It still amazes me. No matter how many times I hear it, when someone tells me that nobody ever listened to them before, or that being listened to was the most powerful experience that they had, I feel a surge of emotion. It’s a mixture of sadness and anger tinged with elation and determination. The sadness is that so many of us don’t feel listened to. The anger is that we appear to have created a society where this is getting worse, not better. The elation is that here, at least with the person I am working with, is the evidence that something can change. The determination I feel is that I will do everything in my power to make it change.

Most conversations are not about listening; they are about each person trying the best they can to get their voice heard, each one telling the best story or coming up with the best idea. The irony is that when that happens, nobody ever gets to hear or to help develop the best idea; we are too busy with our own, or with regretting that nobody heard ours.

Next time you are in conversation, notice the times in between. Notice the silences, sometimes tiny gaps, when someone is perhaps taking something in, having some insight. Notice how the person you are talking to listens to you. Notice how you listen to them.

The sound of listening is not only the most beautiful sound, it is also the most powerful form of understanding and communication yet developed. And it costs so little!

In Peace and Love

Warren Redman
www.EFitInstitute.com
10866-310-3348(EFit)

Author's Bio: 

Warren Redman trained in the UK as a psychotherapist, facilitator and coach and has developed his own unique style of Emotional Fitness Coaching. He is president of the Emotional Fitness Institute (formally the Centre for Inner Balancing), writing about, teaching and coaching people in Emotional Fitness. He is the author of fifteen books, including the Award-winning The 9 steps to Emotional Fitness, Achieving Personal Success and Recipes for Inner Peace.

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