Blended Families Articles

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Blended Families are families composed of parents or children from previous marriages or relationships that require just as much compassion and communication as a biological family. The following content relating to Blended Families have been reviewed by the editorial staff at SelfGrowth.com for quality and caliber.

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Divorce to Remarriage: What Happens When You Rush to Wed The Second Time Around - by Alyssa Johnson from Remarriage Success
Submitted on Oct 27, 2009 from Alyssa Johnson
50% of first marriages end in divorce. 75% of those divorcees will remarry. At least 60% of those remarriages will end in a re-divorce. Sobering statistics aren't they? But why are they this high? 50% of first marriages end in divorce I'm not even going to make a guess at the reason for this. ...
Views: 11
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3

Average: 3 (1 vote)

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Second Marriage Jitters - by Dr. Diana Weiss-Wisdom, Licensed Clinical Psychologist psy#12476
Submitted on Oct 25, 2009 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
The Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom My boyfriend and I are both divorced with children. We want to get married but we’re nervous about how to make it work. We both had terrible marriages the first go around. Now things will be even more challenging with the ...
Views: 16
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2

Average: 2 (2 votes)

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Thinking of Leaving? - by Adele Cornish BSW
Submitted on Oct 08, 2009 from Adele Cornish
I regularly receive emails from men and women worldwide who are seeking advice on their blended family. These come to me here in New Zealand, a small but famous country southeast of Australia. Sometimes these emails are from individuals saying they want to leave their relationship. Here I will ...
Views: 41
Ratings:
5

Average: 5 (3 votes)

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Why Your Stepkids Hate You and What You Can Do About It - by Angie Blackwell, CFLE, CPC
Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie Blackwell
I hear the same story time and again; “the kids liked me until I married their father.” So why is it that marriage often serves as the trigger, transforming once charming children into sullen stepkids? Many parents mistakenly believe that because the children are happy about the courtship ...
Views: 34
Ratings:
3.666665

Average: 3.7 (3 votes)

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Stepfamilies and Schools: Bridging The Gap - by Angie Blackwell, CFLE, CPC
Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie Blackwell
Fall is upon us and families everywhere are sending their children back to school. According to many estimates, at least half of those children are engaged in a step-relationship of some sort. Yet, educational institutions lack a clear and consistent approach to managing non-custodial parents ...
Views: 24
Ratings:
3.5

Average: 3.5 (2 votes)

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Roles Vs Place in The Family - by Michael Nunn
Submitted on Oct 01, 2009 from Michael Nunn
It is important to understand the difference between roles in the family (environment) and someone's place in the family. All too often, people are ostracized from a family due to their inability or unwillingness to fulfil certain roles within it. Sometimes that inability or unwillingness may be ...
Views: 43
Ratings:
3.25

Average: 3.3 (4 votes)

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Celebrate National Adoption Awareness Month with the Perfect Personalized Gift - by Diane Cullen Page
Submitted on Sep 30, 2009 from Diana Ennen
November is National Adoption Awareness Month, a time to be thankful for the joys adoption has brought to countless families and mindful of the many foster children in this country still waiting for families to call their own. If you or someone you know has been fortunate enough to build a family ...
Views: 29
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Handling a Sensitive Situation - by Dr. Diana Weiss-Wisdom, Licensed Clinical Psychologist psy#12476
Submitted on Sep 30, 2009 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
The Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families Handling a Sensitive Situation Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My father has been married numerous times and he consistently has terrible taste in women. Most recently, I ran into my current “stepmother” at a restaurant having a romantic dinner with ...
Views: 36
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Average: 2 (2 votes)

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Even Step parents Need Time for Themselves - by Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley
When you remarried and became a step parent you probably didn't realize how hard it would be to be a parent to a child that was not your own. It's tough- really tough,and you rarely receive any praise or thanks. You want to keep your spouse happy, their kids happy, your kids happy (if you have ...
Views: 38
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Average: 5 (1 vote)

