What’s Love Got To Do With It?

By Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
"the marriage doctors"

Authors of the INDIE Book Awards Gold Medal Winner for Best Relationship Book of 2008
Golden Anniversaries: The Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage

Available at GoldenAnniversaries.com, Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, and at Bookstores

What’s love got to do with it? Is love really a second hand emotion? A famous song focused on these notions. So what’s the truth about love? Is it real or is it a second hand emotion?

The truth is, love is something very hard to define. Love is often times indescribable. And most certainly, love is NOT a second hand emotion. There is no question about it – love is real! Love is something you feel. Love is something you know to be true even if you can’t define it or describe it.

Over the years we have talked to thousands of people in love, about love. We have discovered the truths about “How you know you are in love,” “The secrets of successful love,” and “How to sustain love.” And through it all, we know these truths to be self-evident – love is real, love is definable, and love is sustainable, often throughout a lifetime.

One of the icons of the entertainment business, Tina Turner, wrote a very popular song entitled, What's Love Got to Do with It? The lyrics of this St. Louis Walk of Fame inductee go like this:

You must understand
That the touch of your hand
Makes my pulse react
That it’s only that thrill
Of boy meeting girl

Opposites attract
It’s physical
Only logical
You must try to ignore
That it means more than that

Oh, what's love got to do with it
What's love but a second hand emotion
What's love got to do with it
Who needs a heart
When a heart can be broken

It may seem to you
That I'm acting confused
When you're close to me
If I tend to look dazed
I've read it someplace

I've got cause to be
There’s a name for it
There’s a phrase for it
But whatever the reason
You do it for me

I've been thinking of a new direction
But I have to say

I've been thinking about my own protection
It scares me to feel that way

What's love got to do with it

What's love but a sweet old fashioned notion

What's love got to do with it

Who needs a heart
When a heart can be broken

Tina had it right in many ways. Love can be scary. Love can be cruel. Love can, for sure, be something that confuses you. It can be, in the end, something that breaks your heart. All this is true, but here’s where we part ways with Tina’s lyrics – even though love stands a chance of turning out badly and breaking your heart, to fall in love and to be in love is a risk in life that is well worth taking, irrespective of the chances of failure.

Frankly, it is natural to be afraid of falling in love. But to fall in love is something that is uniquely human. It is an emotion that often confuses people who think they are in love, but in the end, being in love is a wonderful emotion – an emotion that is exhilarating to feel. And only humans can feel it!

Only a human heart can be broken. To truly be in love, however, is to take the chance that your heart might, in the end, be broken. But can you imagine what you lose by not taking the chance to fall in love?

Love is something you feel. Love is something you feel in your heart. And love is totally worth the risk. Love is NOT a second hand emotion; it is the most exhilarating emotion that all human beings will feel in their lifetime. Go for it!

Falling in love is so very human. When you feel it in your heart and in your soul, take the chance – take the risk. Sure, your heart can be broken, but can you imagine going through life without loving another human being in the deepest and most intimate way?

Being in love is worth the risk. Love is NOT a second hand emotion!

Love well.

Author's Bio: 

Now you can order the Doctors' award winning book, Golden Anniversaries: The Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage at Amazon.com or BarnesandNoble.com or from their website with FREE DVDs. With 25 years of research experience on successful marriage and their own 41-year marriage, Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz know what makes marriage work. From their hundreds of interviews with happily married couples, representing 15,000 years of marriage, they've discovered the seven pervasive characteristics present in all successful marriages. Their book exposes the secrets for success through these poignant, real life stories.

Get started with “the marriage doctors” by taking their Marriage Quiz or asking them a question at Ask The Marriage Doctors or downloading their FREE eBook at Salad Recipes For Love and Health.

During their distinguished careers the Doctors have received some 60 local, state, and national awards; published nearly 200 articles and manuscripts; delivered over 1000 speeches, workshops and public presentations; traveled throughout the world; and appeared on radio and television and in the print media. Dr. Charles D. Schmitz is Dean and Professor of Family and Counseling Therapy at the University of Missouri in St. Louis and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz is President of Successful Marriage Reflections, LLC.

Additional Resources covering Love can be found at:

Website Directory for Love
Articles on Love
Products for Love
Discussion Board
Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz, the Official Guides To Love