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After a relationship break down the painful event remains stored in each partner as a memory that has embedded within it energy that hinders one's ability to return to a new relationship easily or at all. For many this outcome feels severely limiting. Did you know that such an outcome is not ... Views: 21
When a relationship collapses for whatever reason most people take it quite hard and fall prey to many seemingly "normal" feelings such as sadness, grief, anger, regret, rage, a deep sense of loss, low self worth, feelings of emptiness and loneliness, fears of being alone, low self esteem and so ... Views: 18
Old hurts associated with memories of past disappointments have many negative consequences on a person's life. In short they severely constrict the potential of that individual ever achieving a state of joy and fulfillment.
When one experiences a disappointing or hurtful event, be it in one's ... Views: 25
Are you coming off a bad relationship? Are you still feeling the emotional wounds from your ex? Do you have old deeply buried wounds from previously failed relationships? Well if you've answered yes to any one of these then I can guarantee that these scars will, whether you like it or not, ... Views: 37
The pain, sadness and grief that go with a recent divorce can often make it extremely difficult to clearly and confidently move forward into one's awaiting new life. In fact many individuals have been told that it often takes months to years to truly recover from such a negative event. Is this ... Views: 51
Do you know that the length of time it takes to completely get over a breakup can be anywhere from 3 years to forever? Do you know that this time period can be shortened to a matter of days to weeks? Do you know that the single greatest impediment to letting go of the negative feelings ... Views: 52
Loss of A Loved One: The Journey of Grief
Since no two relationships are ever the same, the grief that follows
from this particular loss is also never the same. How could we possibly express the magnitude of the true loss we feel inside? We each experience loss and pain in our own personal ... Views: 59
Anger is a common emotion experienced by individuals whose relationship has recently ended. Many would like to be able to dispense with such feelings but instead find themselves caught in the endless loop of having to fuel the anger by reminding themselves of the hurts, deceptions, lies, abuse ... Views: 117
Any unsuccessful relationship leaves residual feelings of sadness and grief. Now as so-called "normal" human beings we are expected to bear these feelings. Many therapists will tell you for instance that having such feelings is a normal part of the process, a normal part of living.
In this ... Views: 118
Navigating the Waters of Grief …
Grieving a loss of any kind can seem as if a storm has ripped away our sail from a well-charted life.
The loss of a loved one, a pet, employment, a lifestyle, physical health, or a way of being can seem as if we were unexpectedly thrown overboard into the ... Views: 110
When my friend was diagnosed with cancer and was facing radiation and chemotherapy, I wondered what I could I do when I lived 2,000 miles away. I couldn’t do any of the usual things to help. Normally, I might offer to drive her to chemotherapy and radiation sessions, take care of her kids, or ... Views: 241
Do you know that a broken heart from a previously failed relationship is one of the greatest impediments to a) having another relationship and b) having a successful relationship? Do you know this is because the pain associated with the broken heart never actually goes away it only gets buried ... Views: 215
Dealing with the holidays while you are grieving for a loved one can be stressful and emotionally exhausting. For most of us the holiday season magnifies the absence of the person lost. You may feel that long-held traditions can never be the same or could be awkward. It can be sad shopping for ... Views: 37
(excerpts from the book Holiday Grief: How to Cope with Stress, Anxiety and Depression After a Loved One’s Death)
Since I’ve been involved in helping grieving children for most of my career, it is very important to me to help you learn about the needs of young people when the holidays and ... Views: 37
The funeral was lovely. It was packed with friends paying their respects. But once everyone else has gone back to normal routines, close family and dear friends still grieve for the lost loved one. They may feel that the world has passed them by and feel very alone.
Now is a perfect moment to ... Views: 119
Do you know that one of the major impediments to starting a new relationship is the emotional pain and vulnerability that lingers from the experience of past infidelities?
Do you know this emotional baggage contributes to such things as fears of commitment, fears of intimacy, patterns of ... Views: 133
Survivor guilt is the guilt that is carried by individuals who survive the death of loved ones or other members of a cultural, national, religious or other group that they belong to.
