All relationships are a reflection of the sacred relationship, the relationship we have with our Self. What makes the sacred relationship work makes all relationships work. What tarnishes or detracts from the sacred relationship, detracts from every relationship. If you lie to your Self you will not find peace of mind. If you lie in any of your relationships there will not be happiness and harmony.

The most important relationship you'll have in this life is the relationship with your Self. Contrary to what most of us were taught, it is not selfish to be Self-centered. We were taught that it was wrong, egotistical, and unloving to think of yourself first . But those teaching us were making no distinction between self and Self. To truly appreciate the difference we need to share our definitions of self and Self.

When we use the term self we are referring to the human personality or ego self. This part of us is fear-based and looks at life through the lense of doubt, judgment, and belief in a negative reality. When we use the term Self we are referring to our Spirit nature, the Divine aspect, or the Higher Self. This part of us is based in love and sees life through the lense of cooperation, harmony, and forgiveness.

We believe everyone is more than a skin encapsulated ego. You are more than your body, more than your ego or personality self. We are all manifestations of Spirit, come to earth in human form to choose experiences for the growth of the soul.

We can enhance our earthly experience by awakening to our true nature and what we will refer to as Self-Realization. Self-Realization is understanding who we really are and our relationship to Source, God, Goddess, All That Is. Self-Realization is the recognition that the mind has two masters---the human ego or personality self and the Spirit Self.

Spirit, that part of Self that is connected to Source, knows that the ego exists. Ego, that personality driven part of the human mind, is totally unaware of the existance of Spirit and must be taught. We believe that by becoming conscious of our thoughts, we can deliberately choose which master we put in charge.

Humans have free will, and so we get to decide which voice will be in charge of our mind. When we are Self-centered we have made the choice to live life from the center of our Self, recognizing our connection to Source. When we have a good relationship with Self we act from a centered point of well-being and we have good relationships with others.

What does it mean to have a good relationship with your Self? The New Perspective acknowledges that consciousness is primary. Consciousness comes first, and all life and life experiences spring from consciousness. We are Spirit having a human experience. It means, as a spark of the Divine, life comes through you, it doesn't happen to you.

To have a good relationship with your Self you honor your Divinity. It means you stop indulging in negative thinking; thoughts like I'm not enough, I don't have what it takes, and I don't belong. It means you learn to stop denying your brilliance. You stop hiding your Light.

One of the most important messages in our book Art of Relationship: The New Perspective is the idea that life works as a mirror--- the events of your life reflect your inner thoughts and feelings. The mirror of life takes what's "in here" and puts it "out there" for us to see. As you develop a good relationship with yourself and as you learn to love every aspect of yourself you will see an ever increasing reflection of loveliness.

The relationship with Self is the Sacred Relationship. It accompanies you through this life from the moment of birth to the moment of death. In fact, we believe the Self existed before birth and lives on after the death of the body, eternally. This relationship provides your inner sense of well-being. This inner sense can be enhanced or deminished by your behavior. Loving acts foster it, fear based actions diminish it.

When we use this inner sense of well-being as our guide, we make choices that serve our greater good. More important than striving for happiness is learning to cultivate an inner sense of well-being because that feeling stays regardless of what's going on externally. Even in the face of death and grief and deep sorrow there's room for an inner sense of well-being.

(The Sacred Relationship is from the book "Art of Relationship: The New Perspective." Other books by Ron and Denny Reynolds, published by Trafford Publishing include "The New Perspective: Ten Tools for Self-Transformmation," and "We Are Here: The Voice of The New Perspective" )

Author's Bio: 

Ron and Denny Reynolds apply to relationships the Spiritual principles outlined in their first book The New Perspective: Ten Tools for Self-Transformation. They've discovered that conscious awareness brings an enhanced sense of love and harmony to every partnership. In addition to using these principles in their own relationship, Ron and Denny have assisted the growth of other couples in countless workshops and retreats. Denny has been a Marriage and Family Therapist for more than twenty years, practicing in Lafayette, California. Ron is a retired radio and television broadcaster and now devotes time to Spiritual teaching and writing. They have two grown sons and a happy life embracing more than forty-seven years together.