Learning to say no doesn't make you out to be a mean person or terrible, it just means learning to know your limits and how to pace yourself, so you can be a NICE PERSON!!!
No matter how wonderful you are sometimes other people will try to take advantage of your good nature.
They will push you, get you to do more than your fair share and keep asking you to do even more.
And worst of all -- often your efforts will be taken for granted. Unless you can say No, the situation will not change in fact it may get even more difficult.
That is unless you can say No to these unreasonable people because very often to win respect from people you have to sometimes say No!
Here are 4 great ways to stand up for you and say No:
1.Soften the No
Instead of shouting No at the person and creating an uncomfortable encounter you can instead soften the No by postponing your help.
For example --
•No, I am busy right now but I can help you in 40 minutes time
•No, I have other things to do at the moment
•Right now I do not have a free moment maybe later on
•I would love to help but not at this minute, try John
What you are doing is softening the No by saying not now rather than an outright No. This is a lot easier to do especially when dealing with people who intimidate you.
2.Negotiate
To deal with people who want your help but are slow to help you -- negotiate! When they want something from you, you have the power - use it!
Say you are happy to help on one condition -- that they help you immediately when you seek their help. They will usually agree because they have to! If they say No, again as above, postpone helping them if you can.
There are some people who view the world in terms of what is in it for them and the concerns of others are of secondary importance. With these people you are wasting your time talking about your needs.
For that reason you have to link your needs to their gains by negotiating - tell them they will get what they want IF you get what you want.
3.Say No When You Do Not Care About the Outcome
When you are flexing this new found ability to say No for the first time use every opportunity to get some practice e.g.
•In a restaurant, say no to the first table you are offered
•At home say No to coffee when everyone else says Yes, have tea
•In a store say yes to an offer of help but No to the product
What I mean is to say No when you are dealing with people whose approval is not that important to you. You will quickly learn through experience that it is not the end of the world if you say no and the other person is not pleased with you.
4.Say No to the Big Request and Yes to a Smaller One
Sometimes you are going to be asked to do more than your fair share. If you cannot avoid the job you may need to consider doing part of it.
A good way to handle these requests is to offer to do part of the job but not all of it. For example:
•I will clean 2 rooms if you do the other 3 rooms
•I can do 5 pages of the report as long as you give me the data
•If you start the project I will finish it
By standing up for yourself on small points you will gradually assert yourself more often on the big issues. The main thing is to get started today on winning back control of your interactions with anyone who pushes you too far.
Pace Yourself, so you are here for the Journey, not Just the ride
Empowering You to Optimal Health Julie Doherty N.D
Julie Doherty is a Fully Accredited Naturopathic & Massage Practitioner with the Australian Traditional Medicine Society Ltd.
Having completed Professional Qualifications in Naturopathic Medicine: Herbal Medicine: Homoeopathic, Nutritional Medicine: Holistic Massage Therapy: Body Work: & Natural Beauty Therapy. This has enabled Julie to follow her dream of supporting people to overcome their health issues & heal their body with the use of a combination of Naturopathic, Herbal, and Homoeopathic & Nutritional Medicines & Therapies to become well without causing further harm or complications
Julie is involved in supporting other health care professionals with treatment protocols for people who are on prescription medication, chemo therapy and other related health care procedures
Julie’s vision and passion has been & still is to assist each person to become well with the least invasive & most effective treatments. Whilst working with likeminded people.
Over the past 25 years, Julie Doherty has successfully treated & assisted people with various areas of ill health and disease from the common cold, skin ailments through to cancer.
Julie’s approach is to enable each person to have the best “Quality of life possible” whilst making your treatments effective, affordable and manageable incorporating these strategies into each person's everyday living. Respecting each person's culture and individual characteristics
Julie is a sought-after public speaker, lecturer & author providing community talks, facilitated & implementing professional related courses.
Julie is a published blogger and author who is recognized for her expert knowledge with Self Growth supporting & providing assistance with healthy life protocols.
Julie has been recognized by the Stanford Who's Who and the Continental Who's who for her dedication and recognition of excellence as a Health Care Practitioner, Executive, Entrepreneur and Professional standards of ethics.
What makes the work of Julie Doherty stand out? The successful testimonials of her clients becoming well both-young and old, from a wide range of disease and signs of ill health: It has been commented about her humanness, her humour, her willingness to reveal so much of herself, her belief and commitment to her industry and clients, and the easy-to-understand style of her communicating and her simplistic way of explaining treatments and programs to become well. Her understanding of the interconnectedness when there is a problem with health and it is out of balance that it is never just one thing, so addressing all related causes of the health problem/problems that she addresses with you.
To complement our healthy treatment programs Julie has formulated a Skin, Hair & Body Care Range that is good for you “Just For You”, not only will it have your skin looking great, healthy & vibrant. Your skin needs to be fed good healthy nutrients the same as your body