Self Improvement Newsletter
Issue # 521, September 2-3, 2008

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* Self Improvement and Personal Growth Weekly Newsletter *
Issue # 521, Week of September 2-3, 2008
Publisher:  David Riklan - http://www.SelfGrowth.com

In this issue:

-- Quotes of the Week
-- Recommended Product of the Week
-- Article:  Do You Truly Follow Your Heart...or Someone Else's Head? - By Sedona.com
-- Article:  Develop the Power of Presence to Compel Attention When You Speak in Groups - By Sandra Zimmer
-- Book Review:  Get the Life You Want: The Secrets to Quick and Lasting Life Change with Neuro-Linguistic Programming - By Richard Bandler
-- Brief News of the World
-- How to Subscribe and Unsubscribe from this Newsletter

Current Subscribers - 270,608 subscribers
Removal instructions are listed at the end of the newsletter.


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*** Quotes of the Week ***
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Never let a day pass that you will have cause to say, I will do better tomorrow. - Brigham Young, 1801-1877, American Religious Leader

Even a mistake may turn out to be the one thing necessary to a worthwhile achievement. - Henry Ford, 1863-1947, American Industrialist and Founder of Ford Motor Company

An acquaintance that begins with a compliment is sure to develop into a real friendship. - Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900, Irish Dramatist/Novelist/Poet

 
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*** Recommended Product of the Week ***
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** Article:  Do You Truly Follow Your Heart...or Someone Else's Head? - By Sedona.com ***
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You know how it feels when you truly follow your heart. Every inch of your body -- the very fabric of your soul -- feels alive. And even if your head is telling you no, you do it anyway because something bigger, something more primal, is telling you yes.

"You know when you are following your heart because it will feel right even if your mind is uncomfortable," says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and director of training of Sedona Training Associates. "You will feel an openness and aliveness as you follow what is true for you."

Now, when's the last time you followed that feeling? Really threw caution to the wind and went full speed ahead for an opportunity, relationship, or experience that made you tingle with excitement? Been awhile?

For most adults, the answer is yes. As kids, though, we did it all the time.

People believe in beings in their youth like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny not because it really made sense, but because it felt right to their hearts. We have probably all made pledges to remain "best friends forever" not because we thought it out, but because we felt it should be so. And we caught fireflies, had lemonade stands, and played endless hours of tag...not because we thought we should, but because we couldn't imagine life without it.

As we grow older, though, our heads often get in the way. They're filled with "reasons we shouldn't," "things that could go wrong," or "more important things to do." And, perhaps worst of all, they become very susceptible to the opinions of others, including those of society.

Whose Life Is It Anyway?

This is the question you need to ask yourself. Whose life is it that you are living?

Think a moment before you answer. Are you working in a job that makes sense or that you love? Do you surround yourself with people who you should associate with, or those that you adore? And are you living your life the way that you want to, or the way that someone else -- your parents, your spouse, society -- wants you to?

If you can't answer the original question with a heartfelt "MINE!" then you got to this article just in time. What follows is the secret to living YOUR life YOUR way.

Learning to Follow Your Heart

Following your heart is a two-step process. The first step is letting go of your need for approval. This opens the door to things like splashing barefoot through a fountain, giggling at completely inappropriate times, and striking up conversations with total strangers. Because, you see, once you stop caring about what other people think of you, you start caring about what you really want to do.

The second step of the process, then, is learning what it is you truly want. This can be tricky because society conditions us to want certain things (from material possessions to life arrangements). In reality, you may want none of those, or you may want them all. Either way is fine; the key is to notice and realize what your heart is telling you. If you listen, you can do no wrong.

"If you are feeling some doubt it does not mean that the message should not be trusted," Dwoskin says. "It simply means that it is time to let go. When you are wondering whether or not a message is coming from your heart simply let go."

*****

The Sedona Method, a simple but powerful tool, shows you how to release the doubts that are clouding the path to your heart, or your inner awareness and spiritual being.

"As you let go you will gain greater clarity," says Dwoskin. "If the message is coming from your heart it will simply get quieter and clearer, and if it is coming from your mind it will just dissolve."

About the Author:
Hale Dwoskin is the author of the New York Times best seller "The Sedona Method," and he is one of the 24 teachers from the movie "The Secret." Hale is the CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates, an organization headquartered in Sedona, Arizona. He has trained thousands of people worldwide to release limiting and unwanted thoughts and feelings using the powerful Sedona Method techniques. To learn how the Sedona Method can help YOU, visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/products/sedona.html

Check out the Experts page for Hale Dwoskin, the Official Guide to Anger Management, Anxiety, and Happiness & Self Improvement.

