- Letting your emotions control what you do and say (anger, confusion, desperation, jealousy etc.)

- Giving up, seemingly depressed or letting yourself go (laying in bed, not eating, not dressing yourself or properly keeping up with your grooming and hygiene, house, chores, kids etc.)

All of those things serve to negatively impact your efforts to save your marriage, knowing them and eliminating their ability to stand in your way of saving your marriage should be handled immediately.

The next part of saving your marriage is coming up with a good plan to do so. Some people think that counseling will help or that they should seek out expensive marital therapy sessions and or consider it the only means in which the marriage can be saved. But, this couldn't be further from the truth. Although, there are good counselors out there, finding one is an expensive and debilitating battle in itself. Given the less than 10-20% success rate of counseling, it's effectiveness in saving marriages is more than questionable to say the least.

The point is, don't give up. There are plans out there to save your marriage, their just not mainstream and you don't see them on the news. Nor, will you ever really come across someone at the water cooler so to speak that will open up about it and point you in the right direction. Just because other things have failed you, doesn't mean there isn't another way to do it that actually works.

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"My husband doesn't love me anymore!" Most marriage counseling experts say that this is the single most heard statement they hear from wives. But it's understandable - I have gone through it too. My marriage had started so good, a great ceremony, a dream-like honeymoon... Yet, as time passed, and realities settled in, there were a lot of problems, and I was wondering: "does my husband love me?"

When you think that you lost the love of your spouse and that your marriage is ending, this quickly makes you desperate. It made me go wild with desperation, but I didn't know how to make my husband love me again. So I did the only thing I could think of: Begging him to stay in the marriage.

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Of course, begging can never be the answer when you think "my husband doesn't love me anymore, what do I do?". Actually, it makes everything worse; because it makes him even more fed up with you. Yet, in that desperate situation, I know that emotions can overtake you easily and lead you to do all the wrong things. I know that you feel the urge to do something quickly to make husband love you again before the marriage slips out of your hand forever.

But, knee-jerk reactions can never be the correct answer. Do not forget that people want what they CAN'T have, not what they CAN have easily! This is why you should stay away from apologizing, begging, etc. - desperate knee-jerk reactions. When I thought "my husband doesn't love me anymore", I didn't realize that I needed to make myself harder to have, instead of easier.

So, what must really be done if you are wondering "does my husband love me, and what do I do if he doesn't?" is that you should be more elusive to him. You should pull yourself together and not look (or be) apologetic, desperate, depressed and begging. This makes you look "pathetic" and in your husband's mind, makes you a lot less attractive!

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I often hear from people who are at the point where they've been threatened that the only way that their marriage is going to stand a chance is to agree to go to counseling. Often, the frustrated spouse who wants the counseling has asked for this multiple times in many different ways. Usually, one spouse has refused to go and, at least for a while, this worked. However, when nothing changes in the marriage and things continue to deteriorate, this is usually when one spouse can begin to make demands or to play hard ball. It's not uncommon for a spouse to threaten the other with a separation or divorce unless counseling happens immediately.

You may hear a comment like: "my marriage isn't what my husband wants. He doesn't think that I am attentive enough to him and he doesn't think that we have enough sex or intimacy in our marriage. I think that he is probably overreacting. And I think that he probably expects too much from someone who is juggling a job, child care, being a wife, and running a household. For several months, my husband has pushed me to go with him to counseling. I am not sure what he feels that a counselor can do for us other than to tell me that I need to go ahead and be more attentive to my husband. I have resisted counseling because it's a lot of money and because I don't think that we have problems that are insurmountable. It's not as if we don't love each other or one of us is cheating. It's just that my husband wants more from me and is never satisfied. So, I feel that counseling will be an added expense and a waste of time. However, last night my husband told me that my refusing to go to counseling is no longer an option. He said that if I refuse to go, he will move out and initiate a separation that will likely lead to a divorce. He says that he is sick of me not having to do anything in regards to our marriage and he is not going to take this anymore. Where does this leave me? What can I do?"

Honestly, this husband was free to respond in any way that he wanted, as was the wife. I understand resisting counseling. Many folks hate the idea of sitting in a stranger's office and baring their deepest feelings and fears. I get why this is not anyone's idea of a good time. However, I have to say that in my experience and opinion, it's very rare for the husband to be the one to initiate counseling. Many wives would jump at the chance to go to counseling with a husband who was actually willing and wanting to be there.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

To learn the killer, advanced strategies to save your marriage, simply click here!

Why I Think You Should Consider Meeting Him Half Way: It's not unusual for counseling to not be as awful as you anticipated, especially if you take the time to do some research and to find the right one. You can always agree to try this out on a trial basis and then make an evaluation from there. But one thing appears to be clear to me. This husband was more than willing to work on his marriage in order to save it, but he was most definitely losing his patience. That's a combination that is easily fixed. Much of the time, I hear from people who are desperate to get their spouse to agree to save their marriage. And, in this case, you have a situation where the spouse has literally taken the initiative to seek out counseling. You really can't ask for more than this.

The fear that the counselor is going to blame you or is going to require for you to be the one to make all of the changes is a very common one. But, it's my opinion that a good counselor will be balanced. A good counselor makes each party feel as if they conceded a little, but also won a little. A good counselor makes sure both spouses leave the session feeling like they got something worthwhile out of it. Admittedly, sometimes it takes a while to find the counselor who is a good fit, but I think that it is worth the effort. I would suggest being willing to at least try one session just so your spouse sees that you are willing to meet him halfway.

If you don't feel better or more enthusiastic after one session, then you can always talk to your spouse about finding another counselor that both of you might like better or you may agree to see out self help that you can both get behind. EIther option can work, as long as you are committed to making real changes in your marriage and moving forward.

Ignoring This Involves Risk: In my view just ignoring this situation or trying to make your spouse feel as if he are asking too much should not be an option. Because if you do that, there's a real risk in him feeling as if you don't care enough to make an effort and becoming so frustrated that he leaves or even worse files for divorce.

If you know that you want to save your marriage, then I believe that it's worth it to do whatever is necessary to make this happen, including counseling or finding some self help that you can both agree upon. To me, the type of help isn't as important as getting the help that is going to be effective. But when your spouse is making it very clear that he's no longer going to accept the status quo, then it's important to pay attention.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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