Anger is a very powerful emotion which many conclude is a bad feeling. Whether one chooses to use it in a constructive manner or in a hostile way, it carries a lot of punch (figuratively speaking, of course). As you become angry your body's muscles tense up. Inside your brain, neurotransmitter chemicals are released, your heart rate accelerates, blood pressure rises, and your rate of breathing increases, all in preparation for you to take some type of physical action. Additionally, adrenaline and noradrenalin are released which trigger a state of heightened awareness. You're now ready to fight or run.
There are certain benefits associated with anger, specifically that it alerts us to the fact that something is wrong and needs our attention. However, if one is not adept at effectively expressing and eventually healing it, it can lead to volatile outbursts, aggressive behavior, or, over an extended period of time, to medical maladies. One of the greatest challenges people face is allowing others to push their buttons and make them angry. In doing so, one relinquishes the ability to choose their feelings and subsequent actions. Whenever an individual is in a highly emotional state of mind, they run an increased risk of saying or doing something destructive that can have serious consequences and devastating effects on themselves and/or those around them.
A more advantageous and effective state of mind is that of inner peace. While some view peacefulness as a sign of weakness or ineffectiveness, the exact opposite is actually true. When one is peaceful, they are operating with a clear and present mind. Being calm enables one to focus better and thereby see the situation from a more rational perspective. A clear mind gathers relevant information and enables the individual to make an intellectual decision as to what steps, if any, to take. Being peaceful does not mean one fails to address such issues as injustice, arrogance, selfishness, abuse, disrespect, and such. Those behaviors that one deems unfavorable or morally or socially inappropriate are carefully identified and brought forth for discussion.
From a physiological perspective, when one is calm breathing becomes slow, deep, and regular; heart rate slows down; blood flow improves, and muscle tension is reduced. Peacefulness supports brain growth and the generation and maintenance of synapses which are responsible for transmitting information throughout the brain. Lack of stress strengthens the body's natural immune system, thus improving one's overall physical health. Peaceful people are generally happier, live more fulfilling lives (they are not easily agitated by life's everyday challenges), have healthier relationships, and live longer (less stress = longer life)
Emotions are neither positive or negative. In actuality, they are messengers that give us insight into ourselves, what matters to us and what's unimportant, as well as what our personal issues are so that we may address and heal them.
Peace is at the root of all beneficial and healthy emotions. One cannot experience happiness, gratitude, joy, love, contentment, etc. unless they are at peace with themselves and those around them. When one is experiencing a sense of contentment in that moment, then anger, fear, resentment, etc cannot manifest as the mind can only create one emotion at a time. A positive thought-process generates like feelings.
You cannot grow lilacs in a cold, dark, damp environment. While there is intrinsic value in those environmental conditions, if what you are seeking are brightly colored and sweetly scented flowers then you must provide sunlight, warmth, and the exact right amount of moisture. Anything less will produce a contradictory product.
While anger gives the illusion of power, in actuality it can very easily cause us to relinquish control over ourselves and our lives. Choose your authentic power, the ability to consciously and calmly respond to life on your terms rather than react emotionally to what is occurring around you.
So, if you want to gain an advantage in life, choose to live from a place of inner peace and serenity. Your body will thank you; your friends and family will thank you; and most importantly, you will be pleased beyond measure for you have discovered the key to blissful living.
Maintaining peace in any situation:
Stop what you're doing. Take a deep breath. Evaluate the situation (is it important or not?). Choose to get involved or let it go. If it needs your attention, create a rational plan of action.
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Janet Pfeiffer, international inspirational speaker and award-winning author has appeared on CNN, Lifetime, ABC News, The 700 Club, NBC News, Fox News, The Harvest Show, Celebration, TruTV and many others. She’s been a guest on over 100 top radio shows (including Fox News Radio), is a contributor to Ebru Today TV and hosts her own radio show, Anger 911, on www.Anger911.net and Between You and God (iHeartRadio.com).
Janet's spoken at the United Nations, Notre Dame University, was a keynote speaker for the YWCA National Week Without Violence Campaign, and is a past board member for the World Addiction Foundation.
She's a former columnist for the Daily Record and contributing writer to Woman’s World Magazine, Living Solo, Prime Woman Magazine, and N.J. Family. Her name has appeared in print more than 100 million times, including The Wall Street Journal, Huffington Post, Alaska Business Monthly and more than 50 other publications.
A consultant to corporations including AT&T, U.S. Army, U.S. Postal Service, and Hoffman-LaRoche, Janet is N.J. State certified in domestic violence, an instructor at a battered women's shelter, and founder of The Antidote to Anger Group. She specializes in healing anger and conflict and creating inner peace and writes a weekly blog and bi-monthly newsletter.
Janet has authored 8 books, including the highly acclaimed The Secret Side of Anger (endorsed by NY Times bestselling author, Dr. Bernie Siegel).
Read what Marci Shimoff, New York Times bestselling author, says of Janet's latest book, The Great Truth; Shattering Life's Most Insidious Lies That Sabotage Your Happiness Along With the Revelation of Life's Sole Purpose:
"Janet dispels the lies and misconceptions many people have lived by and outlines a practical path to an extraordinary life beyond suffering. Written with honesty, clarity, sincerity, and humor, this book serves as a wonderful guide for anyone seeking a more enriching and fulfilling life.”
Dr. Bernie Siegel says, "All books of wisdom are meant to be read more than once. The Great Truth is one such book."