It's kind of amazing: right now, what you think and feel, enjoy and suffer, is changing your brain. The brain is the organ that learns, designed by evolution to be changed by our experiences: what scientists call experience-dependent neuroplasticity.
Neurons that fire together, wire together. ... Views: 61
When it comes to living really well, many confuse doing so with looking good, feeling good, or having the goods. This leads people to chase after such goods as fake tans, plastic surgery, feel good drugs, virtual friendships, the mansion on the hill—preferably overlooking the water, making and ... Views: 103
When it comes to living really well, many confuse doing so with looking good, feeling good, or having the goods. This leads people to chase after such goods as fake tans, plastic surgery, feel good drugs, virtual friendships, the mansion on the hill—preferably overlooking the water, making and ... Views: 89
More than 90 percent of persons in recovery will relapse at least once in their lifetime and at least 72 percent will have multiple relapses. Substance abuse counselors report that the relapse did not begin with the return to substance use, but with circumstances that led up to returning to ... Views: 121
We all berate ourselves from time to time. Some of us more than others. And constant negative self-talk cannot be helpful for our self-esteem and self-confidence. You can try noticing next time you hear a critical voice inside your head. Be aware of what it is saying to you, and let us diffuse ... Views: 146
Life, to many, seems like it is a series of popularity contests. The only people who don’t like popularity contests are those that either believe they will lose them, or worse, do lose them. They hold their breath each time they walk into a room, get up to speak, raise their hand in class or go ... Views: 163
Most people think an alcoholic is someone who cannot keep a job, has financial and legal problems, is dysfunctional in relationships and may even be homeless. Stereotypes really do affect how we perceive people. However, for the high-functioning alcohol none of those ideas ... Views: 113
In the late sixties, I married my high school sweetheart. He was a quiet person by nature so when we began having difficulties in our marriage and his response was one of silence I thought it was just his personality. Little did I realize it was a manipulative technique that would eventually ... Views: 113
If you have been abused as a child in any way and this affects your confidence, first of all recognize that the love has to come from you. This is hard, if you have been trained by parents/guardians/people in authority that you were not lovable. Of course, this is to justify their abusive ... Views: 186
We all have different kinds of mind-sets, personalities, attitudes, beliefs, values, predispositions, perceptual tendencies, and habits overall. We live by our behavioural, cognitive and emotional trails in one way or the other. These traits are our identity, pride, recognition, esteem, and ... Views: 132
I usually describe a practice as something to do: get on your own side, see the being behind the eyes, take in the good, etc. This practice is different: it's something to recognize. From this recognition, appropriate action will follow. Let me explain.
Some years ago I was invited to give a ... Views: 64
By Sam Vaknin
Author of "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"
Positive feelings (about oneself or pertaining to one's accomplishments, assets, etc.) – are never gained merely through conscious endeavor. They are the outcome of insight. A cognitive component (factual knowledge regarding ... Views: 147
"We are our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.” – Tom Robbins, Still Life with Woodpecker
I’ve walked away from many relationships, both platonic and romantic, over the past two years. Those people may never understand my decisions, but I ... Views: 196
I love being a ”shrink-lady.” (okay, a “psychiatrist.”)
I did not pick it out of a hat. I tried a couple of other medical specialties. The “doctor” part — well, there was never any doubt about that part, really. I mean the idea of taking care of other folks came into my head pretty early ... Views: 74
SMART* Recovery and 12-Step Programs
In the world of addiction treatment there are several choices one has in the way of utilizing and attending a community based support group. Should one look more closely at what is offered to those with an eating disorder the choices are somewhat more ... Views: 218
Problems with Current Therapies
Depression is very common, with a lifetime rate of over 20% in the USA. It is estimated to be the leading cause of disability in developed countries worldwide by the World Health Organization. In depressed patients who do see improvement with treatment, relapse ... Views: 178
We have been seeing many M1 type Solar Flares lately, so I thought this would be a great opportunity to talk about the impact and affects of the solar flares on our energy.
