I Support My Husband Financially: My Husband Makes No Money

Are you and your spouse worried about what's happening with your savings, your pension, your children's college funds, or just staying employed? The Dow Jones is under 10,000 and European banks sound as shaky as the US banks. Do you find yourself fearful of your futures together? Do you find yourselves disagreeing with your partner about how to weather this financial meltdown? Do you find yourselves arguing because one of you makes more money and feels like they have more control over how money is spent? When money gets tight as a result of reduced income or increased mortgage payments and is combined with financial fears of the future, those old money arguments (my money vs. your money) may be causing you problems again. It is time for the two of you to have discussions again about money.

In his book Love & Money, Jeff Opdyke says: "It's not really about the money. It's about creating another level of intimacy in your relationship and bestowing trust on each other." He further recommends joint accounts for couples which explicitly demonstrates the trust you have with your spouse.

When we keep secrets from our spouse about how much we make, how we spend money, or even how much money we have, this indicates a measure of distrust in the other person. When times are tough like now, you need to trust and have faith in your legal and romantic partner. All your money and all your debts are consider joint by the state. If you are not considering them joint, you are losing out. You lose resources that your partner brings to solving financial problems. You lose a feeling of honesty about yourself. And you lose some ability to manage your family finances in the best way possible.

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If the two of you are not quite ready to combine your accounts, at least try to agree on and be committed to the following:

1. Agree to live within your means, so that expenses do not exceed your income.

2. Agree to open, honest communication about money.

3. Promise not to blame one another, judge each other, or keep secrets about money.

4. Be prepared to listen to your partner and understand their perspective.

You both need to be fully aware of the family gross and net income, to know where household (and individual) money goes each month and to know how much debt you have and the interest costs you are paying.

If you are unable to have a frank and open discussion about your money with your spouse, you may benefit from seeing a marriage counselor. The National Registry of Marriage Friendly Therapists (www.marriagefriendlytherapist.com) is a good resource for finding a therapist who is invested in helping you save your marriage. If you are unable to curb your spending, you might consider Debtors Anonymous, an organization for people trying to reduce debt and regain solvency. If you need a housing counselor or help with your mortgage, go to the web site of the US Department of Housing and Urban Development (www.hud.gov) and click on the Hope for Homeowners link.

It's important to realize you are not alone. Many couples and families are struggling. Don't let your marriage be a casualty of the worst financial disaster most of us have ever seen. You and your spouse are in this together. Get the help you need to keep your marriage stable and safe.

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From the beginning of time, marriage was one of those institutions that was respected and treated with pride. If you happen to be in the position where your spouse wants to divorce you, you are probably worrying about that divorce rate and thinking that there may be no hope for your union. However, the mere fact that you are looking for advice means that you believe something will work. You deserve to be congratulated because this is not something easy to do especially if you are the only one who wants to see your marriage work.

The pain and heartache that you may be experiencing now have been experienced by everybody in your position, including myself. It can be very devastating to know that your spouse wants to leave and you want to keep the marriage going. And because you want it to work, you sacrifice yourself in every regard, but it just does not seem to be enough. In my case, I started to become desperate when I realized my self sacrificial efforts were not making a difference. And unfortunately, this was the worst thing that I could have done.

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When I started to become desperate, my emotions got the better of me and I started to behave irrationally. I would cry and plead with my husband to stay with me, which was absolutely the worst thing that I could do. Instead of bringing him back to me, it started to push him further away. Begging and pleading will only make you look desperate and pathetic, which is the last thing your spouse wants to see you looking like at a time like this.

The more you allow your emotions to control your reaction to your spouse is the worse off your situation will be. Do not allow yourself to act in the way that I did. Refrain from appearing desperate and you will have the opportunity to revive your marriage and continue to live a good and happy life with your spouse. Once you are able to contain your emotions, you will be on the right path to saving your marriage.

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When you start out in married life, sex is a huge part of your relationship. Inevitably, though, over the years this desire lessens, although intimate relations remain a crucial part of a close relationship. Have you ever wondered what would happen to a marriage if one of the partners became physically unable to consummate the relationship? It happens to couples all the time, and although you might think that that would put an end to the marriage, most often it does not. A sexless marriage can be sustained, and both partners can be happy with the arrangement. After all, there are other intimate ways to be together without actually completing the sex act.

As couples live together over the years, they become closer. They understand each other's wants and needs and know what it takes to make them happy. They also care deeply about the well-being of their mate and are willing to do whatever it takes to keep their union solid. If that means giving up the sex act due to ill health, then they adjust their relationship accordingly. Sometimes, however, the idea of a sexless marriage can make one or both partners feel that they should dissolve their marriage. One spouse may feel that they can't live the rest of their life without real sex, and the other may well feel that they are depriving their spouse of something vital by staying with them.

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If either or both of you are feeling stressed because of the turn your marriage has taken, you need to consider contacting a marriage coach. This is a person who has the information you need to deal with the transition your marriage is going to have to make. He can teach you techniques for feeling closer and having a great deal of intimacy even if you aren't able to do so the way you always used to. By using the strategies he can teach you, you'll learn to have a fulfilling life in which you'll be missing nothing. You have to admit that it's a much better approach than having lovers on the side since your spouse is the person that you love with all of your heart.

Don't be ashamed to take your real feelings to your marriage coach. He realizes that the lack of sex is a crisis for a lot of people but that your spouse's health is of the utmost importance. You can even find a free consultation online in order to test the waters before diving in.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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I was reading through an article on how people can ensure their marriage is unhappy. Apart from being eye opening, it helped me realize where people go wrong to arrive at an unhappy marriage. First, a marital union that has no joy or vitality is referred to as an unhappy marriage. The only person who would wish for it is one who has intentions of leaving. We all want to be happy whether in marriage or out of marriage. Today, many people are in marriages that are suffocating them. It is not easy to work on a marriage where your partner is not willing to try. However, in every situation, there is always hope and, you can always make things work for you. It is good to start with what causes the problem in marriage. People can become unhappy due to many things. Lack of proper communication will leave couple feeling lonely in marriage. Issues of adultery are also very disappointing and will cause many to be unhappy. This is because trust is broken and returning to the place you were before can prove to be very challenging. Money issues will make a marriage very unhappy. Usually, when there is no agreement of how money should be spent.

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Many couples become unhappy because they do not have that money in the first place. Poverty is one of the leading causes of strife in families. When things are alright financially, the marriage is more vibrant. Other issues include lack of satisfaction sexually. This is another leading cause of unhappiness. Couples become too familiar with each other until they no longer find any pleasure in sex. It is really a sad tale observing what marriages have to grapple with everyday. The good news is that you can do something about it. If you are in the marriage for good times and bad, you will find a way to make it work. First, establish what the particular cause of the unhappy marriage. All couples have unique problems and, you should always analyze your case independently. If your spouse has been laid off and as a result you have argued because money is not enough, stop in your tracks.

You need to show him or her love. Love is the only thing that can solve your problem. Do not appear to be judging them or looking down on them. Change your attitude and assure them you are in solidarity. Most partners will put each other down as a way of venting their anger or disappointment. However, both of you have to come up with a good plan for your survival. In cases of infidelity, you need to a lot of willingness to work things out. The end result will have to be forgiveness. It is not easy forgiving someone who put your union to shame. However, with the realization that every man or woman will error at some point, you can forgive and forget. Maybe it will be you begging forgiveness the next time. If you prepare and open your mind to the reality of problems in marriage, you will have an easier time dealing with some issues that can prove inevitable.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com