My diagnosis is Major Depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder. Having such a diagnosis is overwhelming to say the least. We hear the words of the diagnosis not quite understanding what it really means and how it will impact our lives. I slowly but assuredly felt thoroughly discouraged and beaten. At that point the diagnosis and ramifications on my life weighed on me like a ton of bricks. I fought! With one arm moving again to a psychiatrist to try one more time for the ¡°right¡± anti-depressant. With one leg moving awkwardly I reach out to therapy to get answers. Answers that did not come. For myself it brought on additional pain. This was increasing my feelings of pain, anger and frustration. I felt more alone than I ever had.

There is a way out. To remove the ¡°bricks¡± of your life. That way is accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior! Jesus died for our mental and physical pain. The emotions of our lives that can bind us. My illness does not define who I am. We are defined as the children of the most high God. Our place being to the right of Jesus who sits at the right hand of God!

God gave us ¡°free will¡± to make choices for ourselves. But God also left a place empty in our hearts that have been set-aside just for him. We know that there is emptiness in our lives. Unfortunately, we attempt to fill that space with food/drugs/shopping; looking for fulfillment.

My childhood years were not influenced by the wisest parents. But my Father (God) provided me with friends who invited me to church with them. School as a respite - I loved to learn, and still do. God knew who our parents would be and what effects (both positive and negative) that they would have on our lives. God has a plan for all of our lives to ultimately be triumphant.

My experience with Mental Illness kept me in disarray. I focused on what was wrong with me (or so I considered to be wrong) and why my life was how it is. I was extremely angry with those family members that I had found ¡°fault¡± with. Anger is ok. We must remember to place it correctly at those who have wronged us and leave it there! The longer we hold onto our charged emotions instead of placing them where they belong, we run the risk of hurting ourselves in the end. These being manifested in further emotional difficulties and even physical problems.

My life became a vicious cycle of major depression and self-abuse. I was in the hospital for psychiatric treatment more times than I care to remember. I was fed up with my life (as it was) and decided to end my life.

I took an overdose of a prescription medication. Lying down I called on God to take me home. That was not his will. He saved me from death that night. Not just physical death but from spiritual death. This marked the beginning of my transition from feeling hopeless to hopeful. My life did not get ¡°easy¡± after that night. I continued to have my battles, I came to the point of feelings of being defeated (again), only this time I considered residential living. A group home. Thank God for walking me through this time in my life. I was blessed and sustained by my Father. I was reminded (through the spirit) of a desire I had as a child. I wanted to be a homeowner. I knew this is what I needed to be ok.

God is always faithful in his word. His promises are written to us all in the HOLY BIBLE. I walked with my Father in faith. I had to act on my belief that a house is what God wanted for me. I was brought nine months later into the house that God wanted me to live in. I do not say ¡°have¡± being all things on earth (and heaven) belong to God.

My faith soared! I began watching christian television and following the sermons with the scripture that was presented. My next turning point came with a study series on ¡°My Identification with Christ¡±. I was thrust into a fellowship with God, the likes of which are only obtainable through Jesus Christ. Learning who Christ is and why he died for me. What he took with him upon his death on the cross. All hindrances of mankind, be it spiritual, physical or emotional!

I learned that I do not have to pick up the same cross that Christ died on and feel defeated in life. I am victorious in this life through the shed blood of Jesus Christ. As a ¡°believer¡± in Jesus Christ I know that the way to my Father is through his son - Jesus Christ.

As believers in Christ, we can take our rightful place at the right hand of Jesus!

Yes, Mental Illness can be debilitating. But must it define who you are. NO! God gave man the knowledge to make the psychiatric medication we take. God gave the psychiatrist the insight on the mind he created for us all. But God is the only one who can and want to make us victorious in all areas of our lives.

Below is the 27th Psalm. A Psalm of David that brought me to my initial realization that I am not alone!

The Lord is my light and my salvation: whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire his temple. For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock. And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy; I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the Lord. Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice: have mercy also upon me, and answer me. When thou saidst, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, Lord, will I seek. Hide not my face far fro me; put not they servant away in anger: thou hast been my help; leave me not, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up. Teach me thy way, O Lord, and lead me in plain path, because of mine enemies. Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty. I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say on the Lord.

Author's Bio: 

carol webb blessed240@juno.com
This article is for all categories(i chose top three) I have a diag. of maj dep/stress I do not want people to stay defeated because we are indeed victorious in christ