By Sam Vaknin
Author of "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"
Anxiety Disorders – and especially Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD) – are often misdiagnosed as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
Anxiety is uncontrollable and excessive apprehension. Anxiety disorders usually ... Views: 74
Recovery From Codependence: A Brief Introduction
Do you think you may have codependent behavior? This phenomenon isn't as uncommon as many believe. If you find yourself controlling others or bending over backwards to help others at the risk of your own health or sanity, a codependency ... Views: 95
I think a lot about helping people Be the Change. I think the biggest surprise to many of them is the invisible workings of their own minds which might be just the one factor they haven’t consciously looked at.
When I was first drawn to this coaching work, I noticed that the way I thought was ... Views: 35
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” ~ Wm. Shakespeare, Hamlet Act 2, Scene 2, 251
You know that I am a Change Coach. One of the most beneficial things I do is to help people who want to improve their lives to systematically make the necessary changes even ... Views: 45
Many people consider the mind to be part of the brain, but as Rene Descartes – the father of modern philosophy said, “there is a vast difference between the mind and the body, in that the body...is always divisible, while the mind is completely indivisible” .
Our thoughts, our ideas, our ... Views: 60
Over the past 20 years, I have seen hundreds of people lose weight and get in shape with the help of hypnosis and other mind power techniques. So it is very frustrating when time and time again, “hypnotism” is portrayed as witchcraft of some kind – in the movies we see over and over again the ... Views: 123
There is a over abundance of books, articles, and blogs written on the subject of gratitude but did you know that being grateful is actually an antidote to anger?
Gratitude is a conscious state of appreciation, the ability to feel good in the midst of difficulties and disappointments, and ... Views: 62
It is now a proven fact: What you think about has a direct impact on every aspect of your life, including your physical well being.
Recent studies show that the expression of gratitude, for example, can have profound and positive effects on our health, our moods and even the survival of our ... Views: 84
Whether you are aware of it or not, the power of your mind is ALWAYS at work … but not always in your awareness.
The subconscious mind is an entirely different "creature" from the conscious mind. This is often a difficult idea to truly grasp, and yet it is precisely the reason that people ... Views: 89
Over the last decade of working in the field of Psychotherapy and Coaching, I've met many clients who had a rather negative experience or no results at all as they worked with some of my colleagues. The situation is not limited to certain countries or branches of Psychology.
As a solution to ... Views: 55
Which statement rings truer for you?
1) Feeling good makes me happy.
2) Being happy makes me feel good.
At first glance, I felt the two were reciprocal, but after thinking it through, I discovered a missing link.
When I’m feeling good, happiness abounds… joy arises in everything I see ... Views: 106
Many years ago, I was in a significant relationship in which the other person started doing things that surprised and hurt me. I'll preserve the privacy here so I won't be concrete, but it was pretty intense. After going through the first wave of reactions - What?! How could you? Are you kidding ... Views: 32
Clinical Hypnotherapy is a powerful form of Psychotherapy combining cognitive therapeutic counselling with subconscious healing techniques. Hypnosis is commonly described as a natural treatment that uses guided relaxation, intense concentration, and focused attention to achieve a heightened ... Views: 118
I have had a lot of trouble with the idea of criminalization of drug addiction for a very long time.
I am only one of a lot of folks who say “addiction is a real disease.” People feel every bit as sick as people with other diseases, sometimes more.
The patients are certainly able to die ... Views: 94
Summary: Not two sides to a coin—there's also an edge, and there's a third, not easily seen option to fighting the New World Order and dying versus selling out to it and the false worship (Rev 13:14-17). God who “declares the end from the beginning” (Isaiah 46:10) has provided a way to escape ... Views: 65
I'M ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN.
WHO WE ARE ON THE INSIDE, GOVERNS WHO WE ARE ON THE OUTSIDE.
Change is hard—especially internal change. Here is some insight on how to grow spiritually.
