Nearly everyone does battle with that pesky voice of
self-judgment and sabotaging put-downs that chatters
away in our heads.

And, in response to a recent teleseminar we gave titled
“The Fear of Being Fabulous” we received a request
from a participant who said:

“I would love to hear how you remove the head talk that keeps
you from being fabulous. I can get so far and then I'm stopped
by my head talk.”

Here’s our answer . . .

First, you’ll know it’s Head-Talk by the repetitive, nagging attack on who you are. Your self-respect and self-esteem can end up in the toilet. And you can end up on the edge of . . . well, for us it’s sometimes been the pothole from hell.

On the other hand, if you only hear a single reminder or even
a reprimand, that’s usually your wisdom giving you a heads-up
to watch out or correct for behavior that’s not in your best interest.

But Negative Head-Talk is relentless once it gets going.
Its job is to successfully bring you down and remind you of
your “proper” place.

What’s “proper” about being put down?

Well, you weren’t born turning yourself into a brick of
Swiss cheese, with more holes than substance. Right?

Somewhere along your life, probably earlier than later,
you were told negative stuff about who you are and
what you could accomplish and what you could have and
who you could be . . .

Even if you cannot now remember what it was or who said it.

Because if that hadn’t happened, there wouldn’t be any
Negative Scripts in your noggin’ that involuntarily blast
away at you as Negative Self-Talk.

So, what to do when that destructive force turns on you and
fills your head with lies . . .

1) Know they are lies.

2) Remember We’re On Your Side and we told you they’re lies.

3) Take yourself back to where they came from originally, and see if you can remember who told you those lies, when, and what for . . .

4) Then notice how, when that Negative Head-Talk takes over, you are still in allegiance to that person and that part of your history.

5) Know that even after you’ve got hold of its source, when the
Negative Self-Talk yammers at you you’ll be tempted to side
with IT instead of with YOU.

6) So that’s when you must practice taking your own side,
something you couldn’t do when you were younger. But you
must practice doing it now.

7) Make the commitment to break your allegiance. This won’t
happen without fear, pain, and sorrow. And there will be a sense
of loss. That’s expected and normal.

8) Know that this need to detach from the past is urgent. Because that’s the key to your well-being and a fabulous future.

9) Stay away from blame. That just keeps you stuck to the past.
And that’s just another, less obvious form of your allegiance.

10) Make the commitment to side with your desire. It’s your
desire that will carve out and light the path to the Positive
Head-Talk that you need as your powerful guide and ally.

Now, every time your Negative Head-Talk threatens, you have
your own internal arsenal to combat and overcome its power to
trash your well-being. With practice you’ll see that that voice
becomes weaker and less active.

And you will enjoy the freedom to be fabulously alive and
loving on your own terms.

Judith Sherven and Jim Sniechowski, producers of the "Bridging Heart and Marketing" Internet marketing conferences for the soft sell community invite you to grow your business by getting their
bonus audio "How To Build Your Soft Sell Marketing Platform." Just go to:

Author's Bio: 

Husband-and-wife psychology team and Internet marketers Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and Jim Sniechowski, Ph.D. pioneered a heart-based approach to Soft Sell Marketing. They’ve taken
that approach into producing “Bridging Heart and Marketing” - their unique, first-time-ever Internet marketing conference dedicated to the specific needs of the Soft Sell marketing community - for whom the typical hard sell "hype" doesn't fit.

By Soft Sell they’re referring to all the personal growth, healing and life-enhancement providers who market services and products. Unlike typical hard sell tactics, Soft Sell Marketing reinforces a caring and trustworthy relationship between marketers and the prospects and customers they want to attract.