It is felt along with feelings of unworthiness, a sense of being undeserving, an unconscious need to join ... Views: 205
After a significant loss most individuals go through a period of grief that many consider normal and part of the human condition. For many this period is painfully debilitating affecting their energy, health, ability to be present and productive and most importantly their ability to remember and ... Views: 129
We cringe as we hear of the latest mass tragedy whether it's another shooting, a hurricane, tornado, fire, or flood. It's just one more horrific event that fills our daily thoughts and hearts. Yet, we never believe that something so awful could ever happen to us or to anyone close to ... Views: 454
When my grandmother passed away at 98 it was a very difficult time in my life. As part of the process of working through my own grief I wrote the following poem.
Grandma Went Home On Mother’s Day
She was the mother of a son and a daughter.
She was the loving grandmother to five.
She was ... Views: 17
When someone close to us dies many companies will give you a few days off with pay to recover. Much of the rest of our society seems to believe that grief is something very temporary. If only it were that simple or easy. Grief is not about forgetting or “ getting over it. “ It is about learning ... Views: 28
I recently attended my uncle’s memorial service and it was wonderful to watch 4 of his 6 children talk about him. There is no doubt that all were experiencing butterflies as they stood at the lectern but they did an excellent job controlling their nervousness. The expression of their emotions, ... Views: 250
When you meet someone for the first time and get to know them, you're sending them some of your energy. That energy carries information about you. Sending it to them is your way of letting them know who you are. They receive it, absorb it, and send you some of their energy as well. This back and ... Views: 158
If you have experienced miscarriage, you know that feeling that keeps nagging you - what did I do wrong? Why did my baby have to die inside me? Unfortunately, there is no reason and yet we upset ourselves, looking for the one alcoholic drink we had before we knew we were pregnant or if life ... Views: 270
The greatest truth about being happy is that happiness is a choice and a decision. It's just a thought away! Every day you wake up and get to make the decision about how you want to feel.
Ask yourself, "Do I want to be happy today?" Isn't that the choice most of us would want? And yet, we ... Views: 312
Your role has changed… no longer are you the care giver. Your loved one has died and things are now different. You may be feeling a whole host of emotions ranging from relief, to anger, to disbelief and sadness. You may be responding by questioning who you are now, and how you go on. Welcome to ... Views: 200
I recently read some rather depressing medical news – and that is that anti-depressants don’t work. What’s worse is that we have all been conned by the FDA and the pharmaceutical industry telling us how much they DO work. We all know what a common problem depression is in mental health care. ... Views: 313
Death, no matter what the cause, is always unexpected and a shock. I know this, and as a death care professional and grief coach, I teach this. Working over 12 years in the death care industry, I’ve seen the emotions of death and grief. I’ve assisted hundreds of families with prearrangements, ... Views: 322
Capture Your Memories
Sherry Joiner –Living A Life With Schizo-Affective Disorder - Lecturer in the Psyche Ward and In Our Own Voice Speaker for NAMI
When I was having trouble with mom’s suicide in my 40’s I dealt with my insecurities by sewing. I began with stitchery kits of flowers, ... Views: 264
When a relationship comes to an end, it can often lead to pain. For some people the end of a relationship will be experienced solely as a loss and for others, although there is a sense of loss, it will also be coupled with a sense of freedom and that the time had come.
This will of course ... Views: 433
“Grief can destroy you --or focus you. You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you alone. OR you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for ... Views: 332
This is something that can affect someone in many ways and as a result of many things. Some losses can simply be ignored and forgotten about and then there are others can are harder to forget.
One can also lose something and never forget the loss; regardless of how much times goes by or what ... Views: 353
Dear Dr. Romance:
What Is The Grieving Process?
What are the stages of the grieving process? How long does it take to go through each stage? Can one stage be relived over and over again? Is there a way to help someone through each stage?
If you've had a personal ... Views: 342
When someone advises you to "take a deep breath" what do you actually do? How does it feel in your body? Try it right now, paying close attention to the front of your body. Where does the movement of the breath come in?