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*** Article:  Develop the Power of Presence to Compel Attention When You Speak in Groups - By Sandra Zimmer ***
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Everyone is talking about the secret of the Law of Attraction to draw the things you want into your life. I want to talk about a different power of attraction -- the power of presence to compel attention when you speak in groups or in front of others. This power of attraction is the ability to receive the flow of attention from listeners so that others are attracted to pay attention to you when you speak.

When you speak in groups or in front of groups, can you sense that you make authentic connection and that listeners are held rapt with attention? If not, you may want to develop the power of presence to help you attract and compel the attention of others. When you are present, you are able to hold the focus of attention of others easily.

Presence is a sense of being here now, in this moment. All aspects of your being -- physical, mental, and emotional -- are focused together on what is happening now. When you are so focused, you exude a strong presence that others can sense and that attracts their focus of attention to you.

Often, when people speak in groups or in front of others, their attention is split so that their presence is not strong enough to hold attention. While trying to deliver an important message, you may have had the experience of feeling physically tense, experiencing emotional anxiety, and thinking you may not say it right. Your attention split in several directions. No wonder people do not seem to be paying attention!

Here are some core concepts that will help you develop presence and create a quality of connection that attracts or receives the flow of others' attention.

1. Ground your body to experience the sensation of presence. Get out of you head and get into your body. Cultivate the ability to relax your mental attention down through your body all the way to your feet. Imagine you melt energy out of your head and let it flow down to fill your entire body. Grounding your body creates a sense of confidence, strength, stability, and the awareness of being in the present moment. (For an aid in grounding, check out my Grounding Exercise CD or downloadable audio.)

2. Find out where you tense and block energy in your body when you become the center of attention. If you experience fear and anxiety to speak in front of others, you have the potential to be among the most impacting speakers. That is because you have strong feelings! Your feelings are up to the surface where they can be used to create genuine emotional connection with others. Fear of public speaking is just passion energy that is blocked in the body and not being allowed to flow freely. Explore the tension of being the center of attention with curiosity rather than self-judgment. Give yourself permission to feel the tension and experience it until it releases into flow.

3. Let others see your real self rather than projecting an image you want them to see. Let go of performing for them and be with them. Create a style of speaking based on being who you really are rather than who you think you should be. The more authentic you are, the more people are drawn to you.

4. Integrate your real, "in the moment" feelings into the communication or presentation without self-judgment. Be real with them so something real can happen in the space between you. Don't be afraid to say, "You know, every time I speak in groups I feel tension because I want to do a good job of communicating with you." This creates intimacy with your listeners.

5. Breathe. I mean really breathe. Take deep breaths, fast breaths, slow breaths, until you relax. Breathing helps your brain oxygenize and relaxes you body. It expands your internal sense of self so you experience a meditator's high, a sense of being high on life energy. Spend 10 to 15 minutes breathing before your presentation.

6. Receive your "audience" to create electricity. Use "soft eyes" when making eye contact. Use your eyes to look gently on people. Imagine you are drinking listeners in through your eyes. Open yourself to take people in and receive the flow of their attention. This reduces your resistance to them and draws them to you magnetically. Don't worry about being pumped up for your audience. Instead, allow the connection and electricity to build as you receive them.

7. Let go of perfectionism. Give up the idea that you have to be perfect or say it perfectly in order to be effective. Effectiveness is not about your performance; it is what happens to your listeners as a result of who you are being with them. If they are changed for the better by your communication, then you have been effective, and it is enough.

8. Be there for them. Make your communication or presentation about serving them, not about your performance. Put yourself in the position of being there to share your experience, knowledge, and wisdom.

9. Choose to love them rather than worrying if they will like you. Extend your love and acceptance to them and give them permission to receive it or not. This is a very powerful space from which to communicate.

10. Talk one-to-one, even in a large group. Make connection with one person at a time. Have a conversation with one person, then another, then another. When you do so, everyone feels that you are connecting with them personally.

About the Author:
Sandra Zimmer works with high achievers who are struggling with communication and who may be uncomfortable speaking in groups. She helps them transform the way they express who they are so they feel confident to share their ideas, insights, and expertise. Sandra has developed the Zimmer Method for Authentic Communication. Her method guides people through a process that connects them to their natural abilities to express themselves when they speak, sell, and persuade. Visit http://www.self-expression.com

Check out the Experts page for Sandra Zimmer, the Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to Stage Fright and Overcoming Stage Fright.

