Are you comfy with the process of creating what you desire? Aware that you do it every moment of every day? Everything in life up to this point, and forever moving forward, is, was, and will be created by you. Not just some of it, ALL of it! YOU’RE DOIN’ IT!

Question: Does it seem as challenging for you at times as it does for me? Recently, I pondered why it seems more challenging to create items on My Dream List than to create something simple like My Favorite Dessert – Red Velvet Cake.

In recording the process, the simplicity of creating My Favorite Dessert – Red Velvet Cake versus the actual experience, here’s what I discovered:

Red Velvet Cake – The SIMPLE Version

Step One: Have desire. My desire is to create and enjoy every morsel of Red Velvet Cake.

Step Two: Ponder and enjoy ALL possibilities for creation. Ask and receive, right? Here are a few choices:
• Go to a bakery and buy it.
• Ask Heather to make her “kick ass” cake for me.
• Use a Duncan Hines boxed version.
• Make it from scratch.

Step Three: CHOOSE a possibility. Go for it. For adventure and challenge, I decide to make it from scratch. Now what?
• Find a simple recipe in my cookbooks.
• Call Heather for her “kick ass” recipe.
• Armed with recipes, go to the store for ingredients.
(• For one small moment, ALMOST wimp out and buy Duncan Hines.)

Step Four: Do it! Let creativity begin. Jump in, enjoy the process, ask for help and adjust along the way. My kitchen is a disaster area! Oops, I mean… “creativity area.” I’m off and cooking with no clue how it will turn out, but who cares? I’m having fun, cooking and learning, learning and cooking, licking cake and icing along the way, having a blast.

Step Five: Savor the fruits (in this case, the desserts) of your labor. Share the experience. I invite Larry, the boyfriend, to share the experience of delighting in every delicious morsel of my Red Velvet Cake. He tells me over and over how awesome I am. I am complete!

Now, folks, this was the SIMPLE version of creating. The same principles apply in all situations, whether creating a Big Dream or My Favorite Dessert. However, the actual version that follows is what usually happens:

Red Velvet Cake – The ACTUAL Version

Step One: “OMG! I want Red Velvet Cake.”

Step Two: “Bake it or buy it?” Pretty neutral question, yes? But before I choose, my mind is off...

“WHY do I want cake? It’s not my birthday. I’ll get FAT! Do I need it? Am I hungry? Dare I bake it myself? Why don’t I buy it? How much will it COST? Can I afford it? I have so many cookbooks! What a waste. I never use them. I SHOULD. I’ll get Heather’s recipe. It’s kick ass. What if she wants to taste mine? I’ll be embarrassed. I can’t COMPARE. I’ll look stupid. Even Larry will laugh. Everyone knows how to bake a Red Velvet Cake but me. I’ll just buy it, dammit. No, I NEED to do this. If I don’t I’ll never be whole and complete. What if I screw up? I’ll have WASTED time and money. I’ll NEVER be a cake maker.”

Judgment, judgment, compare, compare! WHERE did the “enjoy ALL possibilities” go?

Step Three: “Okay, suck it up. Buy the ingredients and make it!” And here I go again. (This is exhausting!)

“Buying it is the easy way out, something for nothing. I’ll be a BETTER person if I PULL MYSELF UP BY MY BOOTSTRAPS AND JUST DO IT!”

I look through the cookbooks and the chatter continues:

“Oh, cook that I am not, why so many books? I’m obsessive compulsive. Too many recipes. How do I choose? I’ll use Heather’s! YES!”

I call Heather. The entire time she’s explaining how to make the cake, I’m off:

“She thinks I’m stupid. She’s laughing at me. It must be like hers.” (Overwhelm and anxiety!)

To the store I go, overwhelmed by the obnoxious amount of ingredients needed.

“How do I choose?” (Indecision, paralysis.) “What to do? I’ll call Larry. He’ll tell me. I can’t do it. He’ll assure me I can do it. I need that!”

Folks, are you getting the picture? Where did PASSION and DESIRE go?

Step Four: Beginning with enthusiasm and a li’l apprehension, I’m off and cookin’. Turn on a li’l music, get focused and off I go, into the flow of making my Red Velvet Cake. I’m baking and stirring, stirring and baking, havin’ a blast... creatin’ my desire.

OMG! We’re back to PASSION and DESIRE! Not so fast...

Step Five: Done, I’m ready to call Larry. My cake rocks! And it begins again:

“Will Larry like my cake? He’ll tell me it’s delicious. He loves me! Do I believe him? Is he telling the truth? If he thinks it’s good, I’ll know I’m good. Larry’s a great cook. He knows. He can be the judge.”

Whew! I love The Simple Version, unfortunately, I’m all too familiar with the Actual Version. How ‘about you?

Let’s keep it simple!

Desire, enjoy, choose possibility, flow with passion, and savor results. Sounds easy, doesn’t it? I don't know about you, but I’m tired and hungry. Red Velvet Cake, anyone?

Author's Bio: 

Tuck Self, The Rebel Belle, is a Southern voice for bold self-expression. As a coach, writer and speaker, she inspires women to wake up, crank it up, and squeeze the juice from life with passion, purpose, and a lot of play! Let The Rebel Belle guide you to freedom and bold self-expression. Visit to get your complimentary outline of The 7 Steps to Discovering Freedom – Full Out and On Your Terms!