Anger is part of life, as real and important as happiness, sadness and joy. But when anger spins out of control, we suffer. Work, relationships and health are a few of the areas where too much anger can hurt us. I would like to share three measurements that can help you quickly determine if you need to work on your anger.
Frequency – How often do you get angry each day? If the answer is “a lot,” you may have a problem. Domestic examples of frequent anger include constant fighting with your spouse or yelling at the kids. On the job, if many of your co-workers or customers seem to irritate you throughout the day, there is cause for concern.
Duration – How long does your anger last? Some people can brush off an anger-evoking event and go on with their day, leaving irritation behind, while others tend to dwell on things. Pent-up anger can have physical and emotional repercussions, including anxiety, depression, loss of sleep and elevated blood pressure.
Degree – How angry do you get? We have all seen anger ranging from mild irritation to furious rage. The problem arises when angry reactions are out of proportion to their cause. Underlying stress can lead to this. Remember the classic movie example from “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Upset over the misplaced deposit from his Savings and Loan, George Bailey returned home and yelled at his children about things that would normally have amounted to nothing.
Consider frequency, duration and degree as you self-reflect about your own anger issues or those of someone you care about. If you feel you need help, speak with someone about it. Often, a family member, close friend or minister can provide useful advice that will set you on the right path. If your concerns seem more serious or urgent, speak with your family doctor or a local mental health provider. You might consider online anger management classes. A site offering free classes is www.successwithlogan.com . There is help available, and you are absolutely not alone.
William Smith is a master’s level psychologist, certified by the State of Tennessee as a Social Counselor since 1989. He is the CEO of The Logan Group International, a leading provider of anger management courses for court and employers. To learn more about his company and what it offers, visit http://www.successwithlogan.com .