Solar Flares bombard the earth with an increased amount of high frequency energy. These flares have caused lots of ... Views: 125
Righteous indignation. Proving your point. Being right. Holding On. Never letting go. Beating a dead horse. Having to win. Always coming out on top. Having to have the last word. Sound familiar? Then this column is surely for you.
I believe that peace is the single greatest good. Peace. You ... Views: 120
(part 3 of A Soft Place to Call Home)
Now that you have made space for your thoughts and listened to them, gently, without judgment, and without reacting, what would the next steps be? How do you develop the perspective to ... Views: 161
(part 2 of A Soft Place to Call Home
“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky
Conscious breathing is my anchor”
Thich Nhat Hanh
In my last article, I wrote about the importance of being compassionate ... Views: 128
When I was fourteen, my godparents gave birth to a baby boy after twenty years of marriage. The most joyful day of their lives was shattered by the devastating news that their son had Down's Syndrome. Fifty years ago Downs was a death sentence and Robert was no exception. Three weeks later they ... Views: 118
EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) became increasingly popular recently because it is, indeed, effective and at the same time very easy to use. However, there are also a lot of reports that it is not as effective as it was reported to be.
EFT founder, Gary Craig, blamed it on the fact that the ... Views: 78
Do you look towards others for validation? Do you find your self-worth depends on how worthwhile people think you are? Do you wish you had the confidence that others seem to have? If so, read on.
Let us take the last question. If you wish to have the self-confidence that others seem to have, ... Views: 129
The average college student leads a very busy life. There are deadlines, homework assignments, and during finals week, a lot of flash cards and study notes to memorize. What if there was a healthy way for college students to unwind and let go of some of the stress that comes along with post high ... Views: 81
Courageous Creative Empowerment
Having a sense of creative empowerment is about the power to create! It begins by centering yourself so you may achieve clarity and know that you have the courage you need to live in the now! When you have the courage to create, you never truly know what ... Views: 107
We all have issues - including demands upon us, stresses, illnesses, losses, vulnerabilities, and pain. (As Alan Watts put it: "Life is wiggly.") Of course, many of our issues - in the broad sense I'm using the word here - are related to important sources of fulfillment, such as starting a ... Views: 82
Positivity is a universal trait and a common factor to enhance our well being over all over the world. Every day we learn about positivity and try to adopt it as much as possible in our day to day life. We love to be called as positive parents, couples, children and positive members of our ... Views: 137
I have seen them.
Men, who sit in my office and tell me they are addicts to internet pornography.
They describe symptoms that have long been regarded as markers of addiction.
Dependence — They start feeling poorly, maybe even depressed, if they don’t get their regular quota of ... Views: 144
Experiences can be painful. Such is life. When we were little, we ran to mommy and her kiss and cuddle fixed everything. Lying in her arms, there seemed not a worry in the world and the incident that had brought us running and howling was very soon a lonely cloud drifting in the far distance. ... Views: 155
The single biggest problem in communication
is the illusion that it has taken place.
-George Bernard Shaw, playwright
Communication is the glue that holds relationships together. So, the question is – Do you believe that you communicate often enough and in the right way to create and ... Views: 153
The single biggest problem in communication
is the illusion that it has taken place.
-George Bernard Shaw, playwright
Communication is the glue that holds relationships together. So, the question is – Do you believe that you communicate often enough and in the right way to create and ... Views: 142
They're like mosquitoes on a hot summer night - those irritating and annoying people. They can be found anywhere from our families or coworkers to drivers on the roadways to complete strangers we encounter while on vacation. Their quirky behaviors and annoying habits can ruin our day. Other ... Views: 120
It is often said that abuse is passed down from one generation to another and it can be hard for people to understand why this happens. However, the next generation are not the only ones who can end up being abused; it is also something that can affect the people who the abuser comes into ... Views: 150
When I look back on mistakes I've made - like dumping my anger on someone, making assumptions in haste, partying too much, losing my nerve, being afraid to speak from my heart - in all cases a part of me had taken over. You know what I mean. The parts of us that have a partial view, are driven ... Views: 68
The achievement made in the field of medicine and science in the last century would be dwarfed by the achievements occurred in this century. The advancement in technology would make practicing medicine faster, cheaper and better. And the best part is that patients would be benefited a lot from ... Views: 160
Recently a client admitted to falling back into an old undesirable habit. Ashley had once again become a tyrant at home. She was obsessed with the cleanliness of her house. She worried about getting things done on time. She stopped interacting with her family. The only time she spoke to them was ... Views: 159
One of the most direct ways to transform your life is to let go of the past. Many people try to let go of painful memories or forget the past. Another option is to let go of emotional wounds from the past.
