How to Strengthen Your Energetic Boundaries So You can Stop Feeling Drained and Depressed – Part II

In part I of this series we discussed the attributes of being and empath or a Highly Sensitive Person, and how to know when you are being impacted by other peoples’ energies, and why this happens on an energetic level.

Now let’s address some tools to help you better manage your boundaries and energy so you don’t get “slimed’ with other people’s heavy sticky emotional sludge in the first place.

Our personal energy field acts as a communications device, transmitting and receiving energy and information about our surroundings. The natural distance for our personal energy field is approximately an arm’s length out in a circle all around us. It is what defines where you end and someone else begins.

Many people, especially “sensitives”, have unknowingly extended their personal energy field much farther than that, for several reasons I had mentioned:

- to be compassionate and feel/heal/help others
- to feel more in control of their space
- or protectively to want a “heads-up” about what may be coming their way so they can anticipate and better defend themselves.

Wild animals often have very large energy fields, and prey animals like horses often do as well. When I work with animals I am very sensitive to entering their “space” and it helps tremendously to more quickly establish a good rapport as they appreciate the chance to adjust to my presence and feel safer before I expect them to receive my touch or healing energy.

How it impacts you to have an extended open personal energy field

Our personal energy field (aka aura or bio-field) is not static and can be extended to encompass a large room or retracted very tightly right up to the skin. You might prefer a large open energy field, as it feels more welcoming and less rigid than a tighter, close field.

However, when your bio-field is quite large and far-flung, it means that you are running everyone else’s energy through your own field. Translation—everyone is in your space, and you are experiencing their thoughts and emotions running through your body and aura directly!!!

This is a major reason why so many sensitive people are overwhelmed with other people’s emotions and feel zapped and emotionally drained when around others, especially in larger crowds and public places.

The great news: We can learn how to play with our energy field and make it more appropriate for different situations. For example, when you live in a rural place, there may be no need to contract your field in the way that you might choose living in city and riding on a packed subway.

4 Energy Alchemy Techniques to Clear other People’s Emotions and Thoughts

Remember, thoughts are things, and what you think about expands. “As you think, so shall you be.” So when you intend and visualize the following tools, know that you are instantly impacting your own energy and experience.

NOTE: You do not need to know “how” any of this takes place. You are the captain and are taking charge of your Being and leaving the details of how that happens to the same Source that manages how you breathe.

1) Call in your Personal Energy Field

Though you may not have consciously extended your field, you can consciously retract it. You are in command of your being. So, command your field to come in towards you as tightly as you desire all the way to the edge of your body if you are right up against someone. This does take a bit of practice to perfect and hold, but you will become more skilled at this in time. It is especially helpful when attending large meetings or going to public places, but can be used anytime you want to gather up your personal field so others are not energetically in your space.

TIP: Practice this often BEFORE you really need it!

2) Grounding or Earthing

Just like electrical appliances need grounding, the human body can be stabilized by consciously connecting your energy to the earth. While you can ground using the visual of roots growing from your feet, I find grounding from the 1st chakra at the base of the spine into the center of the earth, using the image of a tube to have more potency.

3) Release

Make the intention to release all energy that is no longer serving you, and is not for your Highest Good. You can send it right down your Grounding Tube for recycling and transmuting! The time needed here could be a few moments or up to twenty minutes or more; it depends on how often you “take out the garbage!” I do this many times per day and now it only takes a moment.

4) Clearing with a Rose

A rose is a perfect tool here as it has the highest frequency on the planet; and many people are using and therefore empowering this popular image for energy clearing. Additionally, it has a built-in grounding line in the long stem! The image of a rose can be used to make separations and clear negative or challenging energy in specific circumstances like conversations.

Visualize a long-stem rose midway between you and the other person. Now command the rose to harmonize your energies and to absorb or clear any energy that is in disharmony with you.

For example, I hadn’t realized the extent that I had been feeling both my emotions and others, especially those I am close to. My husband and I were slipping quickly into an argument one night and I thought it was potentially a real deal-breaker. On a scale of 1-10, it was a 9.5 doozy!

Luckily I had just learned the Rose technique to make separations and unbeknownst to him, I “inserted” a rose between us on the couch and began clearing. Instantly I could feel most of the upset was on his side of the rose, and I was now down to a 2. While I could “feel” all his emotions, I had been doubling his strong emotions plus my own, and thought we were really on thin ice. Within a few moments, I was able to easily detach and step quickly out of his story, and diffuse my own upset, possibly saving our marriage.

Claiming Your Super-Power

Now that you have some great techniques to more easily manage your energy and your super sensitivity, it is time to fully claim your Super-Power. For truly, heightened sensitivity is the hallmark of greater awareness and higher consciousness.

Here are some of the many benefits of being Highly Sensitive:

In the Workplace: this gift allows you to know/sense/feel what other people are thinking or feeling without being told. They may not even realize yet what they are experiencing!

So with your boss, co-workers, or clients, when you pick up something energetically you can address this directly or indirectly to help them feel safer and let them know that you understand their unique feelings or perspective.

When making presentations or sales, you can more fluidly handle objections that have not even been raised; and anticipate reactions as you may actually feel the energy shift before they even acknowledge it mentally.

In decision-making, your sensitivity can serve you really well as you begin to navigate how you feel when something is aligned with you or not. You have a much better navigation system as a result, and can avoid costly mistakes and time wasted going down a path that is not in your or your business’ best interests.

Many successful business leaders have channeled their sensitivity and “follow their gut” in hiring, market trends, who to partner with, and all levels of decision-making.

Benefits in Relationships: your sensitivity allows you to be more skillful at sorting out what is yours and also what is not yours. You can speak more clearly about what you feel is going on under the surface, both for you and others, which can totally break open a pattern that perhaps was never seen or understood with that depth of clarity before.

When you use the Rose tool to make separations, and realize that what you are feeling may not be yours, it is easier to be more detached and therefore not so reactive. Many arguments have been dissipated in this way, and have led to major personal breakthroughs and much happier relationships.

Benefits with Animals: When you are with animals, your high sensitivity will allow you to feel with more clarity what is going on with them. While it takes some practice to listen on a telepathic level, being sensitive to energy and emotion will give you a heads up when something is brewing with your beloved animals well before there are more obvious symptoms. This gives you the opportunity to begin addressing any upsets or imbalances before they progress into illness or behavior problems.

Benefits as a Healer, Bodyworker, Coach or Health Practitioner: increased intuition about the underlying issues and root causes of your client’s upsets and illnesses are invaluable for the client’s awareness of the deeper reasons they are out of balance and struggling, and may offer great insight for them to more quickly and directly deal with the problems.

Each one of these energy alchemy tools has been priceless for transforming my personal life and relationships and I use them daily. I also teach them to all my clients, and have created a more in-depth audio training program entitled “Transform your Super-Sensitivity into Your SUPER-POWER…So You Can Stop Energy Drains, Strengthen Your Personal Boundaries and Take Back Your Power!”

So the first thing I want you to do to consciously claim your “Sensitivity Super Power” is to become aware of how you think about yourself. Do you complain that you are cursed being so sensitive? It may be a good time to restate this self-limiting concept and begin to unwrap the precious gifts of increased clarity, empowerment, and connectedness that are awaiting you.