How often are you someplace enjoying yourself and someone walks in with the dark cloud hanging over their head? They can immediately pull the energy down with those around them.
I think of the character Ross in the movie Monsters Inc. She is the grumbly administrative person who has a nasally voice that whines at an irritable pitch that is like fingernails on a chalk board. Her glass is half empty and feels everyone around should have their glass half empty as well. Listening to her talk in her flat voice just sucks the energy out of the air around her.
I use to be that person. The sad part is that I was clueless that was the person I had become. The realization of my downer attitude came the day when I was listening to people discuss downer attitudes in general and a lot of what they were talking about resonated with my life at that time.
I decided to do a challenge with myself. For one week, I would make a conscious effort not to say anything negative. By being present and aware of what I was about to say, I was surprised to find by noon of my first day how much negative comments or thoughts I actually had. It was quite eye opening for me.
I had gotten so use to being negative that this became my normal behavior. I vowed to make it different. I quickly learned that having the desire to change and actually doing what I needed to do to change was going to be a challenged.
So many years of walking around with the little dark cloud over me took a lot of conscious time to think before I talked. It also taught me how human I am because I could easily slip back into my ‘normal’ behavior rather quickly; especially when I was tired.
Over time persistence paid off, I found the unexpected benefit of also having a spring in my step that wasn’t there before. Today, I can occasionally slip back into the negative thinking; but I have learned I just need to slow myself down, think before I speak and be present really listening to what and how I am saying something.
What I have found is that overtime; my half-empty glass viewpoint of life transitioned into a full glass and today it is overflowing with joy and abundance. It is amazing how my attitude comes into play in all aspects of my life.
So ask yourself, What kind of weather do you bring to a picnic?
Debbi Dickinson has been a single divorced mother for 9 years. She has a teenage daughter. Debbi is also a recovered alcoholic for 9 years who’s marriage didn’t survive her getting sober.
Newly sober and divorced she struggled with reclaiming her life and writes about her experiences in her blogs. Through her own mistakes, she shares her experience, strength and hope for the bright future which today she now enjoys.
She is intimately familiar with the struggles of single parents endure whether it’s answering our children’s questions about divorce, spending holidays alone or finding love again. She also tackles topics such as dealing with ex-spouse, setting boundaries and steps to reclaiming You!
Debbi is widely published including being regularly featured in Huffington Post.