As a student of Astrology since 1975, I have listened to all the party talk about this sign and that sign and what they seem to be like. Of course, most people are talking about their particular Cancer, their most beloved buddy - Leo, or their hated parent - Virgo. When you hear people talk about a sun sign, you are most likely hearing about two or three (at the most) intimate, close (hated or loved) relationships they had with those signs. That's fine. That's the fun of it, and that's our short hand way of figuring out our loved ones and also chatting about astrology. Since this is an art, along with the blending of astro talk and ancient texts which speak about the signs, there is no absolute fixity about this topic. However, there are elements of the sun signs which apart from subjective experience do tend to shine a light the way we manifest our characters in this earthly realm. Check out Christofer's new website at: www.astrologygetalong.com.
The Point of this Article:
There are tricks to getting along. I emphasize getting along, and do not emphasize, the words persuade, dissuade, win and argument with, dominate or seduce. Those topics are for other times. Getting along is, in a sense, what life first asks us to do, and in a way, its the hardest thing we are asked to do, especially with certain sun signs.
I remember a date I had in college in which my date talked 95% of the time. I nodded, made sweet nonverbal grunts, chuckled and threw in looks of whimsy and lifted my eye brows a lot. It was a fun time, and I was not bored. I still remember it though, for the compliment I received. She said, "Chris you are such a good conversationalist." She did not say: "You listen well." That night I was "getting along". The effectiveness of my listening was that it was interpreted as talking. The point is to get along so that you will be viewed positively, and perhaps construed to be a different kind of person, maybe, than you really are. That's OK, social lubricants make the world go 'round. So, what I am trying to impart is that you want to "get along" so that you can be well thought of, and perhaps even positively reviewed as a friend, buddy, associate, subordinate or superior.
Cancer - "I am not a crab. Its just that the beach is the best place for my family." -
Cancer - the Crab, the Moonchild is a complex sun sign. The word "getting along" should really be emphasized here. They don't really care about being easy to get along with, unless they have a vested interest in you, the enterprise, the event. If they have this vested interest, they can charm you to the heights. But that's only if their family or their business is involved. The emphasis on crab is an easy image to bring a level of understanding to. They skitter along the beach in front of the ocean. They know how to gather resources in for their family. And they are smarter than all the other animals because at their front door, the most resplendent life-producing element on the planet is constantly dropping its tidal waves of vitality right there. The ocean -- giver of life.
The Moonchild is a statement about their predictable mood changes. Don't think of them as unpredictably moody. Think of them as predictably moody. They go from quarter moon, to half moon, then full, then waning. down to the new moon, then waxing. There is a level of sureness there. For their loved ones, they only have to wait. The trouble is you can't go up to a cancer and ask them what phase of the moon they are in, you just have to smile and wait, and see where they are at. But outwardly - They are like Betty Crocker. They can run a corporation from a phone booth. They are enterprising, hardworking, sweet moody people who are quite intense. That intensity though, is subsurface. They are not intense so you will be intimidated. They are intense because, they are intense. And they will do their best to hide that intensity; often with minimal success.
How do you get along with Cancer? Ask about the family. Ask about the business (often an entreprenuerial effort). Don't say anything negative about their family, or interview them as if you know a secret about their family. The little crab claw will come up and snip you on the nose. Admire Cancer's family and business efforts. But don't be too cloying or you will appear to be insincere. Cancer's hate artifice, insincerity, the appearance of manipulation and too much charm. If you are trying to get along with a Cancer, approach with an open-faced look of admiration and respect and don't be flippant. Cancer's hate flippant, if it seems disrespectful. Cancers are sincere. Love that about them. To get along with your Cancer loved one or friend, don't try to overinfluence them. If they embrace you as part of their family, half of what they do will be to fix your booboo, and alter your bad habits. Don't worry, that's love. Love them for it. Forget about if they don't have the "nice touch".
