To live as an asset, we must live fully in the present. Most of us live as if we were half alive. The Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh, observes that we walk around more dead-like than alive-like. He says we tend to live in the past where life has already happened or we live in the future where we don’t know what will happen and we ignore being in the moment where all of life happens. So in other words, we are not alive to life. To counteract this tendency, he teaches that we can learn to consciously pay attention to breathing in and breathing out as a simple and effective way to live the richness and bounty of the present moment. This will allow us to experience joy and peace in the moment where all joy is found. Just think about it. The last time you experienced pure joy and bliss, were you in the past, the future, or were you fully and deeply immersed in that exquisite present moment?
Truly allowing ourselves to be an asset to our families, communities, places of employment and those organizations to which we are a member, starts with observing how we are or are not being an asset in this present moment and in each and every moment going forward. The world is asking us to step up to the plate, do our best to hit a home run and be satisfied to reach first base. We are being called to be an asset now more than ever before. To do this we must commit to moving from our vampire tendencies of thinking small, such as: “what difference can my small contribution make?” – to doing our part to bring clarity to solutions by the light we shine and the commitments we make.
How would you choose to be more of an asset in your life?
You can begin the process of being more present to your moments right now by answering the following questions:
. Make a list of those things that trigger your Vampire Thinking©.
. What would change in your life if you started living as an asset?
. What would be available to you that you don’t have right now if you began to practice being an asset with everyone and every thing you touched, seeing yourself making ongoing contributions to those around you?
. How would your life change and how important would those changes be to you?
Vampire Thinking© is the opposite of being an asset. This kind of thinking brings fear and a negative perspective to opportunities to grow through relationships and new ventures. It drains away our good qualities, the extraordinary potential we possess, and the beauty we naturally are.
Being an asset means we get to focus on what we have to offer – the unique capabilities and capacities the people who care about us appreciate and love us for. We get to focus on creating joy and happiness in our lives and the lives of others. We avoid getting stuck in vampire traps that make us unworthy and much less than whom we truly are. Continuing to allow vampire thinking to take hold in our lives is like closing the casket to the light – it cuts off the illumination of what is possible for us.
People with ADHD are particularly vulnerable to Vampire Thinking© because of their affinity toward taking on blame and responsibility, whether or not is true, whether or not it is deserved. For them it is more important to not only catch themselves committing negative thinking, but also to find a positive solution to the issue in the form of a new system, practice or structure. People with ADHD often beat themselves up so much they miss the opportunity to problem solve. Vampire Thinking© will thrive and continue in any situation where it is not met with a firm and positive response to shift attention to being bigger and better people.
So what can you do to live your life more in the moment, do good work and breathe in confidence and positive intention? You could consciously switch from Vampire Thinking© whenever you notice your positive feelings are been overtaken by negative thinking! The road to Vampire Thinking© recovery happens by persistently building consciousness about when you do it and what the catalyst or triggers are that set if off.
In order to live more in the present moment and therefore learn to access more of yourself as an asset, here are some steps you can take:
. Write down the answers to the questions above.
. Make a list of your asset qualities (if you’re not sure, ask others. Oh heck, ask others anyway!)
. Take each asset quality and write how your life would change if you used it or just used it more often
. Do this process for 2 weeks consistently and faithfully and at the end of each week, write what you learned.
Based on your experience of the last 2 weeks, decide to include your favorite asset qualities in your life from now on. As you build the habit of using them and continue to reinforce them, you will be building a foundation for a future of being an asset to yourself and others. Your life will then transform in important and wonderful ways.
Carol Gignoux is well established as an expert within the ADHD coaching, consulting and training profession with over 35 years experience working with ADHD and over 16 years as a professional coach. Carol specializes in working with both teens and adults, with or without an ADHD diagnosis, who want to see better results in their academic, professional and personal life. In addition to being owner and CEO of ADD Insights, LLC, she has been an expert coach with the Hallowell Center, in Needham Massachusetts, for over 9 years.
Carol is a Licensed Certified Financial Coach and is trained as an Executive Coach. She has worked with executives and managers to create high functioning, successful businesses locally as well as nationwide. She was an active board member of the International Coaching Federation New England (ICF) for 3 years and is a founding board member of the Institute for the Advancement of ADHD Coaching that is the responsible certifying body for ADHD Coaches worldwide.
In addition, Carol is qualified as a Senior Certified ADHD Coach: SCAC. She is a member of T. Harv Eker’s Private Circle Club, and has completed many of his training programs on marketing, coaching, business building, and personal transformation. She is a master at leading instructional classes on: meditation, knowing your financial blueprint, and finding peace and security in uncertain times.
Carol has spoken locally and nationally on ADHD topics, and is a motivational speaker on living powerfully and honestly. She trains and supervises new ADHD coaches, and produces tele-classes and seminars on a variety of important and relevant topics to those with ADHD.
Presently, Carol is writing a book about the work she has done with clients to help them powerfully overcome the barriers that have held them back so they can purposefully and confidently move forward to a better future.
You can reach Carol at firstname.lastname@example.org