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Blended Families Articles
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- Becoming an Effective Stepparent - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2010 from Emma CookToday’s family portrait is just as likely to display a blended family as a nuclear family. However, with over 75% of adults with children remarrying and 60% of those marriages ending in divorce, mostly because of the children, indicates that something is desperately wrong. Perhaps The Brady ...
Views: 1144(2 votes) - 3 Ways Your Self-Esteem May Be Sabotaging Your Relationships - by Submitted on Mar 07, 2010 from Rhonda Rabow3 Ways your self-esteem may be sabotaging your relationship When we think of relationships, we normally think of how our partner is treating us, whether we are happy and having our needs met. We tend to weigh the pros and cons of the relationship and then decide if it is working out or ...
Views: 3374(5 votes) - Disappointed Stepdad - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomDear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My wife and I have been married for two years. She has children from a previous marriage. Since, I don’t have any children, I was hoping to be a father figure to her kids. But it just hasn’t worked out that way. They reject any of my attempts to discipline them and ...
Views: 3689(2 votes) - Trouble With Adopted Kids in the Teen Years - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2009 from Mark GregstonWhen an adopted child enters the adolescent years and their thinking transfers from concrete to abstract, they might begin asking that unanswerable question, “Why did my mother give me up?” At a time that most kids are trying to “find themselves” and form a concept and understanding of who they ...
Views: 1306(3 votes) - Newly Single and the Holidays - by Submitted on Dec 01, 2009 from Meghan GehanFor those going through or recently divorced, the holidays add another layer of stress and anxiety: Will I need to interact with my ex? How do I handle the questions and advice from my family? How will I cope with being alone? How do I help my children through this time? This holiday season ...
Views: 1537(2 votes) - Family Relationship - by Submitted on Dec 01, 2009 from Carrie FlehartyIf we were to dissect the superficial front of families we would find, strife, jealousy, fear and hatred and no holiday within the family feels like a blessing. Love brought families together. Love that binds the family together is often taken for granted, by the parents and the siblings. ...
Views: 1453(1 vote) - Divorce to Remarriage: What Happens When You Rush to Wed The Second Time Around - by Submitted on Oct 27, 2009 from Alyssa Johnson50% of first marriages end in divorce. 75% of those divorcees will remarry. At least 60% of those remarriages will end in a re-divorce. Sobering statistics aren't they? But why are they this high? 50% of first marriages end in divorce I'm not even going to make a guess at the reason for ...
Views: 7342(1 vote) - Second Marriage Jitters - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomThe Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom My boyfriend and I are both divorced with children. We want to get married but we’re nervous about how to make it work. We both had terrible marriages the first go around. Now things will be even more challenging with the ...
Views: 3855(2 votes) - Thinking of Leaving? - by Submitted on Oct 08, 2009 from Adele CornishI regularly receive emails from men and women worldwide who are seeking advice on their blended family. These come to me here in New Zealand, a small but famous country southeast of Australia. Sometimes these emails are from individuals saying they want to leave their relationship. Here I ...
Views: 1408(6 votes) - Why Your Stepkids Hate You and What You Can Do About It - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie BlackwellI hear the same story time and again; “the kids liked me until I married their father.” So why is it that marriage often serves as the trigger, transforming once charming children into sullen stepkids? Many parents mistakenly believe that because the children are happy about the courtship that ...
Views: 5331(5 votes) - Stepfamilies and Schools: Bridging The Gap - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie BlackwellFall is upon us and families everywhere are sending their children back to school. According to many estimates, at least half of those children are engaged in a step-relationship of some sort. Yet, educational institutions lack a clear and consistent approach to managing non-custodial parents ...
Views: 1912(3 votes) - Roles Vs Place in The Family - by Submitted on Oct 01, 2009 from Michael NunnIt is important to understand the difference between roles in the family (environment) and someone's place in the family. All too often, people are ostracized from a family due to their inability or unwillingness to fulfil certain roles within it. Sometimes that inability or unwillingness may ...
Views: 1479(4 votes) - Celebrate National Adoption Awareness Month with the Perfect Personalized Gift - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2009 from Diana EnnenNovember is National Adoption Awareness Month, a time to be thankful for the joys adoption has brought to countless families and mindful of the many foster children in this country still waiting for families to call their own. If you or someone you know has been fortunate enough to build a ...
