Many Moons ago. Talking to people was something I avoidedwhere possible.
At the time, I did not know I was unconsciously settingmyself up for failure. I kept making the same mistakeswithout even noticing what I was doing wrong.
You may be doing the same thing.
Here are three common mistakes together with tips on how todeal with them:
1. Judging Your performance Against Unrealistic Standards
Be honest with yourself.
Accept that where you are now in terms of yourcommunication skills is only your starting point - not yourfinishing point.
And assess your performance and your progress against yourtypical level of effectiveness. Not against some desiredstate of perfection or ultimate goal.
Goals are very important as a destination to aim for but donot use long term goals as a standard to judge your currentperformance against - that is a recipe for disillusionmentand massive frustration.
I know. Because I tried it!
2. The Failure To Learn Each Day
As people we can be lazy. This means that a lack of followthrough on our goals can go unnoticed. After all we canalways catch up some other day.
This attitude will kill your dreams faster than you canspell failure.
When I started to make massive improvements in how Irelated to people I dedicated myself to becoming excellent.
Once I had proven strategies the rest was easy. I justapplied the material each day. I improved each day becauseI made it a priority and because I committed to applyingthe material.
Now...
I also know people who learned the same peak performancestrategies I learned. Today they are no farther ahead thanthey were years ago.
How did they pull that off?
By putting it off until another day and by neglecting touse what they had learned. Implementation is crucial.
Use what I send you in this newsletter. Revisit my book andmake a point of using at least one lesson each day. NoticeI said USE the material not Read it!
If you do this your progress is a certainty.
3. Attempting To Be Original
Many years ago I put myself under huge pressure byexpecting myself to be original with each person I met.
This is a sure-fire strategy for failure and a great way toget stressed out for no reason.
Guess what I later discovered?
There is no need to be original. You can have the sameconversation all day long with different people and nobodywill suspect a thing!
People are happy to talk about mundane topics because thereis no effort involved.
I have lived or worked in several countries includingIreland, England, Germany, Holland, Spain and the U.S.
And everywhere I have been people are happy to talk all dayabout:
- the weather
- their children
- the new movie
- the family pet
- the boss
- the traffic
You get the idea!
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recentlyproduced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps toDeveloping Communication Confidence. Apply now becauseit is available for a limited time only at:http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm
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