Emotions are different from thoughts. Emotions are experienced in the body. According ... Views: 112
Is your past still affecting you? Are painful emotions from childhood holding you back?
How do you know if your past is still affecting you?
Some people are very aware of how their past affects their present. For example, being a child of divorce can create insecurity and worry in present ... Views: 109
People are looking for ways to improve their lives and create more success. Many methods focus on changing thoughts and behaviors. Releasing emotional wounds from the past is another option. Could this option be right for you?
What causes emotional wounds?
Painful or traumatic events from ... Views: 96
We being a human always search for easy fixes, short cuts, and quick ways to fulfill our desires, wishes, and needs. We want to be happy as early as possible. We are quite impatient and inconsistent in achieving our goals and become successful. It is our nature and we fight with our nature to ... Views: 120
In classical EFT, tappers often use the Setup statement of "Even though I have this [problem], I deeply love myself". Some tappers cannot say "I deeply love myself" or even "I love myself". This is a sign that self-love can do with a boost.
And you may wonder why anyone should worry about ... Views: 159
When you've survived a traumatic experience, the anxiety that often follows can consume you for the rest of your life. Whether the traumatic event was a violent attack or a life-threatening car accident, this anxiety can occasionally develop into post-traumatic stress. Things that didn't matter ... Views: 118
At one time or another, we've all complained that life isn't fair. Children do it all the time: Karen, who is older by two years, is allowed to stay up later than her younger siblings. They complain to dad that they're being treated unjustly, not realizing that at the same age her bedtime was ... Views: 123
I just read that studies indicate that people who suffer from depression are actually more realistic, than people who are optimistic. Researchers seemed to conclude that those of use who are optimistic are in fact delusional. We tend to think we are better looking, have a better ... Views: 363
As I write this, I'm 690 miles from my office in Los Angeles. Actually, I'm in Park City, Utah enjoying a glass of Pinot and writing to you. I'm here on a family vacation getting some much needed rest and a modified digital detox.
One of the benefits I've experienced since leaving the office ... Views: 131
Approximately 8 out of 10 people in this planet have some sort of faith, religion, or belief in some kind of divine force, and/or supreme being(s). There are numerous religions, spiritual authorities, scriptures and interpretations of the divine and all of them seem to possess the power to ... Views: 142
Incredible as it sounds, I still am amazed at how often I hear people say “I don’t believe in ADHD.” You probably have heard it too. And if you are like me, the moment those words come out of their mouth, every hair raises on the back of your neck, the fire starts to churn in the pit of your ... Views: 221
Ahhh…the comfort zone. That comfy familiar place where we feel safe. Here we can kick back, relax and pat ourselves on the back. Livin’ seems easy…but there is an underlying restlessness as if something is missing. Is this the comfort zone or…are we “zoning out”?
Recently, I was asked to ... Views: 304
Recently I’ve noticed that being “happy” or striving for “happiness” is a major topic of many conversations. We seem to live in a world where we are inundated by information about being happy. Pursuing it could literally be a full time job! Being someone who has struggled with depression, it has ... Views: 202
Which is more important to help manage your symptoms of ADD…exercise, diet or sleep?
Ideally we are fueling our bodies with nutritious food, moving our bodies with regular exercise and getting the consistent sleep we need to feel rested, alert and focused to decrease our symptoms of ... Views: 161