Views: 2246(1 vote) - Handling a Sensitive Situation - by Submitted on Sep 30, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomThe Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families Handling a Sensitive Situation Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My father has been married numerous times and he consistently has terrible taste in women. Most recently, I ran into my current “stepmother” at a restaurant having a romantic dinner with ...
Views: 1924(2 votes) - Even Step parents Need Time for Themselves - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress DudleyWhen you remarried and became a step parent you probably didn't realize how hard it would be to be a parent to a child that was not your own. It's tough- really tough,and you rarely receive any praise or thanks. You want to keep your spouse happy, their kids happy, your kids happy (if you have ...
Views: 1564(3 votes) - Signs of a Successful Blended Family - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley1-You and your spouse have clear house rules that apply to all family members Yes, this means that house rules don’t change when you are tired, or your spouse is out of town. Both biological children and stepchildren all follow the same rules. It really does help when the parents also follow ...
Views: 1830(4 votes) - 5 Golden Rules for Grandparents in a Blended Family - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress DudleyYou and your new spouse have married and blended your two families. Your parents are happy for you but unsure how to treat this new additions to the family. Here's a few golden rules to help them figure out how to respond to your newly blended family: 1- Treat every child the same Treat ...
Views: 4341(2 votes) - Top Ten Rules for Divorced Parents - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress Dudley1-All contact should be kept to a minimum One phone call a day is excessive, several text messages a day is extremely excessive. If you have a subject related to the kids- speak briefly and clearly about your expectations. Emails are better than phone calls, if your issue is not an ...
Views: 4626(4 votes) - Some Blended Families Just Don't Get Along - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2009 from Shirley Cress DudleyTwo adults marry and bring children into the new marriage. Some of these families get along wonderfully, and some families, who have been blended for years never accept each other as family. Here are some reasons a blended family may stay incompatible and not blend. The couple has children ...
Views: 8553(2 votes) - Blended Family Wedding Vows! - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2009 from Jody MaleyWe went to a beautiful wedding a few weeks ago for a couple we have been friends with for quite awhile. My girlfriend had two children from a previous marriage (one boy, one girl) & had told us to feel free to bring our own children if we came. This was a nice change for us since we have six ...
Views: 7222(1 vote) - Stepfamilies: The Difficult Ex and the Issue of Badmouthing - by Submitted on Aug 17, 2009 from Joan SarinThe “difficult ex” - I think every divorced couple goes through at least a stage of complaining about this. I hear it in nearly every couple I work with, and I had my share of this pain too. It seemed to me for years that my husband’s ex-wife looked right through me as if I didn’t exist, and ...
Views: 1914(1 vote) - ***Managing Your Stepfamily - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2009 from Garrett CoanIf you are a member of a stepfamily, you know how difficult it can be to integrate all of the new members and adjust to the new boundaries and rules. The following ideas may help you make a successful transition during this challenging process. Have patience. Establishing new families takes ...
Views: 1137(4 votes) - Throw Out Those OLD TAPES! - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2009 from Dan and Rebecca SnellTHROW OUT THOSE OLD TAPES, OLD STORIES, OLD MESSAGES! God doesn't make mistakes. YOU are not a mistake. Ask God to renew you. The past is past. Tomorrow is a fresh start! It's God's promise that His grace and mercy are new every morning! SCRIPTURE ASSURES US... 'Yet this I call to ...
Views: 1466(3 votes) - Getting Along with Family - by Submitted on Aug 03, 2009 from Deborah HillFamily members are often our greatest and most difficult ongoing teachers. A reader of my blog "Getting Along with Difficult People" (www.theawarenessinitiative.com/blog) asked how to get along with family members. I can't say that I've mastered the family conumdrum. In fact, I believe that ...
Views: 5876(3 votes) - It Takes Two to Tango - by Submitted on Aug 03, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomDear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, I’m so discouraged with my marriage that I almost don’t care anymore. I stayed in my first marriage because of the kids and now I’m remarried and doing the same thing again. I have two teenagers from my first marriage and a five year old now with my second wife. It’s ...
