Money Matters

By Marie Dixon Frisch

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Money Matters

I had saved about 70000 Swiss francs before I retired from medicine at 36. I spent a few years using it to cover expenses while I found myself. When my husband and I returned to Europe in 2007, I had about 22000 dollars left.

The blue bank I went to—because I liked the color—promised to take care of the closing and transfer of my Swiss account. I withdrew a small reserve which I deposited in a red bank, then let the blue banker shred my Swiss bank card to return it with the transfer order.

Weeks passed and the blue bank’s ATMs repeatedly told me I had no money.
Fortunately, I had put the reserve Euros in that red bank. I withdrew enough to survive in 20 Euro increments. Although my husband and I kept separate accounts, we shared expenses. His small reserve carried us through the first month. I returned to the blue bank. They couldn’t explain why the transfer was taking so long.
I phoned my Swiss bank, got lost in the automated system before someone finally helped me. Apparently, the blue bank had delayed two weeks before forwarding the transfer order. But I would have my funds in a couple of days.

The funds came through. I had about 15000 Euros—I caught an unfortunate exchange rate and got less money while the bank got more. We used most of the money to establish ourselves, pay the security deposit on an apartment, buy furniture and basic household necessities and live until one of us got a job.

Some of the funds were still in bonds I had bought for lack of better knowledge on how to invest money. I went to the blue bank to liquidate my reserves. A lower level employee, incredulous that someone like me should have such reserves, told me I couldn’t access the money. I went higher and found a smooth-talking manager who glibly convinced me to invest with the blue bank’s solid, low risk plan. My husband had accompanied me to the meeting. We were offered drinks and the blue manager set up an elaborate investment portfolio with graphs and charts I didn’t understand.

All the while I had the feeling something wasn’t right.
The feeling persisted. I had nightmares. I tried to ignore them, tried to reassure myself.

Then came the first economic slump, I lost about a thousand Euros.

I returned to the bank; the glib manager was no longer available, so I spoke with a lower level employee again. He reassured me that he too had set his money in blue bank portfolios, that they were safe. Market fluctuations were normal and he was convinced things would recover after a while. But my gut feeling told me otherwise. I closed my blue bank account, and after some delay, they gave me back my money, with an even greater loss after the fees.

But something had changed. I didn’t care enough about money to learn the financial wizardry game, but I was no longer willing to be the victim in a win-lose situation. I began to take responsibility for my money.

I put my remaining 5000 Euros in a low interest red bank fund with government bonds. During the economic crisis, the blue bank was hit hard. If I had left my money there, I would have had little or nothing left. Yet, the blue bank’s CEO came away with hundreds of millions in bonuses and compensation.

I worked at my medium paying self-employed jobs and saved 2500 Euro during the worst six months of the global financial crisis. I consciously chose not take part in the recession. I knew there was no need. My experience with lacking money while having so much—compared to others—had taught me an important lesson.

My aunt, who has a similar attitude—i.e. money is for spending and sharing—was faced with the foreclosure on her home. My mother cashed in her life insurance at a fraction of the value to help her sister make the mortgage payments. In a way, my aunt’s money attitude worked. When she was in need, someone shared, just as she always shares when she has more than enough.

Now I am taking time to reorient myself. I’ll be spending some of the 7500 savings to tide me over until I start earning more again. My husband got a little worried because I quit a job that no longer suits me. He is afraid we might fall on hard times. But when times are hard, bouncing back is easier. There’s nothing that increases momentum like the resistance of firm ground.

When I first wrote the business plan for my clown consulting service, I neglected money. In some ways, money doesn’t matter. It’s following my higher purpose, doing what I do best, enjoying life and sharing that are most important to me.

A friend of mine got my personal reading done by an old Thai fortuneteller. He said I would never hang on to money because I will always find ways to spend it. And personally, I think that’s fine. I would rather be a channel for wealth than a repository. I’ve never wanted to be a millionaire. I think I would hate the bother of having to spend so much money well. And the miracle is that no matter how little I have, I always have enough.

But recently, I received a newsletter from Selfgrowth.com featuring an interview with T. Harv Eker, the author of the Millionaire Mind. And it hit me: I could be a millionaire if I wanted. But if I’m going to pursue money, why stop at millions, billionaires are the in thing now…What’s next?

Eker’s message rang true in many respects. I have been holding back. I do have a limiting attitude as far as money is concerned. My blueprint is twisted and confining. But is that necessarily a bad thing? It was guilt over the inequality and unfairness in the world that made me leave a (too?) high paying position in Switzerland to become a poor clown in Jamaica.

Sometimes I dream of that platinum credit card I gave up. But in fact, it’s just another piece of plastic like the red bank ATM card I now have.
Money comes and goes, that is the nature of the world. My task is to deal with the money I have responsibly. My challenge is to find the balance between the cushy Swiss existence and the rock-bottom reality of poverty. I am definitely not a money expert. But I know I can find the right attitude to use money appropriately to help me achieve what I’m here to do.