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*** Book Review:  Get the Life You Want: The Secrets to Quick and Lasting Life Change with Neuro-Linguistic Programming - By Richard Bandler ***
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When people and therapists alike have a problem they can't fix, they call Richard Bandler because he delivers -- often with miraculous results. Hailed as one of the greatest geniuses in the field of personal change, and the father of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Richard Bandler has helped tens of thousands of people around the globe rid themselves of 'incurable' phobias, fears, anxieties, addictions, negative habits, and past traumas -- often in a single session.

"Get the Life You Want" is Richard Bandler at his best, sharing his remarkable insights, his controversial signature wit, and more than thirty-five time-tested NLP techniques that will bring about quick and lasting change in every area of your life, from breaking free of toxic or non-productive relationships, to delivering business presentations without a knot in your stomach, to quitting smoking for good.

By putting Bandler's techniques into practice, you can literally change your brain chemistry without expensive drugs or endless therapy sessions; most of all, you can finally learn how to "run your own brain" instead of rehashing the same problems.

Check out the Experts page for Richard Bandler.

*****

The list price of this book is $19.95. To purchase it from Amazon.com for $13.57, a 32% discount, go here.

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*** Brief News of the World ***
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Positive:

* Jerry Lewis' telethon collects record $65 million *

Jerry Lewis raised a record $65 million for the Muscular Dystrophy Association in his annual Labor Day telethon, a benefit that also made a pitch for those inconvenienced by Hurricane Gustav. This year's 22-hour telethon added a special plea for MDA-registered families forced to leave their homes because of the hurricane, which made landfall Monday in Louisiana. The storm affected nearly 5,000 MDA families needing services in their new location, the organization said. Lewis also urged viewers to contribute to the Salvation Army's emergency disaster services. (Click here for complete news story)

* $3 Million Lottery Win Donated to Church *

A New York pastor says one of his congregants donated a winning lottery ticket worth $3 million to his church. Pastor Bertrand Crabbe of the True North Community Church in Port Jefferson says the donor, who asked to remain anonymous, donated the "Ba Da Bling" scratch-off ticket immediately after realizing he won. Crabb says the donor said "This was why God put the ticket in his hands." (Click here for complete news story)

* Phelps to use $1 million bonus to start charity: The swimmer who made splash in Beijing is big advocate of pool safety *

Michael Phelps, the most decorated Olympian in history, will use the $1 million bonus he earned from Speedo for tying Mark Spitz's record of seven gold medals to start his own foundation. Appearing on TODAY, Phelps announced that the Michael Phelps Foundation will distribute his prize money to various charitable programs to promote water safety and encourage youth swimming. "This is a way for me to really help to grow the sport," Phelps told TODAY co-host Matt Lauer on Tuesday. (Click here for complete news story)

** For more positive news, please visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/news.html

Other:

* Zoo Atlanta Visitors Flock to Welcome Panda Cub: Zoo Atlanta Buzzing with Baby Talk as Visitors Flock to Welcome New Giant Panda Cub *

Visitors flocked to welcome the only panda born at a U.S. zoo so far this year and watch mother and child on a live video feed at Zoo Atlanta Monday. The tiny, hairless cub -- which is the size of a stick of butter -- is sequestered with her mom, Lun Lun, in the zoo's birthing den, where they will remain for several months. The bundle of joy was born Saturday, just a week before the second birthday of Mei Lan, the zoo's first panda cub. (Click here for complete news story)

* U.S. workers can expect skimpy raises in 2009: Seventh year of flat growth; bigger bump seen from merit pay -- study *

U.S. workers can expect skimpy raises in their base salaries next year, but top performers may still fatten their paychecks with merit compensation. A study released Tuesday by Hewitt Associates, a human resources consulting firm, found base pay will rise by 3.8 percent in 2009, marking the seventh consecutive year of flat growth. One-time performance-based pay, however, is expected to grow by 10.6 percent. That's down slightly from 10.8 percent this year and 11.8 percent in 2007. (Click here for complete news story)

* Docs Tell How to Help Avoid Cold and Flu at School: Handwashing, Vaccinations Among Top Tips *

As the new school year begins, children trek off to school, returning in the evening with their artwork, stories about their day -- and possibly a few germs and viruses to share with the family. "It's never too early to worry about your child picking up germs in day care," said Dr. Tanya Remer Altmann, a pediatrician with the Community Pediatric Medical Group in Westlake, Calif. "In fact, the first day of day care they can catch a cold." (Click here for complete news story)

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