I'm guessing you probably felt it most in your chest. You also probably ... Views: 391
The Butterfly in all its glory is a symbol of transformation, hope, faith, and love. Its most important role however is the remarkable gift it gives to us, in understanding death and rebirth unveiling the process of re-incarnation.
Another extraordinary example of the butterfly is its ability ... Views: 462
The Power of Love
A number of years ago, while attending the Trauma Recovery Certification training, a teacher who worked with troubled youth remarked that by the end of the year she wanted all the children to know that God loves them. In response, I invited her to ponder if a better ... Views: 534
Irishman Walking is about my walking the coastal roads of Japan through a series of summer, winter, spring, and autumn stages. Stage 2 began in the city of Noshiro, Akita Prefecture in the winter of 2009, and ended in Tsuruoka City, Yamagata four weeks later in January 2010. Last summer (2012), ... Views: 667
Healing our heart is a multifaceted process that takes patience. The first step is to acknowledge that our heart is broken. Whether it is through the death of a loved one, a relationship ending or a betrayal in a close relationship the broken heart will heal.
Once we accept the pain and ... Views: 545
We all have a story to tell that makes us who we are today. We ask people to tell their transformational stories in this magazine; therefore, I am going to share my story here this month. Through this letter to my brother, I will share how our enlightened relationship transformed my ... Views: 601
Did you know Happiness is a choice? You are the one in control of making that decision every single day. It's hard to fathom when it feels like the whole world and the economy are in chaos. However, I learned through tragedy and ultimately triumph, I could choose "happy," no matter ... Views: 659
A school’s complete body of students will be impacted upon when the sudden death of a student’s parent becomes known.
Come morning, usually, the school’s administration has been notified allowing them to brief their staff before the school’s day starts. The school board’s psychologist will ... Views: 546
The holidays are supposed to be a happy time of the year. We have time off, we get to see our families, our kids are excited about this magical time of the year, etc. But for many people the holidays only mean stress, anxiety, and grief. If you have lost a loved one, you may be experiencing this ... Views: 612
There are many facts about Near Death Experiences that have come to light through the research in that field over the last 30 years. The more we look into them, the more we receive wonderful messages about the wider truths.
The near death experiences (NDEs) that occur following an accident ... Views: 744
I know I'm not alone in the fact that I've lost someone very special to breast cancer, and I'm sure I'm not alone in the fact that it still hurts after nearly twenty years. My mom passed away in 1993, a victim of this horrible disease, and getting over her death has taken most of my adult life. ... Views: 1087
Recently a phrase popped into my head, "Inexplicably predictably happy." That's one way I experience God--words come to me and I can tell they are not mine (some people call this "channeling").
I was actually grieving at the time I "heard" those words, but even though I was grieving, I ... Views: 861
Just before Christmas when I was 7 years old my dad died and I experienced a life altering paradigm shift. It was as if the curtains closed at the end of an act on the stage of my life and when they reopened, the scenery had completely changed leaving me feeling unsafe and bewildered. As a ... Views: 591
You experienced a horrible loss. The grief has nearly destroyed you.
Although you are aware grief has no schedule or timetable, you are a year into your extended mourning session and want it to stop. In fact, you have become nearly paralyzed with sadness and know this can’t go on. What can ... Views: 765
Recently I made a trip to the supermarket, and was delighted to be able to help an elderly couple with some of shopping’s little snags such as pulling the trolley out and reaching for higher goods. They reminded me of my parents, and I so wanted to go home with them. As we chatted, the woman ... Views: 731
I was listening to the weather guy last night saying he knows that many of us are upset that summer is gone, but then reminded listeners that fall that is quite spectacular. I have to agree with him. Of course, it depends where you live. In the Northeast, we get to see all those incredible fall ... Views: 656
We all long for a peaceful life. We search for peace through the mediums that our culture sells: through spending, watching television, searching the Internet, finding the “perfect” partner, having a baby, and a variety of other misguided methods. We even meditate, practice yoga, and attend ... Views: 832