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Signs of a Successful Blended Family - by Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley
1-You and your spouse have clear house rules that apply to all family members Yes, this means that house rules don’t change when you are tired, or your spouse is out of town. Both biological children and stepchildren all follow the same rules. It really does help when the parents also follow ...
Views: 42
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Average: 4 (2 votes)

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5 Golden Rules for Grandparents in a Blended Family - by Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley
You and your new spouse have married and blended your two families. Your parents are happy for you but unsure how to treat this new additions to the family. Here's a few golden rules to help them figure out how to respond to your newly blended family: 1- Treat every child the same Treat your ...
Views: 30
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4

Average: 4 (2 votes)

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Top Ten Rules for Divorced Parents - by Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley
1-All contact should be kept to a minimum One phone call a day is excessive, several text messages a day is extremely excessive. If you have a subject related to the kids- speak briefly and clearly about your expectations. Emails are better than phone calls, if your issue is not an ...
Views: 62
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Average: 5 (1 vote)

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Some Blended Families Just Don't Get Along - by Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley
Two adults marry and bring children into the new marriage. Some of these families get along wonderfully, and some families, who have been blended for years never accept each other as family. Here are some reasons a blended family may stay incompatible and not blend. The couple has children over ...
Views: 67
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Average: 5 (1 vote)

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Blended Family Wedding Vows! - by Jody Maley
Submitted on Aug 20, 2009 from Jody Maley
We went to a beautiful wedding a few weeks ago for a couple we have been friends with for quite awhile. My girlfriend had two children from a previous marriage (one boy, one girl) & had told us to feel free to bring our own children if we came. This was a nice change for us since we have six ...
Views: 74
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1

Average: 1 (1 vote)

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Stepfamilies: The Difficult Ex and the Issue of Badmouthing - by Joan Sarin, M.S.
Submitted on Aug 17, 2009 from Joan Sarin
The “difficult ex” - I think every divorced couple goes through at least a stage of complaining about this. I hear it in nearly every couple I work with, and I had my share of this pain too. It seemed to me for years that my husband’s ex-wife looked right through me as if I didn’t exist, ...
Views: 63
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2

Average: 2 (1 vote)

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***Managing Your Stepfamily - by Garrett Coan, the Official Guide to Anxiety
Submitted on Aug 13, 2009 from Garrett Coan
If you are a member of a stepfamily, you know how difficult it can be to integrate all of the new members and adjust to the new boundaries and rules. The following ideas may help you make a successful transition during this challenging process. Have patience. Establishing new families takes ...
Views: 61
Ratings:
3

Average: 3 (4 votes)

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Throw Out Those OLD TAPES! - by Dan Snell
Submitted on Aug 10, 2009 from Dan and Rebecca Snell
THROW OUT THOSE OLD TAPES, OLD STORIES, OLD MESSAGES! God doesn't make mistakes. YOU are not a mistake. Ask God to renew you. The past is past. Tomorrow is a fresh start! It's God's promise that His grace and mercy are new every morning! SCRIPTURE ASSURES US... 'Yet this I call to mind ...
Views: 72
Ratings:
2.5

Average: 2.5 (2 votes)

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Getting Along with Family - by Deborah Hill
Submitted on Aug 03, 2009 from Deborah Hill
Family members are often our greatest and most difficult ongoing teachers. A reader of my blog "Getting Along with Difficult People" (www.theawarenessinitiative.com/blog) asked how to get along with family members. I can't say that I've mastered the family conumdrum. In fact, I believe that ...
Views: 68
Ratings:
2.333335

Average: 2.3 (3 votes)

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It Takes Two to Tango - by Dr. Diana Weiss-Wisdom
Submitted on Aug 03, 2009 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, I’m so discouraged with my marriage that I almost don’t care anymore. I stayed in my first marriage because of the kids and now I’m remarried and doing the same thing again. I have two teenagers from my first marriage and a five year old now with my second wife. ...
Views: 71
Ratings:
2.166665

Average: 2.2 (6 votes)

