I Am So Miserable In My Marriage: How To Overcome Loneliness In Marriage

The thought of your marriage failing can be so overwhelming and scary, you are too afraid to manifest the reality and take action. Considering we are an imperfect people, it is only logical to think that our marriages will become strained at one time or another. However, in knowing this we should also be aware that these are the moments in marriage that can matter most. These moments are the opportunities for the bond in your marriage to grow, or mark the moments your marriage began to fail.

Reconnecting to Partner in a Failing Marriage

1. Focus on Attraction - #1 In Ways to Save a Failing Marriage

Reflect on the positive things your marriage was first built on, such as remembering why what brought you two together. Focus on the character traits that attracted you to your partner. For example, sense of humor, uniqueness, common interest, physical appearance, or even any of the smallest things you can think of. Make an effort to rekindle that romance and reconnect with your partner. It's easy to get distracted with the everyday stress of life and displace these feelings.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

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2. Touch Just To Touch - #2 In Ways to Save a Failing Marriage

Make it an obvious point to touch your partner, just for the sake of touching. Emotional resilience sometimes keep us from getting close to the ones we care most for, but that it doesn't mean that the desire to do so isn't there. These are times when unconditional love exposes itself in marriages, and this alone can in some cases turn a failing marriage around. Even something as simple as brushing against your wife/husband as you pass one another in the hall way. Small efforts can often times yield huge results, actions get results.

3. Kissing Your Partner -#3 In Ways to Save a Failing Marriage

Kissing is much different than touching your wife/husband. Kissing someone is no accident, it is a display of intentional affection in your marriage. Kissing can lead to a unforgettable passionate moments. And in an instance, the miserable marriage you thought was falling apart, has managed to save itself.

4. A Fresh Start Everyday - #4 In Ways to Save a Failing Marriage

Strive to allow each new day to be a fresh start in your marriage, don't make your marriage miserable by adding yesterday's short comings to each new day. We are all human, but in the institution of marriage we sometimes hold our partners to unrealistic standards.

In conclusion, we all know that in life our efforts do not always give us the results we would like to have. Without ever trying we will never know what results our efforts could deliver to us in return. Walking away from a marriage that has failed, no matter what caused it to fail, is never easy. However, if you take the initiative now, and at least try to save your marriage. I truly do believe with success or failure, you will be able to go on knowing you tried your very best.

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People go into marriage expecting it to be OUT OF THIS WORLD. However, often we hear, "Houston, we have a problem". Or maybe it is in Denver, Memphis or somewhere in North Dakota. Marriages start going out of orbit and people start seeking the easiest way out- divorce. However, marriages usually can be fixed, if the people remember a few basic principles. These principles include remembering the wedding vows of commitment and love, taking time to talk to one another and to God, and learning to manage money.

If someone asked you why you married, you would probably say because of love.
Marriages often start with passionate-Eros-love. As time goes on, love may become more blasé-as Greeks call it-philia love. A successful marriage is one where the couple has sacrificial love or agape kind of endearment. This is the kind that is like the Energizer Bunny-it keeps on giving and giving and giving. It involves remembering the wedding vow of commitment. AN OUT OF THIS WORLD MARRIAGE comes when couples continue to have love even though the responsibly of the marriage may be one-sided because of health, family issues or separation such as the military. When the marriage starts going off course, the man and woman need to sit together and recall the good times they've had together and allow their minds to spin with love. Love, forgiveness and understanding can blast through time and space to prevent the disaster of a divorce.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

Communication with one another and God is essential to AN OUT OF THIS WORLD MARRIAGE. Couples need to discuss the things that are causing tension. Family is a problem that often causes friction in marriage. The rearing of children or the interference of in-laws can create havoc with marital bliss. Peace of mind and solutions come when a couple prays together. Leave love notes under a spouse's plate, call and leave a phone message to say, "I love you". Text your spouse, "I'm praying for you". Send an unexpected gift for no reason. Set aside some time just for the two of you. Face to face encounters are feasible when couples budget their time as well as their incomes.

