THE TIMID ON THE S. XXI
The Latin root of the word timid means "be afraid".
The people have used this word to
designate the timid because they are presented in society as people fearful.
The timid do not sell well to himself, but at short distance they earn much and may be dazzled
by his rich inner life, his creativity and his sensitivity.
FORMS OF SHYNESS
What is the underlying ideation on the timid?
What are the engines of socially fearful behaviour?
1-THE SHY WHO HAVE A LOW SELF ASSESSMENT
This low self-esteem acts unconsciously, automatically. The shy, rationally, he knows well
both his own worth and his place in the society.
If you have an intimate feel of your stupidity, of be inferior, useless ..., when you present yourself to others,
the trust will fail and you'll stay on the defensive "is not going to happen that your inferiority is in evidence."
----" Young, talk to I know you "---- Socrates said.
So if to speak or to act means to express what you are and what you are is just a person inferior
to others - because you feel that way not because you are well really - it makes sense to avoid
manifest and thus not make mistakes: do not talk, not act. I'd rather be a shy.
People act motivated by underlying thoughts, thoughts that often
unknown to the individual concerned, remain working for the psychologist.
2-A MORAL OF SLAVES
Shy people with low self-assessment, have easily feelings of shame
and humiliation. Both sentiments come into the consciousness of the I arbitrarily:
anything can be a source of embarrassment or humiliation in some individuals and the same thing can produce
indifference in others. It all depends on individual variables that can be activated by
education and culture. The shame and humiliation are in education and culture of the timid.
Nietzsche would say that such feelings are typical of a slave morality.
The winning mentality can not be curbed by such scruples. For the timid
the road to success is long and laborious ...
3-THE PHOBIC SHY
Life here reserve the timid a hoax: in addition to being shy, himself and against his will,
will announce to all his shyness in a really painful for the person ...
... this timid and only in social relations he blushes, babbles, sweats, suffers palpitations ...
All his effort to go unnoticed is coming down sharply.
The feeling of embarrassment is enormous. Here the timid is trapped. No output.
It only remains to count to 100 and ... wait for it to pass everything. No need to explain anything because
everything is clear to everyone. And after the crisis the discouragement: "Until next time." Because there will be
another next time ... It's like a natural stigma. But take note, dear reader, this is not over yet ...
This type of shyness causes embarrassment ... but the same embarrassment produces and increases timidity,
which in turn it recurs blush ... in an infernal cycle of feedback ...
It seems an invention of the devil. If ever you see this and you hear him say:
--- "Earth swallow me!”--- you do not panic.
4-THE SHY WITHOUT AFFETIVE ATTACHMENT
There are shy who do not develop affective relationships of attachment. It appears that in the mother-baby
relationship it is forme a relationship of imprinting that remains for life, a relationship of emotional attachment.
If this attachment does not come to set, the person goes through life without developing this attachment.
Even not with groups. These people are little skilled in social relationships and tend
to social retreat, to shyness. These are shy with few friends because they can not establish links,
without which, following contacts, nothing remains. So he can not make friends …
The repeated failures in social relationship make the person avoid some contacts
that he does not know get along. Soon he tries to avoid the social contacts and
when he has to do it will know again that he goes to another failure … and that’s how he tries to avoid
those contacts …: he has become a timid.
Until yesterday were particularly valued the physically strong men. Also have always aroused admiration who
in public operate well and make the best of themselves because to the audience they are grown. The shy left behind.
The visible power and social influence were heralds of success and the timid competed at a disadvantage in these areas.
In public the timid doubt, his thinking fades and shrinks, his yield is too low because he has not energy, ambition, desire.
He does not get a good contact I-you. In these circumstances the best option is to go unnoticed and make room for others.
In the XXI century the society of Science and Technology has given way to other winners, who are noted for their intelligence
and emotional balance. And here the timid can compete in good condition and even with some advantage ...
Some women are dazzled when they discover in the short distance to wonderful timid men,
adorned with a fascinating inner wealth.
6-VIRTUES OF THE SHY
After considering the timid problems, we have to value
all his virtues, which are many and sometimes important. Here is a simple enumeration
--- He usually has good capacity for introspection, is well known to himself.
--- He can see all his own experiences in others and develop empathy.
--- He can be a good counselor.
--- His feelings can be persistent, can be constant. He can complete his projects.
--- His lack of success in social relationships compensates his professional and personal success.
--- Usually get good scores on intelligence, measured by the Rorschach test, an this indicates
the high degree of his creative intelligence. Often come to be original.
The timid has before himself the vital challenge of compensating for his insecurity, getting achievements,
objectives, self-imposed targets…, which will get the social recognition that will improve
the self-assessment, fundamental to perform in that society feared, with most security and assurance.
Mikel Martinez Anton (1)
(1) psychologist, diagnosed schizoid, puts on this page available to all his knowledge and experiences.
Mikel Martinez, diagnosed schizoid.As a child was in a religious seminary, from 12 to 25 years; then graduated in Psychology by the University Complutense of Madrid. His condition has been permanent source of discomfort. Married, no children.
In April 2002 he received the diagnosis: Neurasthenia (ICD-10: F-48) and Personality Disorder Schizoid type (ICD-10: F 60.1) " [degree medium). At 52, with chronic fatigue is removed. He lives in the city where
was born: Bilbao, Spain. His long experience vital as schizoid is in the bottom of this page.