Do you recall or miss those good old days when lovemaking sessions resemble those Hitchcock movies which are filled with suspense and thrill? Do you feel that of late, having sex with your husband/lover starts to get boring and more like a chore? Are you wondering how to keep the situation from deteriorating into a sexless marriage?
Intimacy between lovers, no matter how powerful and passionate, has a tendency to fade over time. If disappointment and resentment over this diminished passion sets in, this can have adverse effects on the overall relationship. Let’s face it. There are going to be times when libido is low probably due to stress and this is perfectly normal. Here are some great ways to overcome sexual boredom and give your sex life some kick.
(1) Strengthen emotional intimacy
First of all, you have to realize that intimacy involves more than just sex. Emotional intimacy which is the basis for any truly meaningful sexual relationship is also equally important. Make sure that you and your partner/husband have affectionate moments throughout the day. This may consist of hugging, cuddling, holding hands, kissing, hugging or talking about the things that excite your partner/husband.
Knowing and doing those things that can arouse your partner/husband mentally will help you to work magic when the time comes. Paying attention to your partner’s daily life will be the key in discovering the things that can arouse him.
(2) Throw away your inhibitions
When sex has becomes boring, it is time to be more adventurous and straightforward with regards to what types of things you like to do. Try suggesting role-playing to your husband. List what turns you both on. Is it you as a cow-girl or him as Batman? It is being tied up or you doing the tying? Or other fantasies about celebrities, teachers, friends and people both of you barely know.
Compare your lists and his and decide on what both of you are willing to try. Next you shop around for costumes, accessories and other items to make your fantasy complete. After you have got what you want, you set a time to try it out.
You can do a debrief after the fantasy session to talk about what you both like/dislike and what you want next, such as the things to add or remove. Through role-playing, you may be able to strike a chord that sends your husband into a frenzy of sexual energy that he has yet tapped into.
(3) Change your sex routine
Predictability is a key ingredient that is often seen in many sexual relationships after a while. Through all your nights together, you have probably grown accustomed to certain techniques, touches and patterns that you believe are ideal for the sensations of both you and your husband. No matter how good you are at doing these, sex inevitably can get stale if you go through the same motion without making any changes. Therefore, injecting some element of spontaneity and uncertainties can make sex interesting.
If you typically make love at night, then it is high time to change your game plan. You can try morning or mid afternoon sex. If you are usually not aggressive when it comes to sex, change your behavior tonight. Take charge and seduce him; initiate foreplay, undress him at will and touch him differently than you have before. The key is to surprise him.
If you normally have sexual intercourse in the missionary position, something different like placing your legs over his shoulders in that position or riding on top of him is a huge stride in the way of spontaneity.
Taking your intimate relationship in a new direction has the potential to excite your husband. Excitement is an aspect of sex that often gets left behind in a committed relationship, but it can always be brought back to the forefront.
(4) Try having sex in a new location
Location can also play an interesting factor in making sex exciting. The key to plowing through sexual boredom is to move out of your comfort zone. You can try having sex in a car, giving him oral pleasure when both of you are stuck in a traffic jam, making love in the bathroom, public washroom, cinemas, library, dressing rooms, beaches, pools, cemetery, balconies, hiking trails, building elevator, etc. A change of scenery can do both of you a lot of good and get you to some of the best sex you have never experienced before.
Spicing up a stale sex routine needs cooperation, time and energy. However, this is worthwhile because in the process it allows you to communicate better with your partner and as a result deepen your bond, learn new things about each other when you think you know it all and become excited about sex again. Start doing this tonight – or even tomorrow morning.