6 years in College Placement has taught me that parents and students are overwhelmed with and acting on emotions, whereas counselors and admissions officers deal with cold hard facts - objective data like middle 50% SAT scores, GPA, acceptance rates, financial aid, and other sorts of exciting figures that mean little to most parents and students.

Enter the college counselor. Our job is to acknowledge reality and to advise, assist, and counsel during the admissions process. And the reality is that these cold hard facts are a strong indicator of a student’s chance of admission. They are, however, questionable when it comes to predicting graduation.

In private schools, where parents spend a considerable amount of money ensuring that their child has the tickets for college admissions, it amazes me how few seem to concern themselves with the end result of their investment - that is to say, that their child graduates, starts a career, invests their savings wisely, and thirty years down the road cares for mom and dad. From a financial point of view, this represents the best case scenario. The reality is that research shows that more than 1/3 of freshman drop out of college and 1/3 of the balance drops out as sophomore. To put it another way, if 1000 students enter college, only 450 make it to their junior year. That's a 65% attrition rate!

In 2000, the Census Bureau reported that the mean income for a student with a high school diploma was $30,400. However, the mean income for a college graduate was $52, 200! That means that, on average, college graduates earn 42% more. Over a 40 year career, accounting for a modest cost of living increase, a college grad stands to earn an additional $900,000!

The real cost, however, cannot be measured quantitatively. What about job satisfaction, opportunity for advancement, happiness, benefits, security, retirement, and a hundred other factors? Certainly, college costs are rising dramatically (some of the most austere privates have price tags over 45 grand, which means $180,000 if your child graduates on time), but the return on that financial investment is 500%!

The smart parent looks at private school as investment in their child's future, but in this case, I'm using the term "investment" more metaphorically. But it absolutely is an investment, one parents cannot afford to see as anything different.

So how does one get through college, get a good job that pays well and is rewarding? Is it the right high school? The right major? A high GPA or standardized test score? Luck?

Hardly. There are four factors that separate those who would drop out and those who would succeed. To that end, I present the following:

Four Ways to Ensure Your Child Drops Out of College.

1. Assume that a college preparatory school is preparation enough.

Most college prep schools know that term "college preparatory" is a misnomer. High school does NOT prepare students for college. The more correct term is "college placement." That is to say, college preparatory (placement) schools make sure their students have all the right classes and all the right accolades and all the right activities and all the right test preparation to wrap their students into shiny little bows and present them to college admissions officers, who are in many cases more concerned with their bottom line than with accepting students who actually have a chance of getting all the way through. The vast majority of colleges bank on Spring semester transfers. They know that they will lose a fair percentage of students after the Fall.

2. Use the same definition of "adult" that your parents (and theirs) did.

Have you ever said something like: "My kid is 18 now, so it's their life to do with what they please?"

No it's not. Not if you're footing the bill for their education, their dorm room, and their spending money. They may not be living under your roof, but they are absolutely in need of supervision.

My grandpa worked in coal mines when he was a teenager, took care of three brothers and sisters during the Depression, and joined the Army and served in the infantry in Europe for over three years. He was an adult. My father was raised by that man, worked odd jobs on the weekend and every night after school, and paid his way through college. He was a man, too. Me, I went to private school, wanted for nothing, and got private piano and golf lessons. When I went to college, I was a boy. My parents were down every two to three weeks to make sure I was still enrolled, still attending classes, and had not absconded to Vegas with my book money. Every one of my contemporaries who graduated had a similar family dynamic, or were intrinsically motivated to succeed, perhaps because they came from a broken home, and knew that a degree was the surest way out.

3. Concern yourself more with price than fit.

By fit, I mean whether or not the school is right for your child. This seems like an incredible task, but it's really quite easy. A kid knows real quick, in just a few moments, whether a college is a good fit. The moment they set foot on campus, a student is overwhelmed by the electricity of the campus. It either inspires them, or repels them. Students are more likely to flourish at a school where they feel comfortable and at home.

Conversely, ruling out a school based on price demonstrates a total lack of understanding about financial aid. An Admissions Director at a private school in Maryland once told me that the price for one year was about $38,000, but after financial aid, grants, and scholarships, the average student there was paying about $15,000 a year, or 60% less. Remember, there is a HUGE difference between price and cost. Fit is far more important, as that is more finite.

4. Send them off to college with little to no life skills; after all, that's what college is for.

First, college usually does not teach life skills. If it does, it is indirect at best. I went to a massive school with a massive undergraduate population. I learned real quick to be self-disciplined and self-reliant. It was sink or swim, and for a while, I doggie paddled until I got the hang of it.

Today, there are programs that exist to actually teach your child invaluable life skills that will virtually ensure they succeed not only in college, but in life. I'm talking about skills to cope with stress, skills to plan and execute budgets, skills that encourage a child to resist the influences of drugs and alcohol, skills that promote accountability, self-discipline, and self-esteem.

A not-for-profit organization called Missing Link Coaching (www.missinglinkcoaching.com), has developed programs to prepare college entrants for success in the classroom and life after graduation.

Their ‘My Major Program’ guides students to choose the most suitable major, reduce ‘risk’ behavior so prevalent amongst students such as experimenting with alcohol and drugs, and increases interest in studies and performance in exams. Their method is simple but highly effective - They coach students to identify their natural talents and explore their life and career goals. When a student forms a clear idea of the career path that will bring them success and fulfillment, their studies become relevant and meaningful. Students have talked about finding their “mission in life” and begin to apply themselves to their studies, while avoiding the pressure to party in order to achieve their dream job.

The ‘Freshman Program’ develops essential life skills that will be vital for college success AND life in the real world. The program focuses on developing character attributes such as confidence, determination, goal setting, courage, relationship skills and stress management. These are attributes so often overlooked by standard curricula, but so vital for success.

Parents, if you truly want to help your child succeed, you must abandon some preconceived notions. College prep schools do not actually prepare children for college. This is a different world today, where age and maturity rarely go hand in hand, and fit is far more important than price when determining the right college. It is a challenging and complex world, but we are fortunate to have programs like Missing Link Coaching (www.missinglinkcoaching.com) to help steer us in the right direction. I encourage you to investigate what they have to offer. The cost of a failed college education cannot be measured by numbers alone.

Author's Bio: 

After earning a BA in English and an MS in Education from Florida State University, Randy Withers has spent the last decade in secondary education, half of which as a Director of College Placement. He has taught in both private and public schools, at the secondary level and in college. He currently serves as an associate college counselor and Special Projects Coordinator at Admiral Farragut Academy in St. Petersburg, FL.