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Stepfamily Activity #2 - Make a Book to Illustrate - by Evelyn Fielding
Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn Fielding
Being a step-parent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in ...
Views: 93
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Summer and Your Stepfamily - by Angie Blackwell, CFLE, CPC
Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie Blackwell
Stepfamilies are like snowflakes, no two are exactly the same. My stepkids live with me full time, but that isn't the case for many step-mothers. Many of you are probably spending a lot more time with your stepkids than you are used to doing. This post is dedicated to those of you that might be ...
Views: 129
Ratings:
4

Average: 4 (2 votes)

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The Oil of Life - by Gerald Anthony
Submitted on Jul 01, 2009 from Gerald Anthony
One day while taking a visit to the grocery store, I heard a customer in front of me say, “有没有油? (phonetic- yo may yo yo? Pinyin- you mei you you?)” As I waited in line, I watched as the cashier understood this complex logic of using the same words of pronunciation to form a question ...
Views: 146
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2

Average: 2 (3 votes)

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And Baby Makes... - by Rebecca Evans
Submitted on Jun 29, 2009 from Rebecca Evans
Every family is blended. Even when all the members are biologically linked, the addition of any new member requires special attention. And though new additions are mostly exciting times, blending can be an experience rich in mixed emotions, with joy and stress being at the top of the ...
Views: 102
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Men and Depression - by Dr. Diana Weiss-Wisdom
Submitted on Jun 11, 2009 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My thirty-two year old stepson has hit some hard times and has had to move in with us. He lost his job, lost his condo in foreclosure, and his girlfriend broke up with him. I’m very worried about him, but my husband thinks he has to just tough it out. My stepson stays ...
Views: 136
Ratings:
3

Average: 3 (1 vote)

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Electronic Free Activities For Families That Build Social Skills - by Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke
Submitted on Apr 29, 2009 from Judy Wright
If you are like most parents, grandparents, teachers today, you probably think that children are watching way too much television today. Not only are they sitting on their rear ends inside, when you can get them outside, they are playing video games on their cell-phones or other electronics. So, ...
Views: 131
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3

Average: 3 (1 vote)

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Families of the 21st Century - by Angie Blackwell, CFLE, CPC
Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie Blackwell
Families of the 21st Century come in all shapes and sizes. Divorce, remarriage, parenting out-of-wedlock and a host of other variables have turned nuclear families into the exception rather than the norm. As little as a half-century ago, children were typically raised in homes with two biological ...
Views: 147
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4

Average: 4 (3 votes)

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The Cure for Walking on Egg Shells - by Terri Amos-Britt
Submitted on Apr 24, 2009 from Terri Amos-Britt
I was astonished recently to discover that my 15-year-old daughter is struggling more than I had thought with living in our new home. I got re-married last summer and my daughter Kolbi had seemed to be adjusting very well. She’s always smiling and cutting up with my new hubby, Charlie, and me. ...
Views: 147
Ratings:
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Average: 4 (2 votes)

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The Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families - by Diana Weiss-Wisdom, Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist psy #12476
Submitted on Mar 20, 2009 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, I’m living with my boyfriend who has two kids under eleven years old. What do I do if I don’t like his kids? They are lazy and watch a lot of T.V.-even during the daytime. They don’t pick up after themselves or have any chores. I feel like I’m the maid! When I ...
Views: 105
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2

Average: 2 (1 vote)

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What to Do When Your Stepkids Disrespect You, Part 2 - by James Lehman
Submitted on Sep 09, 2009 from James Lehman
This is part 2 of a two-part series by James Lehman, MSW on Blended Families. In this article, James discusses the importance of respectful behavior in a blended family, and how parents can achieve this from all the children in the family. Over the years, many parents in blended families have ...
Views: 153
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4.5

Average: 4.5 (2 votes)

