Self Improvement Newsletter
Issue # 463, July 24-25, 2007
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Improvement Newsletter, Click here!Please Visit Our Sponsors
Self Improvement Newsletter
Issue # 463, July 24-25, 2007
FREE Self
Improvement Newsletter, Click here!
Please Visit Our Sponsors
* Self Improvement and Personal Growth Weekly Newsletter
*
Issue # 463, Week of July 24-25, 2007
Publisher: David Riklan -
http://www.SelfGrowth.com
In this issue:
-- Quotes of the Week
-- Personal Growth Products and Services
-- Article: The Freedom and Power of Accountability By Jay Fiset
-- Article: Bad Choices Can Lead to Good Ones By Deborah Brown-Volkman
-- Book Review: First Things First By Stephen R. Covey, A. Roger Merrill,
Rebecca R. Merrill
-- Brief News of the World
-- How to Subscribe and Unsubscribe from this Newsletter
Current Subscribers 259,162 subscribers
Removal instructions are listed at the end of the newsletter.
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*** Quotes of the Week ***
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Being right half the time beats being half-right all the time. Malcolm S.
Forbes, 1917-1990, American Publisher
I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must
know it has got to get down to work. Pearl S. Buck, 1892-1973, American
Novelist and Pulitzer Prize Winner
Great minds must be ready not only to take opportunities, but to make them.
Charles Caleb Colton, 1780-1832, British Author and Clergyman
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*** Article: The Freedom and Power of Accountability By Jay Fiset ***
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Why an article on accountability? While hardly a new topic, the concept is
widely maligned, misunderstood, or missed completely. Until we are willing to
live our lives from an accountable perspective, there are always excuses as to
why we can't, why our lives don't work, and why we should not even try.
Let's start at the beginning. The 3 basic levels of accountability are, briefly:
1) Accountability for our feelings: I do not have choice regarding all the
events in my life, but I always have choice in how I respond to those events.
2) Accountability for our feelings, choices, and lessons: I co-create the
experiences in my life. I choose not to waste precious energy blaming myself or
anyone else. I honestly examine all of MY choices that co-create the experiences
in my life, and I choose to learn valuable lessons from everything I experience.
3) Spiritual accountability for everything: This level of accountability is best
framed by the statement, "I chose my parents, and I will choose the time, place,
and method of my death." The implications are many, but simply put, we are
spiritual beings having a human experience. The experiences we co-create here on
earth have some purpose or lesson for us, both at a human and spiritual level.
It is our job while we are here to discover that purpose, learn, and evolve.
Accountability is a massive concept; however there are some foundational ideas
that assist in its integration:
1) Accountability is not "right"; it is simply a way of viewing our lives and
experiences that helps us to let go of the past and move forward in life.
2) Accountability is an internal experience; no one can make you accountable
3) Accountability is the foundation of freedom and personal power
In defining accountability, it is sometimes easier to start with what
accountability is NOT, as our society is very invested in the model of blame. If
something is "wrong," then there must be someone to blame; someone or something
is responsible. Accountability is NOT SELF-BLAME. Too many people believe that
being accountable is being responsible, and most have the experience of blame
attached to being responsible.
The first and most important step in understanding and applying accountability
is accepting the concept there is NO BLAME. This idea, while it sounds simple,
is really quite radical, and doesn't fit within belief systems held by most.
If the concept of no blame is difficult for you, simply ask yourself this
question, "What if there is no one to blame?" How would that impact your life?
How could it assist you and free up your energy? Would this idea support you to
forgive yourself and others? Simply releasing the energy of blame can transform
your life.
Become conscious of where in your life you blame others and you blame yourself.
If possible, let go of the blame and see how it feels.
A concept that allowed me to stop blaming is: We all have made the best possible
choices we knew how to make when those choices were made, with the information
we had at the time. (Information means our entire development as human beings,
mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually).
The truth is, for most people, this is exceptionally difficult to accept. We
have been hard wired to blame, and there must be someone or something at fault.
If we begin to release this idea, we can let go of the emotional energy and
weight of blame in our lives. What we are aiming for is the experience of truly
accepting what is.
Regardless of how much we feel blame may be justified in a given circumstance, a
more important question is, "Is it your wisest choice to consume your precious
life energy blaming yourself or others?"
If we choose to blame, we project our life experiences outside of ourselves
where we have no power, or internally where we diminish and demean ourselves.
From either of these positions, we cannot learn or move forward in life. We can
only stay stuck.
Next, ask the question, "What is my life lesson in this experience?" Only after
answering this question can we really move forward to the power of
accountability. The key to ongoing empowerment and personal evolution is
interpreting and applying the lessons in our lives.
Practice answering the question "What choices did I make to co-create this
experience in my life?" Answer the question in areas of your life where things
are going great and areas where things are not terrific. There are significant
lessons in both circumstances.
Now the most important aspect of truly being accountable is the application of
the lesson(s). Accountability has become a much more commonly used term over the
past 15 years. Many people now profess to be accountable and, even more
entertaining, to taking accountability. I always wonder, taking it from where?
The grounding of taking accountability is usually still related to the weight of
responsibility and blame, yet the results in their lives never seem to shift.
Here is the measure of true accountability. Our results in life change because
we apply the lessons of our life. It is a simple and powerful measure. If our
results do not change, we have not learned the lessons and keep recreating
similar experiences over and over again.
If we choose to accept (and apply) the concept of accountability, then no matter
the circumstance, we can choose to accept, learn, and grow, regardless of how
challenging it may be.
The final component of accountability is the capacity to attach meaning and
significance to the events in our lives in a manner that supports us to move
forward, evolve, and more consciously engage in our lives.