Have you noticed that it’s just plain hard to make changes in your life? Losing ... Views: 116
When the behaviors of a Type A are out of control, we can take responsibility for situations and outcomes, for the feelings and experience or others, and for absolutely everything around us. We think everything is our responsibility, and thus, within our control to affect. We fear if we don’t ... Views: 90
Negative thinking takes a huge toll on our energy. It prevents us from enjoying every moment that life has to offer (good and bad) and from reaching our goals. We work a job that we really don’t care for instead of making our vocation a vacation (the act of enjoying what you do for a living). I ... Views: 51
When one is unable to let go, they’re going to end up using their energy to hold onto what they no longer need. And as they no longer need what they’re holding onto, it is not going to affect their ability to receive anything new.
What one is holding onto no longer has a purpose and it is ... Views: 86
Following the tragedy of Robin Williams’ death from suicide, I was struck to hear how many people were affected by his death. Clients, who I was seeing for depression, told me how they thought maybe suicide was a good idea and they seemed to be considering it more seriously since the comedian’s ... Views: 59
I recently read an article that described depression as "a psychological reaction to the violent deformities of the modern world." I found that statement deeply provocative and began to ponder it's meaning. "Anger turned inward" doesn't satisfy me anymore. I do not subscribe to the belief that ... Views: 57
Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm a 70-yr old man who has been married more than forty years. I read your article "Autonomy and Dependency" I feel like I've been in a codependency relationship the last fifteen years and havedeveloped anxiety & depression. My wife is a ... Views: 109
My wife and kids tease me that the title of this practice is corny - and it is. Still, I like it. If you don't nourish the things that nourish you, they wither away like a plant in dry stony ground.
I'm writing this on New Year's Eve. Looking to the year ahead for you - a year that can begin ... Views: 37
The concept of a Type A personality has not been around for long. It was actually identified in the 1950s by two cardiologists, Drs. Meyer Friedman and Ray Rosenman, who were studying coronary heart disease. They found a link between personality types and heart disease. According to their ... Views: 63
FAILURES NOT AN OPTION:
NEVER GIVE UP!
So often we miss out on God’s best because we give up too soon.
As you all know, I'm going through a very difficult time in my life right now. Not a day goes by when I don't feel like throwing in the towel and just giving up. But when I sit still ... Views: 102
If I spend time thinking about the various issues specific to addicted clients I come up with a few central themes. Many people need to find a sense of purpose, some need to find a sober place to live, and others need to find a way to earn income or repair family relationships. However, what is ... Views: 116
The narcissist constructs a narrative of his life that is partly confabulated and whose purpose is to buttress, demonstrate, and prove the veracity of the fantastically grandiose and often impossible claims made by the False Self. This narrative allocates roles to significant others in the ... Views: 122
Attics and basements were a staple of most houses on the East Coast, where I was brought up. The attic was often stifling hot, cramped and suffocating. You would ascend a steep, narrow stairway, a storage box held precariously in hand, and deposit it in the nearest empty space, relieved to get ... Views: 79
It could be argued that stress management is a lot like time management. Everyone has the same amount of time in a day, but the individuals who are most productive tend to be those who are very careful about how they spend their time.
In terms of tackling stress, the same principle applies. ... Views: 72
Many of us are taught that self-praise is selfish and immodest. Some have even been taught that it was wrong. Or perhaps it was indirectly inferred that it was wrong. For example, we may as children have heard our mother, father or teacher say "look at her, she's so full of herself" or look at ... Views: 116
Regardless of how many tragedies occur in this country due to mental health issues, for many Americans there is still a stigma attached to those who suffer. Few are willing to openly address the issue. Tragedies such as Adam Lanza's mass murder of over twenty innocent elementary school children ... Views: 62
Surely there can never be personal growth without someone having a Memory. Perhaps one of the key physical ingredient to personal development is having a good memory. We use it in our daily lives but often we take it for granted. Imagine life without memory. You would not even remember your own ... Views: 77
"There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds." Laurell K Hamilton Mistral's Kiss
From the outside looking in, it is easy to say, but he had so much why couldn't he find the help he needed. From the inside looking out, a lot of the ... Views: 79
Start Doing This Immediately to Train Your Brain for Success!
