Without a doubt, the easiest person to forget is yourself. And just because you manage to feed yourself and put on clean clothes each day, doesn’t mean you’re giving yourself the time and attention you need and deserve.

This is especially true if you think of yourself as a strong woman, as a survivor. The tougher you think you are, the more you’re likely to push and push and push without giving yourself a second thought.

But even survivors need to take time out. Just like a gas tank, if you keep giving and giving, you’ll run out of fuel. The problem is that it’s not up to others to stop by your tank and refill it with energy. That’s your job. And if you’re waiting on others you may be waiting for a long time while feelings of resentment and anger continue to build because no one remembers to think you of you for a change.

It’s time you think of yourself first. Here are clues to help you figure out if you’ve forgotten yourself. If you answer yes to 2 or more of the criteria below, you’re either on your way to forgetting yourself or you have already completely forgotten you exist. Use these clues as your first step in getting back into touch with who you are.

1. You can’t answer the question “Who are You?” Go ahead, see if you can. It shouldn’t take more than 8 seconds for you to come up with an answer. What types of things come to mind about yourself? Do you mention what you do at work? Do you mention your role as a family member? What about any labels you have about yourself? If you did... OOOPPSS! None of those have anything to do with who you are. Who you are is comprised of your strengths, your values, and your psychological needs. Do you know yours? Do you know how to figure them out? Take time for yourself to get to know yourself.

2. You’re not quite sure what your current interests are. If anyone asked you what types of things you were interested in, chances are you wouldn’t really know how to answer it. Either you would mention things that really don’t light up anything inside or the same interests you’ve had from 15 to 20 years ago. Are you sure you’re still the same person? Perhaps your tastes and interests have evolved, yet, you still hang on to the old ones since you don’t take time to think about new possibilities.

3. You have almost no hobbies and aren’t part of extracurricular activities. I’m willing to bet you push your kids to be a part of after school activities. Why? Because it would be good for them to develop their skills, hang out with new kids and make some new friends. So... Couldn’t you give yourself the same advice? Hobbies and extracurricular activities are necessary to grow and if you don’t have anything going on, you’ve certainly forgotten about what stimulates you.

4. You’re starting to feel angry and bitter after doing something for others. It’s impossible to keep giving without starting to feel used a little, especially if you’re helping others when your own plate is overflowing with responsibilities. Spending too much time on others also suggests you’re a people pleaser. And with so many people in your life who need to be pleased, how do you ever have time for yourself?

5. You’re always tired. The first thing you may do after feeling tired for a while is go to your doctor to check if your blood work is OK. And that’s great because you rule out possibilities. But when your tests come back A-OK, it’s a sign that you’re probably not giving yourself enough recuperation time. You’re running around on auto-pilot without tuning in to what your body is telling you. Part of treating yourself well is giving yourself enough rest time AND play time. It’s the only way to stay motivated and happy in life.

Author's Bio: 

Toronto Life Coach for Women, Ivana Pejakovic, B.Sc., MA, provides training and support to kind-hearted and genuine women who struggle with their self-esteem, feel stuck and trapped, or are emotionally exhausted. I offer educational programs, products with the goal of helping my clients Reach Their Full Potential.

For more information visit: www.lifecoachintoronto.com