Money problem is considered number one in family units. Couples should file a budget plan and manage the income with a home computer bookkeeping system. When a spouse deviates from the plan, adjustments should be made together to correct it. Calculate the amount of money needed for debts and credit card charges. Use only one or two credit cards. Consider credit card outlays deleted from the income like cash. Daily record all monetary outflow. Discuss which spouse should be responsible for this daily record. Locate a bin or container in a central location for the other spouse to place receipts. Periodically, both should review the financial records. Place both names on spending and saving accounts. There should be no "his account" and "her account". Remain as debt free as probable and always talk about large expenditures before purchasing. AN OUT OF THIS WORLD MARRIAGE is possible when couples practice the principle that they learned in kindergarten: share with one another.

AN OUT OF THIS WORLD MARRIAGE takes a lifetime to achieve. Successful astronauts fly to the moon or the space station and return within a few days. Successful marriage partners travel through life until one is deceased. A successful marriage is one that can fix problems. A successful marriage is one that is OUT OF THIS WORLD.

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Having learnt the five basic needs of each spouse in a marriage (if you haven't, then you should), it is now time to work on yourself to see where you require help in other for you to meet these needs in your spouse. The following four steps will assist the couple to satisfy each others need once you are honest with yourselves in handling them.

Step One- For Wife
a Identify and list characteristics that meet these needs and help build your relationship.
b Identify and list the characteristics that can break down your marriage that you cannot admire in him
c You will be surprised at how many things, are on your list that you admire about your husband, but never express.

Step Two- For Husbands
A Husband, make a list of how your wife helps build sexual fulfilment, recreational companionship, stays attractive, gives domestic support and admiration.
B Then, list characteristics that break down your marriage.

Step Three- For Both
A Choose a time to compare the lists, be encouraged by all the positive things you do.
B Don't feel like a failure, just make the adjustment. You will see that both husband and wife will agree together to overcome characteristics that destroy admiration for each other.
C There are certain habits that may be hindrance to good relationship. Talk about it and decide that you want to change.
D Plan the strategy you will use to change that habit, follow that strategy.
E Evaluate that strategy to see if the behavior has changed.
F Keep practicing your efforts to improve.

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Final Step
A Begin to admire each other, teach yourself to speak words of praise. At first, if you have not been doing so, it may seem awkward and uncomfortable, but it will become smoother and more spontaneous.
B Make effort to reduce criticism and learn to give feedback in the right spirit, honoring him: to honor him means to attach a high value to him, he is more valuable than anything else you have.
C Building self- respect in our husband is a ministry. You can have tremendous input into your husband through admiration and praise.
D Your husband's self- esteem is fragile, you don't ever want to quench it. When your husband fails, you fail, when he succeeds, you succeed. Learn to be true "help Meet" for your husband.

It should be noted that, no situation is hopeless. Everyone can create a successful marriage. It will happen as each person individually dedicates himself or herself to need of their spouse.

Don't say you don't have time to spend with each other. You must work everything around your marriage; make time to be together as a couple and as a family.

The road to marriage success/marital happiness starts from the time when young people decide that they are ready for marriage. It is at this point that they need to know a lot about what they are getting into.

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Creating healthy, passionate relationships does require some commitment to both self-improvement and improvement as a team. If it were as easy as just deciding to do it and then doing it, you would be the perfect weight, keep all of your New Year's resolutions, and be living happily ever after in your relationship. Alas, there is no magic wand, no fairy godmother, and no genie to grant you three wishes. Since it is up to you, what do you need to do to make it happen?

Just like in work and your personal life, if you want to get serious about improvement, you must begin with a vision of what you want your relationship to look like. Careful! Before you get overly excited about giving your spouse a makeover, step away from the canvas. You want to co-create a vision with your spouse of your ideal relationship.

Once you've created the vision you both are please with, set small goals to turn your vision into reality. Remember, just as you cannot expect to train for a marathon in a weekend, you cannot expect your new vision of your relationship to magically appear overnight. Celebrate the small changes and keep working toward your goals a bit at a time.

What if your spouse already left you? Here's how to get them back.

To keep the momentum going, set dates in your calendar to revisit the goals and map your progress in creating your vision of your life together. It is extremely important to have fun doing this! This project of co-creation should be a joy for both of you. That's how you stay motivated when things don't go exactly as planned.

Remember, your vision is much more powerful when you put it in writing. It must be something you both feel passionate about. The problem with "happily ever after" is the expectation that it comes to you without you lifting a finger. Once you realize you can be an active participant in co-creating your own "happily ever after" with the one you love, you can see your dreams come true.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

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