Leo - "My Claws are for combing my main, so I can look good basking in the Sun." -
Yes, Leos are great warriors and fighters, but just like the real lion, they are not into fighting as much as looking like they are great fighters. The Sun rules Leo the Lion, so it is not hard to get along with them. Shine your light of admiration on them and they will beam back at you with a gleamy appreciative smile. (Think Bill Clinton). Under the topic of getting along that will appear not to be an issue at all -- unless you cross them, or they think you crossed them, or disrespected them, or ignored them. Then Leo can bite your head off and spit it out with hot-blooded fury. Stay clear of the temper. That is rule number one for getting along with Leo. Admire, respect, and avoid offending. Leo is gracious and loving and they like to do things for people. If they look good while they are being grand, then that is all the better.
Leo likes leading. If they are not in charge, they try to be in charge, or look like they are next in line. Keep seeing a big generous smile that seems to say -- "I invented smiling and I am currently blessing you with its grandeur." Leos are fun. Leos are great at parties. Leos are good back slappers and love to have a "pride". It is rather ironic that the word "pride" has to do with the lion's offspring, because that is what they are "proud of their offspring". Their pride then is a reflection of their leadership and strength. When the Sun beams at you in the noon day heat, is their anything but warmth you are feeling?
Getting along with Leos comes in two phases: 1) Let them beam at you in the beginning and pay respects and beam back at them. 2) If you start thinking that all that glowing charm is insincere and you wince when it appears that they really don't care about you -- keep smiling and don't ask them for deep love. Just be content with the kind of love they give. They are not going to stop and pay particular attention to you, unless someone else is looking at the same time. Get used to that idea and then give them leaway and let them get the attention. They are good friends to have. They are very bad enemies to have. So do your best.
Virgos - "I am about perfection and service. Let me serve you my way and you will be fine." -
When you meet someone who is "virginal" you are meeting a collection of virtues which almost seem to oppose one another. There are not too many virginal people around these days, so imagine someone from an old movie or a novel. The Virgo, the Virgin, sees the world in a certain way and they see all the rules that go into that world. They try to keep them. They try to help other people to observe those rules and they will serve you with those attempts. The opositional ideas come when you don't see the world like they do. Then they criticize you.
Virginal "criticism" as such, does not exist for the Virgo. They are just righting you on the path. How can that be criticism for heaven's sake? You are on this path, you are about to go off the path, they are pulling you so you won't get hurt. That is not criticism. If you call it criticism then you just don't understand. That is the way the Virgo looks at things. They are not conflicted internally. Intenally, they continue to see the world with their clarity. All the confusion and the suffering out there is because people just don't get how to stay on the path.
Getting along with Virgos has to do with letting them love and serve you the way they want to. Do not push a different world view on them. Little bits of criticism will start firing off at you. Stop. Don't take offense. They are just righting your path. And the other benefit is that they are probably helping you or serving you in some way, so it is very difficult to get angry with them. As they nudge you a bit, and look down on you a bit, remember they are "virginal", they are doing their best to help you. If you come into disfavor with them, they will tend to label you in their virginal way, and label you as a "bad person". If you are a bad person, it does not mean that they hate you, and probably won't really harm you extremely, but they will probably up the temperature on the heat of their criticism. That's a sign that they may have given up on you just a little bit. But don't let that get you down. If a Virgo is important for you to get along with, its easy to get back in their graces as long as you start behaving better. Their purpose is to serve you in their perfection. Try to get back in that place and you will have a nice time being cared for by these virginal types. Just try to keep from disappointing them.
Check out Christofer's new website at: www.astrologygetalong.com.
Christofer French specializes in the belief, hope and instruction that it is possible to productively and harmoniously get along with people, in romance, or at work, or socializing, that you thought were difficult or even "impossible". He has written a book on Amazon: "How To Get Along With All Those Sun Signs". He is a Father of 4 and Grandfather of 6. He is happily married and ensconsed in Denver for over 30 years. Along with his Psy.D. and New Age approach, he holds the belief that our destiny on earth is to shine up our souls and improve our character, and the crucible of relationships is how it is done.