WAYS TO CONNECT
Facebook is a place to connect but is it a place for love?
Facebook can certainly be a starting point; obviously it can’t be the ending point for love such as marital love. Also is it true or real love – is it sustainable and lasting love?
Could Facebook be a good starting point for marital love?
If we look at Western love – starting on Facebook cannot be worse than meeting in a bar or club. Numerous Western marriages start in bars, clubs and discos.
I have a brother who met his wife in a bar – their marriage did last for over 20 years but ended in divorce. I am not sure of the exact reasons but it may have been in part because she could not give him children. My own parents met in a work situation – my Mum and Dad worked in the same company when they met. My parents’ marriage lasted for less than 20 years because my father passed away. My grandmother met her husband on holiday on the Isle of Man. Hers lasted for over 30 years before my grandfather passed away.
WESTERN MARITAL LOVE
Thus in the West, there has to be a starting point so Facebook could be a good place to get introduced. It is a meeting of minds point so why not – it could be the start of something great especially if you have common interests and are on Facebook to enhance those particular interests.
If you watch a person’s postings and comments over a period of time you certainly get to know their personality, character, their associates and what makes them tick. In Western culture, you need to know a person’s character and that certainly is possible on Facebook – certainly glimpses of them.
Also what do you want to do with that love? Take it into the real world? - it may not be transferable love. The reality of physical love is that wherever you meet – it might not be transferable love.
THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE - IS YOUR LOVE TRANSFERABLE?
This is the most challenging aspect of physical and romantic love. The ability to transfer love to other situations, such as living together, is by no means easy, guaranteed or lasting. Whether it is true or real love - whether it is sustainable and lasting love - these are questions that we all have whatever the meeting or starting point. Sustaining love is the one of the greatest challenges of the 21st century.
THE DEFINITION OF LOVE
We have to think of the meaning or definition of love. If by love - you mean the brotherhood of man, then that type of love is possible on Facebook but if you are talking about romantic love then I think you have to be very careful. Also where does romantic love lead to - romantic love has to lead to something and that can't be fulfilled on Facebook. Romance involves some form of physical love. The best place for that is in a long-term real-world relationship and in my opinion marriage if you are fortunate enough to meet a suitable person to marry.
MUSLIM MARITAL LOVE
In the Muslim world, romantic love is to be within marriage. Thus if you believe in the Muslim way then no Facebook is not the place to start romantic love. It starts upon marriage. The Muslim way is love develops in marriage. Love should deepen in marriage.
WHAT IS MY PERSONAL STAND? People meet so Facebook can be the start – and we can love at a pure holy level – that love is certainly possible on Facebook. My greatest concern with romantic love wherever it starts is whether it can last. If you have that lasting variety then you are very blessed. Sadly the divorce courts tell another story of the sustainability of marital love.
The greatest question in the 21st century and throughout the ages – is it true or real love? Is it sustainable and lasting love?
Susan McKenzie is a contributor www.abetoday.com. An I CAN READ English specialist with over 20 years teaching experience, I have worked in the British Council and Linguaphone, well-known language institutions. I am a London-trained lawyer and have been the public affairs officer at the British High Commission, Singapore, as well as an editor in an international book publishing house and a national magazine. In 2006, I was appointed as an Ambassador of Peace (Universal Peace Federation and Interreligious and International Federation for World Peace). I am also co-author of two law books: English Legal System and Company Law, published by Blackstone, Oxford University Press. For enquiries about I CAN READ classes, email firstname.lastname@example.org. FOR DAILY BLESSINGS: www.abetoday.com