About the Author:
Jay Fiset is a powerful speaker, a risk-taker, and a leader who reaches his
goals by assisting others to achieve theirs. He has over 20,000 hours experience
conducting personal development seminars. His company, Personal Best Seminars,
is a leading seminar company that provides workshops promoting self-awareness
and stimulating personal growth. Jay enjoys living life to the fullest. He
continually challenges himself and expands his comfort zone by participating in
such activities as bungee jumping, sky diving, and fire walking.
His interests include television and video production, restoring vintage sports
cars, running, Macintosh computers, real estate investing, and learning new
technology.
He is committed to personal development, conscious parenting, lifelong learning,
the end of extreme poverty, community contribution, and discovery.
Check out the Experts page for Jay Fiset, the Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to
Personal Accountability:
http://www.selfgrowth.com/experts/jay_fiset.html
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*** Article: Bad Choices Can Lead to Good Ones By Deborah Brown-Volkman ***
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Your career is a series of choices. Some are good, and some are not so good. But
either way, you are the person doing the choosing. At times it may feel like you
have no choice, or someone else is making the choices for you, but the truth is
you have more power over what you choose than you think you do.
What's going on in your career? Frustration? Boredom? Exhaustion? Things we all
deal with in today's workplace. (It's good to know that you are not alone.)
If your career is not where you want it to be, it's up to you to do something
about it. The old clichι, "Good things come to those who wait," hurts more than
it helps. It gets you off the hook because you believe things will happen on
their own over time. Action is what gets results. Not waiting.
So what are you choosing? Are you choosing to work on making more money or
quietly wishing a raise will come to you? Are you choosing to update your resume
or letting being busy prevail? Are you actively choosing to discover what your
true passion is, or are you hoping the answer will magically appear? The choices
you make today will determine whether you are happy or not tomorrow.
In order to go forward, sometimes you have to go back. Once you can accept where
you have been, then you can make plans to move forward. Look at your career.
Where have your choices led you?
1. Have Bad Choices Led To Regret?
Everyone has something in their career they wish they'd done differently. Maybe
you misspoke in an interview or a meeting and you blew an opportunity. Maybe you
could have negotiated a bigger salary, but you did not. Maybe you ran into
someone in your career who could have helped you move to greater heights, but
you failed to ask for help. Again, know that you are not alone. Bad choices are
something we all share. It's not what happens to you in your career that
matters, but how you recover from it. Have you moved on, or are you replaying
every moment over again in your mind? Replays are for sports, not for your
career. Let it go so you can move on to something better.
2. Have Bad Choices Led To A Bad Attitude?
Are you fun to be around? Or do people ignore you? What kind of vibe are you
sending at work or on interviews? Believe you are hiding a bad attitude? Your
belief is wrong. People can pick it up from a mile away. No one can hide
unhappiness or anger. You may think that you have a right to be gloomy, but the
person you are hurting the most is you. No one cares that you are upset. They do
care that you are being difficult. Want to shake things up in your career and
see real results? Become a more positive person. This one act alone can
transform your career.
3. Have Bad Choices Led To Fear?
What are you afraid of? Afraid to ask for more money or resources? Afraid to
speak up in meetings? Afraid to call people you know to see if they have a job
opportunity for you? Afraid to go after your passion? Fear is normal. You
wouldn't be alive without it. But there is a difference between being afraid and
letting fear paralyze you. Even though you are busy, you know yourself pretty
well. You know when fear is getting in the way. The question is... what will you
do about it? Will you let fear win or not?
4. Start Making Good Choices
Until you make better choices, your old choices will continue to haunt you.
Start today by making one good choice. One choice will lead to two and so on.
You have to start somewhere, so start where you are right now. Good choices made
over time will lead you to a more fulfilling career.
So, what do you say? You only have one life to live, so it might as well be a
life you love!
About the Author:
Deborah Brown-Volkman is the President of Surpass Your Dreams, Inc., a
successful career, life, and mentor coaching company that works with Senior
Executives, Vice Presidents, and Managers who are looking for new career
opportunities or seek to become more productive in their current role. She is
the author of "Coach Yourself To A New Career" and "How To Feel Great At Work
Every Day." Deborah can be reached at
http://www.surpassyourdreams.com,
http://www.career-escape-program.com,
info@surpassyourdreams.com or at
(631) 874-2877.
Check out the Experts page for Deborah Brown-Volkman:
http://www.selfgrowth.com/experts/deborah_brown_volkman.html
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*** Book Review: First Things First By Stephen R. Covey, A. Roger Merrill,
Rebecca R. Merrill ***
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What are the most important things in your life? Do they get as much care,
emphasis, and time as you'd like to give them? Far from the traditional
"be-more-efficient" time-management book with shortcut techniques, "First Things
First" shows you how to look at your use of time totally differently. Using this
book will help you create balance between your personal and professional
responsibilities by putting first things first and acting on them. Covey teaches
an organizing process that helps you categorize tasks so you focus on what is
important, not merely what is urgent. First you divide tasks into these
quadrants:
1. Important and Urgent (crises, deadline-driven projects)
2. Important, Not Urgent (preparation, prevention, planning, relationships)
3. Urgent, Not Important (interruptions, many pressing matters)
4. Not Urgent, Not Important (trivia, time wasters)
Most people spend most of their time in quadrants 1 and 3, while quadrant 2 is
where quality happens. "Doing more things faster is no substitute for doing the
right things," says Covey. He points you toward the real human needs--"to live,
to love, to learn, to leave a legacy"--and how to balance your time to achieve a
meaningful life, not just get things done. --Joan Price
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