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Stepfamily Activity #66: Word of the Week - by Evelyn Fielding
Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn Fielding
Being a stepparent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in touch. ...
Views: 89
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Stepfamily Activity #1: Think of 30 Things You Have in Common - by Evelyn Fielding
Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn Fielding
Being a step-parent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in ...
Views: 94
Ratings:
3

Average: 3 (1 vote)

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“My Blended Family Won’t Blend--Help!” Part I - by James Lehman
Submitted on Sep 09, 2009 from James Lehman
“I don’t know what to do anymore,” said Jill, stepmother to two teen girls and mom to one biological son, aged 10. “My stepdaughters don’t respect me—I’m the ‘evil stepmother’ to them—and pretty much ignore whatever I say. And my son is constantly telling me that my husband ...
Views: 120
Ratings:
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Average: 4 (2 votes)

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For Stepmothers: Tough Lesson About Expectations - by Susan Wisdom, LPC
Submitted on Feb 19, 2009 from Susan Wisdom
Years ago, I married into a stepfamily My husband had full time custody of his kids and a demanding career, so guess who had the job of raising the kids! Cathy was almost 8 and WILLFUL. Naïve and full of expectations, I looked forward to buying her sweet, feminine dresses and doing girl ...
Views: 98
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A New Stepmom and Stepdaughter Find Healing for the Holidays - by Joan Sarin, M.S
Submitted on Jan 22, 2009 from Joan Sarin
Suzanne is the apple of her dad’s eye - 22, a beautiful, bright and successful architecture student who recently completed study in Europe for six months. Her parents’ divorce had been finalized shortly before she left, and she was dealing with it well - after all, she had a great ...
Views: 115
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Five Steps Forward, Not Looking Back - by Ron L. Deal
Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron Deal
Family life is full of challenges and rewards. Stepfamily life is no different. Sarah knows just what I mean: “My first marriage to John was a battle from the day it started. I wanted romance and an intimate union; he wanted independence and freedom. He finally found it with another woman. ...
Views: 101
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Cooperative Co-Parenting - by Ron L. Deal
Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron Deal
Blended families are often torn apart by between-home conflicts while children are caught in the middle of warring parents. Strengthen your blended family by improving your co-parenting relationship. The goal of co-parenting (at a minimum) is to contain the anger and conflict expressed between ...
Views: 107
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Average: 4 (2 votes)