What I’m about to share with you in this article cannot be ignored. It has literally made the difference in my clients’ ability to gain control over their lives in remarkable ways.
You may have heard of visualization or maybe ... Views: 161
We are all in a time of high stress, and
national disasters often bring up fear. If these fears are not
dealt with, they can lead to acting out behavior,
such as drinking too much or creating relationship, work or money
problems as a distraction. To avoid ... Views: 89
Do you got to?
Enjoy the freedom not to.
We're pulled and prodded by financial pressures, commuter traffic, corporate policies, technology, advertising, politics, and the people we work with and live with. As well, internal forces yank the proverbial chains, ... Views: 41
We live in a culture where expressing grief is not honored in meaningful ways. We live in a society that’s awkward around the subject of death & dying, as well as grief. We have “bereavement leaves” in the workplace that last for three or four days. We use words like you need to “get over it,” ... Views: 55
Recovering from any addiction does not happen overnight. It could take years to get back to your old self. The withdrawal symptoms are difficult to deal with, too. With the right mindset and dedication to overcome, you will kick the nasty habit. Find 6 ways to muster enough courage to overcome ... Views: 53
Secure America Now sponsors an ad that recreates the “Daisy Girl.” It suggests Obama’s refusal to stand up to the Islamist Iran is risking disaster for America. Muslim jihadists in America are probable.
Described as “a nonpartisan organization dedicated to bringing critical security issues to ... Views: 57
SOME PEOPLE AS THEY GET OLDER or busier have difficulty remembering names, among other things. Age is not always the reason. Our brains continue to restore and generate new neurons. Actually, you probably know young people who have problems remembering names, words, events. When we are young we ... Views: 192
Summary: Prescription drugs have had a “free pass” for too long. It's time to revisit the science of pharmacology, evolved from toxicology—the science of how much chemical killed half the animals.
A close friend of Williams said Robin was taking a drug for Parkinsons that listed suicide as a ... Views: 80
Depression and anxiety are, by far, the most common mental health problems. Nearly 20 percent of the US population struggles with or will struggle with one or both of these problems.
The most common treatment today for these issues is medication—typically prescribed by the primary care ... Views: 89
The suicide of Robin Williams has shaken—and awakened us up. News of his death has made many of us think:
If someone with family, fame, and fortune could do that, could that happen to someone like me who doesn’t have all those things?
I’ve been feeling really down lately, and ... Views: 79
The trouble with passive-aggression is that both the giver and the receiver often have no idea what’s really going on. In other words, the person who’s passive-aggressive (P-A) may know he hates conflict, may know he’s feeling a little angry and may know he’s covering it up. But he doesn’t ... Views: 81
At best, their behavior is dishonest. At worst, it’s abusive. But you may not have even noticed it. That’s because a passive-aggressive person can be so subtle you may not realize their supposed joke was really a hostile remark. Or their procrastination at getting something you need done is ... Views: 62
Several years ago, I had a client whose nine-year old son had anger issues. His doctor diagnosed him with ADD and suggested medication to quell his angry outbursts. "What do you think?" the mother inquired of me. Not an advocate of prescription medications (with the exception of the most extreme ... Views: 73
By "sobriety," I mean healthy self-control, a centered enjoyment of life, and an inner freedom from drivenness. We typically apply this sense of balance and self-care to things like food, drugs and alcohol, sexuality, money, and risky behaviors. And if you like, you could bring sobriety to other ... Views: 41
Brain training can nurture the genius in all of us as the idea that our Intelligence Quotient (IQ) is an inherited trait is fixed for life is a common but mistaken one. Decades of research have now shown that intelligence levels are relatively malleable. More importantly, research carried out by ... Views: 50
When someone has been abused as a child they have already gone through enough, without having to prolong the pain of what happened. However, there are certain things that can add to this pain and one of these things is when one finds that the people around them don’t believe them or it could ... Views: 94
Lately I have been experiencing a ground swell of desire for a new way to be and live. I expect to see this from my clients, however I am seeing it in places and people I would not expect.
Arianna Huffington shares her thoughts about redefining success in her new book, Thrive: The Third ... Views: 104