Views: 1585(6 votes) - Stepfamily Activity #2 - Make a Book to Illustrate - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn FieldingBeing a step-parent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in ...
Views: 1373 - Summer and Your Stepfamily - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie BlackwellStepfamilies are like snowflakes, no two are exactly the same. My stepkids live with me full time, but that isn't the case for many step-mothers. Many of you are probably spending a lot more time with your stepkids than you are used to doing. This post is dedicated to those of you that might ...
Views: 1850(3 votes) - The Oil of Life - by Submitted on Jul 01, 2009 from Gerald AnthonyOne day while taking a visit to the grocery store, I heard a customer in front of me say, “????? (phonetic- yo may yo yo? Pinyin- you mei you you?)” As I waited in line, I watched as the cashier understood this complex logic of using the same words of pronunciation to form a question and also ...
Views: 1721(3 votes) - And Baby Makes... - by Submitted on Jun 29, 2009 from Rebecca EvansEvery family is blended. Even when all the members are biologically linked, the addition of any new member requires special attention. And though new additions are mostly exciting times, blending can be an experience rich in mixed emotions, with joy and stress being at the top of the ...
Views: 1411 - Men and Depression - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomDear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My thirty-two year old stepson has hit some hard times and has had to move in with us. He lost his job, lost his condo in foreclosure, and his girlfriend broke up with him. I’m very worried about him, but my husband thinks he has to just tough it out. My stepson stays ...
Views: 1465(1 vote) - Electronic Free Activities For Families That Build Social Skills - by Submitted on Apr 29, 2009 from Judy WrightIf you are like most parents, grandparents, teachers today, you probably think that children are watching way too much television today. Not only are they sitting on their rear ends inside, when you can get them outside, they are playing video games on their cell-phones or other electronics. ...
Views: 1834(3 votes) - Families of the 21st Century - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2009 from Angie BlackwellFamilies of the 21st Century come in all shapes and sizes. Divorce, remarriage, parenting out-of-wedlock and a host of other variables have turned nuclear families into the exception rather than the norm. As little as a half-century ago, children were typically raised in homes with two ...
Views: 21851(5 votes) - The Cure for Walking on Egg Shells - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2009 from Terri BrittI was astonished recently to discover that my 15-year-old daughter is struggling more than I had thought with living in our new home. I got re-married last summer and my daughter Kolbi had seemed to be adjusting very well. She’s always smiling and cutting up with my new hubby, Charlie, and me. ...
Views: 1765(3 votes) - The Birds, the Bees, and Blended Families - by Submitted on Mar 20, 2009 from Diana Weiss-WisdomDear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, I’m living with my boyfriend who has two kids under eleven years old. What do I do if I don’t like his kids? They are lazy and watch a lot of T.V.-even during the daytime. They don’t pick up after themselves or have any chores. I feel like I’m the maid! When I talk ...
Views: 1678(1 vote) - What to Do When Your Stepkids Disrespect You, Part 2 - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2009 from James LehmanThis is part 2 of a two-part series by James Lehman, MSW on Blended Families. In this article, James discusses the importance of respectful behavior in a blended family, and how parents can achieve this from all the children in the family. Over the years, many parents in blended families have ...
Views: 2918(5 votes) - Stepfamily Activity #66: Word of the Week - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn FieldingBeing a stepparent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in ...
Views: 1735 - Stepfamily Activity #1: Think of 30 Things You Have in Common - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn FieldingBeing a step-parent is a daunting task, even when you get along with the kids. My stepdaughters live three hours away from me and visit every other weekend, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from being part of their lives! I sat down with them and we brainstormed 99 ways we could keep in ...
Views: 1555(1 vote) - “My Blended Family Won’t Blend--Help!” Part I - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2009 from James Lehman“I don’t know what to do anymore,” said Jill, stepmother to two teen girls and mom to one biological son, aged 10. “My stepdaughters don’t respect me—I’m the ‘evil stepmother’ to them—and pretty much ignore whatever I say. And my son is constantly telling me that my husband isn’t fair, and that ...