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How to Cook a Blended Family - by Ron L. Deal
Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron Deal
Whether you realize it or not, you have a set of assumptions about how to cook your blended family. By that, I mean your approach to how your stepfamily ‘ought’ to come together. Brenda was cooking her family with a blender. “It happened again the other night,” she began. ...
Views: 89
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The Birds, The Bees, And Blended Families - by Diana Weiss-Wisdom, Ph.D.
Submitted on Oct 27, 2008 from Diana Weiss-Wisdom
How Can I Forgive him? On Blended Families Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My marriage of eighteen years ended three years ago because my husband had an affair with another woman. At first, I tried to forgive him and work the marriage out because we have a daughter together. But he lied again and I ...
Views: 81
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What Parents Can Learn From Puppies - by Emily Bouchard
Submitted on Oct 05, 2008 from Emily Bouchard
Why is it that new puppy owners won't hesitate to sign up for obedience training? They know that it is the easiest and best way to get rid of unwanted behaviors and to establish clear rules and boundaries with their puppy. They attend classes or hire a trainer to learn techniques to make life with ...
Views: 85
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Don't Like Your Step Kids? - by Emily Bouchard
Submitted on Oct 05, 2008 from Emily Bouchard
One challenge that many step parents face but few will admit is that they do not like one or more of their stepchildren. They love their partner, they love their kids, and they find themselves particularly challenged by the behaviors of their step kids. When a stepmom presents this problem to me, ...
Views: 135
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Blended Families Can Use Erasers - by Dan Snell, Co-Founder, The Bonded Family
Submitted on Jun 06, 2008 from Dan and Rebecca Snell
RIGHT NOW...CLOSE YOUR EYES FOR A MOMENT... PICTURE YOUR CHILDHOOD PAPERMATE 'PINK PEARL' ERASER... THAT SPECIAL SCENT IT HAD...EVEN HOW IT TASTED UPON NIBBLING... AND HOW MUCH YOU USED IT TO FIND YOUR 'FRESH START'. The famous childhood pink eraser. Yes ! We all know it well. Throughout the ...
Views: 103
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How Stepchildren Are Like Concrete Slabs - by Evelyn Fielding
Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn Fielding
How Stepchildren Are Like Concrete Slabs Imagine that you came home from work one day and discovered your spouse had poured a 20x30 concrete slab in the front yard. One corner of this slab sticks into the driveway; another corner took out a few hostas. And it’s a quadrilateral, not a ...
Views: 105
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Blended Families Can Be Successful - by Judy H. Wright
Submitted on Nov 07, 2007 from Judy Wright
Many families today are blending members from past relationships. It would be easy to give up when faced with all the conflicting methods of parenting and discipline that come to a family who has joined forces together. As I was doing research for a recent book, I interviewed a young counselor at ...
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Loving A Stepchild - by Judy H. Wright
Submitted on Nov 06, 2007 from Judy Wright
Loving your step- child can be both simple and hard. It is not enough for parents, step parents and extended family to feel a deep glow of love for the children in your circle of influence. You must convey that feeling into a message that is heard, felt and integrated by the child. Children need ...
Views: 106
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Sex in the Remarriage - The Most Important Ingredient for a Strong Step Family - by Alyssa Johnson
Submitted on Sep 05, 2007 from Alyssa Johnson
In first marriages, the old saying is to put a bean in a jar every time you make love during the first year. For every year thereafter, take one out every time you make love. By the end of your marriage, it is said that the jar will finally be empty. It's a nice wives tale, but not necessarily as ...
Views: 103
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Step Families & Remarriage - More Great Ways to Ruin a Step Family - by Alyssa Johnson
Submitted on Aug 27, 2007 from Alyssa Johnson
Step families are the fastest growing family in America. While that may be the case, there is a lot of confusion about how they function and what they look like. This confusion, unfortunately, leads to anger and heartbreak as these new families quickly realize just how hard it is to be a step ...
Views: 110
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Step Families & Remarriage - Great Ways to Ruin a Step Family - by Alyssa Johnson
Submitted on Jul 21, 2007 from Alyssa Johnson
Step families are hard. Anyone who says different doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Unfortunately the Brady Bunch just isn’t a reality. Those kids didn’t have two homes they were going back and forth to. They didn’t have parents who were trying to co-parent with an ex-spouse. And ...
Views: 123
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National Stepfamily Day - A Recognition of Family - by Clergy Services, Inc./Amy Knowlden
Submitted on Jun 02, 2007 from SelfGrowth.com admin
According to the Stepfamily Association of America, 1 out of 3 Americans is a stepparent, stepchild, or other member of a stepfamily. With approximately 1300 new stepfamilies being formed every day in the U.S. and the prediction that by 2010 there will be more stepfamilies in the U.S. than any ...
Views: 107
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BUILDING TRUST AND ACCEPTANCE WITH STEPCHILDREN - by Waln K. Brown, Ph.D.
Submitted on Apr 30, 2007 from Dr. Waln Brown
BUILDING TRUST AND ACCEPTANCE WITH STEPCHILDREN By Waln K. Brown, Ph.D. William Gladden Foundation If you are having trouble building a relationship with your stepchildren, do not despair. You are not alone. Nearly 50% of all families in the United States are stepfamilies. Many of these ...
Views: 118
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STEPPARENTS: THE MARRIAGE - by Judi Chapman
Submitted on Apr 27, 2007 from SelfGrowth.com admin
How often have we witnessed -- or been part of -- a situation where one parent hollers to the other, "you ALWAYS do that and I'm sick of it!" Probably quite frequently. How often have you seen it lead to a quiet, mature discussion of the problem? Not very often. For a stepparent, a conversation ...
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