Female Coworker Flirting With My Husband: Husband Too Close To Female Coworker

Although emotional cheating also known as an 'emotional affair' or 'emotional infidelity' might at first seem less damaging than a full blown physical affair it is still a form of being unfaithful in a marriage. If it is not nipped in the bud early it can develop further and eventually destroy the marriage.

If you feel you might be the victim of an emotional affair then you may be able to relate to the following scenario.

While Mary's husband Steve was at the gym, she checked his work phone. Mary couldn't resist checking while he wasn't around. She would never dream of spying, but lately she had been feeling uneasy as he seemed to be getting a lot of text messages at weekends and late in the evening. He never normally got work calls or texts at the weekend. When she checked his messages just for reassurance, she felt sick.... the same woman's name appeared, over and over again. Alarm bells went off in her head and although she felt a bit ashamed she went ahead and read the private texts. They were definitely not work related - they seemed like they were from a very close friend (one that she had never heard of) and were affectionate in tone and always ended in kisses.

When Mary confronted her husband, he shouted at her and said that Mary was invading his privacy and accused her of spying. Mary broke down in tears and demanded to know who this other woman was. He got defensive and said she was just a friend and that she listened to his problems - something that he felt Mary didn't do anymore. He insisted that nothing physical had happened or ever would happen, but Mary did not feel reassured at all. The other woman's messages seemed flirtatious and cheeky and Mary was sure she would not send texts like that unless she was getting the same back from Steve. She had no proof that anything physical was happening but all the same she felt worried, insecure and started to lose her self-confidence.

Like Mary many husbands and wives are tempted to check up on spouse's messages, phone calls and emails if they suspect an affair. Cell phones, internet chat rooms, email and instant messaging online all now make it much easier for a spouse to be secretly unfaithful. When you find out that your husband has developed a close 'friendship' with another woman - who could be a friend or work colleague - it can make you feel pretty uncomfortable.

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Discovering an emotional affair can cause you to feel:

1. Anger - That your husband seems to spend far more time talking to or being with the other person than they do you.

2. Defense - You feel upset that your husband has verbally attacked you for "spying" on him.

3. Sadness - Your husband is sharing a close bond with someone else and not you.

4. Guilt - You may feel ashamed and feel that you have broken your husband's trust by "snooping" into his personal things.

5. Neglect - You realise your relationship with your husband has become dull - the only news you share is about what the kids did, what groceries you need or what's on TV.

If your husband has a very personal, fairly intense relationship with another woman then the relationship has probably become an emotional affair. The reason this hurts and feels so uncomfortable is that you quite rightly feel that this kind of intimacy - sharing innermost thoughts and feelings - rightfully belongs to you, his wife and not her!

When confronted about having an emotional affair the husband usually then tries to make his behaviour seem perfectly reasonable by saying "What!? Am I not allowed to have a friend of the opposite sex now?" and as a result many wives back down as they don't know what to say in response. If a husband goes outside the marriage to seek fulfillment for something he feels is missing in his marriage - whether sexual or emotional in nature, I consider that emotional cheating on the intimate relationship he should be sharing with his wife.

"How do I know if my husband is having an emotional affair?"

Compared to sexual cheating, the definition of 'emotional cheating' can seem far less clear so to help you work out if your husband is involved in an emotional affair you need to ask yourself the following:

Does he conceal the relationship or is he open about it? Does he say for example, "Oh I just got a text from Janet - she's so caring and such a good listener" and then he reads the message to you? Pretty unlikely I would guess. If he is cheating then he will know that his behavior is wrong and so he will try to hide it from you. And then when you eventually discover his emotional affair he will spring in to attack for 'snooping' on him and becomes defensive "she's just a friend!".

"Is my husband is having a physical relationship her?"

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Without actually catching him red-handed it is very hard to tell if the emotional affair has crossed the line and become a physical relationship - especially as he will probably go to great lengths to conceal it.

If he is having an emotional affair then clearly there has been a breakdown in the intimacy level in your marriage and so there is a chance that he may want to take it further. If your husband can admit to having an emotional affair you can then at least both try to repair the intimacy within your relationship and work to save your marriage by starting with these steps:

Step 1: Assess Your Emotional Connection

Firstly it is not your fault - there is no excuse for him to have an affair whether sexual or emotional. You need to both sit down and look at your relationship. Where do you both see areas of neglect, do you communicate much and if so what do you talk about (e.g. things that really matter or just day-to-day banality)?

Your husband went outside of the marriage to find the feeling of being "special" with another woman. So an honest review of your marriage will show you both how you can make your partner feel special and be more communicative. Both of you need to be working at fixing your relationship.

