“I Think You Expected Too Much!”

A few days after my father passed away in august 2011, I went to Ibiza for just under two weeks. At the time I was in two minds about going away: part of me felt I should stay at home, and another part of me felt that it would be good for me to get away.

The mentor that I spoke about in the “No One Will Listen To You!” article said that I should go as I needed a break. My mother, on the other hand, said that I shouldn’t go away.

A Welcome Break

Even though my father had only passed on a few days before I went away, it still hadn’t sunk in. I did feel relieved, though, that he was now free from all the pain that he had been experiencing for so long.

Shorty after I arrived, I felt that I had made the right decision. This was somewhere that I had thought about visiting for many years, primarily because I was into dance music.

Up and Down

At times, I ended up feeling drained, and this was often the case when I woke up. What helped was that I had gone away with a good friend and that I had the chance to talk to different people.

One evening when we went down to get dinner I started speaking to this attractive blond woman. I had already spoken to a number of other people when we came down for dinner and breakfast, so I wasn’t doing anything that I hadn’t done before.

The Difference

Still, what was different was that I met a woman who was unlike any other women I had met during this time. Not only was she gorgeous, she also had a great energy, and it soon become clear that it wasn’t one-sided either.

After this, we continued to talk when we saw each other at breakfast or dinner. We then exchanged numbers and started to text, and it didn’t take long before we arranged to meet.

It Didn’t Last Long

However, although everything was going well, it wasn’t long before she had to go back home. She wasn’t going back to England, though, she was going back to Germany.

As I hadn’t been there for long, I felt incredibly annoyed that she would be leaving soon. We continued to speak after she had gone home, and I sad that once I got home I would go and visit her.

Another Trip

After I had been back for a number of weeks, I ended up flying out Germany. When I got there I was slightly early, so I headed into the town and ended up going into a cafe.

I had something to eat and then it was soon time for me to head back to the train station to meet her. When I met her again, it soon hit me that something wasn’t right; it was as if what was there was no longer there.

Two Experiences

I came to see that what had been taking place in my mind didn’t match up with the reality of the situation. But as I was going to be for there for about five days, I did what I could to go along with it.

The kind of connection that we had whilst we were away was no longer there. It became clear that I wasn’t the only one who had a lot of stuff going on at home, as there were a number of things in her life that she wasn’t happy about.

Completely Deluded

Ultimately, the kind of connection that we had in Ibiza was the result of a number of different factors. So now that we were no longer in the same environment, it was to be expected that it would be different.
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I had been too caught up in what took place in Ibiza to think about all this. Before I got there, I actually thought that we could have a long distance relationship.

Crashing Back Down To Earth

There were a number of moments when I wondered what I was doing there. My ability to think clearly had been offline for a little while but after I had been there for few days it soon came back online.

On the morning before I went home, this woman’s mother said that I expected too much from her daughter. When I heard this part of me didn’t want to accept it, but another part of me knew that she was right.