Views: 1953(3 votes) - For Stepmothers: Tough Lesson About Expectations - by Submitted on Feb 19, 2009 from Susan WisdomYears ago, I married into a stepfamily My husband had full time custody of his kids and a demanding career, so guess who had the job of raising the kids! Cathy was almost 8 and WILLFUL. Naïve and full of expectations, I looked forward to buying her sweet, feminine dresses and doing girl ...
Views: 1178 - A New Stepmom and Stepdaughter Find Healing for the Holidays - by Submitted on Jan 22, 2009 from Joan SarinSuzanne is the apple of her dad’s eye - 22, a beautiful, bright and successful architecture student who recently completed study in Europe for six months. Her parents’ divorce had been finalized shortly before she left, and she was dealing with it well - after all, she had a great ...
Views: 2571 - Five Steps Forward, Not Looking Back - by Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron DealFamily life is full of challenges and rewards. Stepfamily life is no different. Sarah knows just what I mean: “My first marriage to John was a battle from the day it started. I wanted romance and an intimate union; he wanted independence and freedom. He finally found it with another woman. ...
Views: 1195 - Cooperative Co-Parenting - by Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron DealBlended families are often torn apart by between-home conflicts while children are caught in the middle of warring parents. Strengthen your blended family by improving your co-parenting relationship. The goal of co-parenting (at a minimum) is to contain the anger and conflict expressed between ...
Views: 2866(2 votes) - How to Cook a Blended Family - by Submitted on Jan 15, 2009 from Ron DealWhether you realize it or not, you have a set of assumptions about how to cook your blended family. By that, I mean your approach to how your stepfamily ‘ought’ to come together. Brenda was cooking her family with a blender. “It happened again the other night,” she began. “My 14 ...
Views: 2189 - The Birds, The Bees, And Blended Families - by Submitted on Oct 27, 2008 from Diana Weiss-WisdomHow Can I Forgive him? On Blended Families Dear Dr. Weiss-Wisdom, My marriage of eighteen years ended three years ago because my husband had an affair with another woman. At first, I tried to forgive him and work the marriage out because we have a daughter together. But he lied again and I ...
Views: 1140 - What Parents Can Learn From Puppies - by Submitted on Oct 05, 2008 from Emily BouchardWhy is it that new puppy owners won't hesitate to sign up for obedience training? They know that it is the easiest and best way to get rid of unwanted behaviors and to establish clear rules and boundaries with their puppy. They attend classes or hire a trainer to learn techniques to make life ...
Views: 852 - Don't Like Your Step Kids? - by Submitted on Oct 05, 2008 from Emily BouchardOne challenge that many step parents face but few will admit is that they do not like one or more of their stepchildren. They love their partner, they love their kids, and they find themselves particularly challenged by the behaviors of their step kids. When a stepmom presents this problem to ...
Views: 2282 - Blended Families Can Use Erasers - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2008 from Dan and Rebecca SnellRIGHT NOW...CLOSE YOUR EYES FOR A MOMENT... PICTURE YOUR CHILDHOOD PAPERMATE 'PINK PEARL' ERASER... THAT SPECIAL SCENT IT HAD...EVEN HOW IT TASTED UPON NIBBLING... AND HOW MUCH YOU USED IT TO FIND YOUR 'FRESH START'. The famous childhood pink eraser. Yes ! We all know it well. Throughout ...
Views: 1349 - How Stepchildren Are Like Concrete Slabs - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Evelyn FieldingHow Stepchildren Are Like Concrete Slabs Imagine that you came home from work one day and discovered your spouse had poured a 20x30 concrete slab in the front yard. One corner of this slab sticks into the driveway; another corner took out a few hostas. And it’s a quadrilateral, not a ...
Views: 1528 - Blended Families Can Be Successful - by Submitted on Nov 07, 2007 from Judy WrightMany families today are blending members from past relationships. It would be easy to give up when faced with all the conflicting methods of parenting and discipline that come to a family who has joined forces together. As I was doing research for a recent book, I interviewed a young counselor ...
Views: 1119(2 votes) - Loving A Stepchild - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2007 from Judy WrightLoving your step- child can be both simple and hard. It is not enough for parents, step parents and extended family to feel a deep glow of love for the children in your circle of influence. You must convey that feeling into a message that is heard, felt and integrated by the child. Children ...
Views: 2386(2 votes)