Step 2: Understand the Types of Communication

Don't forget that as well as verbal communication (talking) there is non-verbal e.g. sharing time with your husband, watching a movie together, hugging, flirting with your partner while out on a dinner date, or leaving a card on the kitchen table to say "I love you".

You need to strengthen your intimate bond by trying different types of 'communication'. Can you remember the last time you held hands and watched the sunset together or went for a walk in the forest, or had an animated discussion about a book you both read and love? If not then this would be a good time to make an effort to do more activities that involve you being together.

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We have heard a lot about divorce already and on how people would find it as the last resort to their partnership problem. It just so sad on how people would start to let go of the love and the promises they had in the holy matrimony. A lot would say that all these happen because of the lost of spark and happiness in their partnership lives. If that would be the case, the only thing you got to do is to take hold of the fire and passion of love for you partners. What you need are a lot of advices, strategies and tips on how to save your marriage for you to keep the feeling burning. I understand that with all the years of being together you might get cold with each other for a moment. Things as these are just normal. But though it is, both of you should do everything not to keep that feeling forever. Do not let go the hands of your beloved too easily. Put in mind that marriage is no play anymore. It is your life's part where understanding, trust, love and acceptance must prevail.

Though there would be some who would say that it is really difficult doing things on how to save your marriage, still there would be ways for both of your love to burst once again. Because of the demand of the people for it, there would already be a lot of tips which will be an answer for the matter. You could find it in books, mouths of your friends and consultants, and even millions of them from the internet. You should already do things to save your marriage though you might just found circumstances early still. Both of you should be working for your marriage as soon as possible so that things as these would effectively work.

o You could start everything with a weekly date. Put some touch of uniqueness every time you will be having that. In that way, you will be adding spice and glitters in your marriage life for you two not to get bored with your own selves.

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o Try to spend time together in a peaceful room. Just you and your partner. It would be good for your body being away from any stress and that would also be very good for your marriage too.

o You can put your sweetest feelings in a letter. Letters are still one of the sweetest ways on how you could express your love to your spouse so why not try use the stuff to improve your relationship.

o Commit one evening for you and your partner to talk about the things you want to do in your future. In that way, you could already have time together and at the same time showing how important he or she is in your future.

o Devote at least ten minutes for you and your partner to talk sweetly about anything you like. Take the activity as you watch sun set, or as you walk together or even over dinner. I assure you that through that, your marriage will surely grow.

Doing things on how to save your marriage is surely not an easy thing. But if both of you successfully did it, with your partner on your side, everything would be all worth it.

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A marriage crisis can develop in almost any relationship. Every marriage is at risk of difficulties. Sometimes, those problems end in divorce, but there are marriages that turn out to be long-lasting, stable, empowering love affairs. What does it take to preserve your marriage in the face of serious difficulties? Let's look at three important traits.

A Willingness To Take Action

Too many marriages end in divorce simply because no one was willing to do anything until the situation escalated out of control. Instead of resolving issues and taking action to save the marriage, the partners sat on their hands hoping things would get better and hiding from the circumstances.

You need to deal with a marriage crisis. You need to do something. You can't combat an impending divorce with wishful thinking, hoping and crossed fingers. The marriages that withstand crises all have something in common. They featured at least one spouse who was willing to stand up and step forward, taking action in the face of trouble. You can be that person for your marriage. You need to be that person if you want your marriage to last.

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A Good Plan For Dealing With A Marriage Crisis

If you're marriage is in trouble, you need to have a good plan of action to set things right. The stakes are incredibly high. The most important relationship of your life is at stake. Your vows, your commitment, your heart and your future are in play. This is not a time for following gut instincts or for rolling the dice on you hunches.

There are professionals out there, experts who dedicate their lives to studying marriages and human relationships. They aren't just ivory tower academicians. They're hands-on professionals who have developed working blueprints to address a marriage crisis successfully. Take their sage advice. Learn about methods that really work and follow expert advice and plans. That's your best hope to save your marriage.

Tenacity And A Strong Sense Of Purpose

You're wiling to act and you have a plan. You're in a good position to save your marriage, but you will need one other trait. You need to be tenacious. You'll need a motivated, never surrender attitude and some serious positive thinking. Marriages can be saved. They are saved every day. That doesn't mean it's always easy, though.

Be prepared for occasional set backs. They're inevitable. You won't be able to resolve every marriage crisis with the snap of a finger. If you remain committed, though, with your mind and heart focused on the important purposes underlying your desire to save your marriage. With a clear sense of purpose, you can do it.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

Click here to save your marriage and rebuild it into a more connected, satisfying relationship.

Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

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