Recently I´ve been experiencing tremendous resistance to writing – I talk about it and tell people that I´m fine once I get going but that I struggle to get going! I tell them I´m committed to writing every day and I mean it! Yet I haven´t been!
I´m brilliant at goal setting, action planning, using motivational techniques, developing good habits, maintaining vision and focus – I´m a very effective coach around getting into action. I understand the need to identify and explore the blocks and barriers to action that my clients face on a regular basis, how to invite my clients to explore these barriers (often disempowering beliefs or stories that they are carrying around), and to view them from a new perspective or a new angle. I love seeing the magic happen when a client releases a barrier in their mind and creates a new story of freedom and choice to be who they want to be and do what they want to do. I love how clients suddenly become energised and joyously move forward to take those actions that they desperately wanted to take but were previously frozen and procrastinating in the face of these big, bad barriers or blocks. I know this process so well, I´m a professional at seeing people through this process, one barrier at a time, one block at a time and yet I often forget that I need to go through exactly the same process to transform my own blocks.
On opening myself up to coaching around my writing block, my coach helped me to discover some of my underlying and disempowering beliefs as follows:
“I´m a man, so I should be strong and not need other people’s help”
“Action is the ONLY way to growth and transformation; naval gazing is just self-indulgent”
“Who the hell do I think I am to share my experiences with the world; who´s going to listen to me?”
“I love writing, it puts me ín the flow´ of my own inspiration, but I´m just a person who struggles, so I´d better not go there!”
Twenty minutes of coaching led me to identify these negative beliefs and perspectives I was carrying around about myself, about men and about the world. With the benefit of having someone else to reflect these back to me, I could see how these beliefs don´t serve me or anyone else! I was suddenly free to create new beliefs and new perspectives based on who I really am and who I want to be. I could see that it´s fantastic to have a great coach to support me. I could see that effective action often requires an internal shift and therefore introspection, especially when feeling blocked. I could see that who I am is a human being with experiences and skills that can really benefit others. I could see that it is fine for me to allow myself to be ´in the flow´and not to struggle in my life.
Among other things, I coach men that want to increase their dating skills and/or confidence. I´m effective because I´ve been there too – because I´ve opened up to trusting others, because I´ve accepted the help I needed to shift many of the blocks and barriers, one at a time, to heal the wounded parts of myself, to experience freedom and choice, to get into action and to become the authentic man that I want to be. Every time I experience a block or a barrier to what I know I want deep in my heart, I know there is a way to transform the block, to experience a new freedom and a new growth. What a lucky man I am – to experience this for myself and to experience such joy in being a part of this journey with others!
Joel is an ex-shy guy who knows what it's like to lack dating skills and self confidence, resulting in a single life that had it's upsides but was ultimately very lonely for long periods of time.
Joel did something about it when the status quo became just too painful. He engaged in a wide variety of self development programs and courses to develop his skills, confidence and dating strategy. Most importantly, he enjoyed the experience of dating many beautiful women, many of which he met using online dating websites. He knows what it takes to develop genuine confidence, to enjoy a steady stream of regular dates and to attract a fun and fulfilling relationship.
He supports men to:
improve their dating skills
build genuine confidence
generate a steady stream of regular dates
attract a fun and fulfilling relationship.
Joel is a Certified Professional Coach (CPC) and self development expert who helps men to improve their dating skills, build confidence, generate a steady stream of dates and attract a fun and fulfilling relationship...
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