Can it be true? Yes. Is there such a thing as hypnosis for fertility when couples are having problems becoming parents? Oh, Yes. It’s hard to believe because over thousands of years no one has been able to explain fully why hypnosis works in the easy cases, let alone a complicated topic like fertility. Easy cases like stopping smoking, weight loss, and insomnia are still somewhat mysterious, but Hey, evidence is evidence: you sleep through the night, lose weight, have no urge to smoke. Everyone can see it (except insurance companies). Hypnosis for fertility is more complicated to explain because so many variables are involved, like sexual behavior, bacteria, the permeability of the eggs, hormonal levels, sperm profiles, and other endless factors that can occur between pregnancy and the delivery of a healthy child some 9 months later. How could hypnosis possibly help across so many variables?
Here come the answers. Ready? Wake up, I mean…Ready? This isn’t child’s play (Ach, sorry). It’s going to get complicated. Here goes…
While I generally support and admire Western medicine, fertility issues deal in statistics that for most couples are befuddling and eventually infuriating. “This in vitro process has an 82% chance of achieving fertilization.” “That implantation process has a 90% success rate.” “Your hormonal levels give you a 74% chance of carrying to full term.” “Delivery in these cases is successful 87% of the time.” “A healthy child is the outcome in 92% of these cases.” Sounds wonderful at first, but then it gets messy. If you’re told that some in vitro process is successful for 82% of couples, then are you in this 82%, or in the other 18% who are expected to be unsuccessful? The answer is unknown. When you ask about this, you might be told that 77% of the people your age end up in the 82% profile, but now that same unknown recurs: Are you in the 77% who end up in the 82%, or in the other 23% who end up in the 18%? It goes on and on like this. Answers are unknown and remains unknown. Eventually this is infuriating as you come to realize that you can never know which statistic applies to you. So you can’t tell if you’re going forward, backward, or nowhere. Over months this creates huge psychological stress.
There’s another problem with statistics. In retail the saying goes, “People who go to the hardware store don’t want a 1/4″ drill, they want a 1/4″ hole. The drill is just an intermediate step.” Just so, couples don’t want pregnancy. They want a child, specifically a healthy child. Drugs, fertilization processes, implantations, and so forth are just intermediate steps. So while the probabilities of success for each step sound promising (e.g., “an 82% chance of achieving in vitro fertilization”), the probability of reaching the endpoint, a healthy child, is the product of all the probabilities along the way. Using the (hypothetical) profile above to illustrate, the probability of delivering a healthy child would be .82 x .90 x .74 x .87 x .92, which equals 43.7%. So statistics that looked so promising, taken one by one, turn out overall to predict failure (for 56.3% of couples in this profile).
Can hypnosis alter these mathematical calculations? No, not at all.
Hypnosis enters the picture in the following 3 ways:
1. Hypnosis can increase the sex in your life. This isn’t minor. While it’s true that some couples are having sex but failing to conceive for separate medical reasons, lots of couples who begin fertility treatments aren’t having or stop having normal sex, diagram it according to some formula, thereby creating a problem that wasn’t there before. Unless you know for sure that you have a specific, diagnosed medical problem, then the likeliest pathway to fertility is still the old fashioned method, namely as much sex as often as possible. Forget charts and schedules. As much sex as often as possible. Hypnosis can make this goal easy and fun. As much sex as often as possible.
2. Most couples who begin fertility treatments start trying to conceive a child. This sounds normal, but it’s a huge mistake. Huh? How come? Because trying to achieve conception is an unnatural psychological state, possibly an unnatural physiological state as well. Hypnosis for fertility means freeing the mind from the misbegotten notion that a future mother or father should be “trying” or, even worse, “trying harder.” The processes of conception and birth are natural on this planet and do not require conscious intent or effort. Hypnosis for fertility means releasing the couple from the false bondage of useless “trying” and, instead, opening the door to simply being female and male with each other, leaving the date of conception open to whenever nature determines. No trying needed…or wanted.
3. The primary use of hypnosis for fertility is in collating the mind’s instructions to the body so that the mind itself guides and instigates the birth of a healthy child. Here’s an interesting question? How does the body know how to function? How does the liver know what to do? It’s common but wrong to think that the liver contains intentions or encodings that allow it to function by itself for itself. No, the liver is receiving signals. Where are these instructions coming from? Easy. The brain. And so on for the heart, the kidneys, and when it comes to fertility…the ovaries, testes, fallopian tubes, uterus, and so forth. They’re all getting signals as to how to function from the brain. Hypnosis for fertility succeeds by turning the body’s reproductive functioning over to the guidance and power of the unconscious mind, which is where the signals for physiological and reproductive functioning are coming from anyway. It’s obvious that the mind, which regulates signals throughout the whole the body to create and preserve health and well-being, will create pregnancy and preserve the delivery of a healthy child. Your unconscious mind is your friend, always your friend, and nothing but your friend. (The notion that the unconscious harbors ugly impulses and dangerous goals is a common mistake—but Hey, that’s another topic. If you ask why well-being goes awry, it’s the interference of our conscious minds—but Hey, that’s another topic.)
About once a year a couple calls me to use hypnosis for fertility. It’s not a lot of cases, but a healthy child has been the outcome 100% of the time..
I can be reached @ (212) 371-0271 or you may contact me through my website http://garyahlskog.com
Gary Ahlskog is a NYS Licensed Psychologist, Certified Psychotherapist, Psychoanalyst, and Master Hypnotist with offices in NYC and East Hampton. Individuals and couples. Over 30 years of experience.