Yin and Yang of Mistakes

We all make mistakes!

From the garbage man to the All-Star second baseman, it is impossible to avoid them. Unfortunately, we tend to look at these mistakes in 2 different, but equally harmful
extremes.

Either we don't take responsibility or needlessly beat ourselves up over them. Both ways are cancerous to the mind, but there is a way to stop the disease growing in our Mental Vaults.

Life is a balancing act.

If we stay on either side of the spectrum for too long, we get ourselves out of whack. The past can repeat all its negativity over and over again if... we allow it.

On one side, many times we are unwilling to admit a mistake in the first place.

We diffuse responsibility to something outside of our control in order to lower the pain of failure. We tend to say things like “He made me do it” or “I didn’t have a choice.”

Yet if you are the one who did the action, you always have a choice and until we can see that, change is not possible.
Mistakes are there for a reason. Mistakes like writing the wrong address or missing that fly ball show us how to correct our actions so they don’t happen again. They are not failures but opportunities for growth.

Many times, though, we tend not to take responsibility for them which significantly hinders our ability for correction.
How can you correct something outside of your control? If you blame an external factor (i.e. another person, the weather) on your actions, the mistake will be made again. You will see people stuck in this mindset continue to make the same mistake, oblivious to their faults.

On the other side, though, sometimes we take full responsibility and that pain can destroy us emotionally. In this grasping mindset, we tend to constantly think about the mistake and how it affects our lives and the lives of others. We don’t let that pain of failure go and we tend to look at the mistake as a reflection of who we are deep inside.

This, too, is a harmful mindset.

We trap ourselves once again! When we attach to a past mistake as a reflection of our character it sets our minds down a dark path. Fear of ourselves starts to build and we start to believe we can never change, even if we tried. That mistake haunts us every day and the suffocation of the past leads to destructive self-doubt.

Doubt is the killer of all dreams.

This fear builds and builds until it intoxicates us. Then we do absolutely nothing because it doesn’t matter what we do, we are who we are and we cannot change.

But we can change! We can let go and not let our past actions dictate our present decisions to define our future. We have the choice. Mistakes are actually a fast pass to growth, it’s the law of accelerated failure. The faster and more you fail, the faster and more you learn! We do not have to be confined to a time so distant, we have the power now in this moment.

Whatever side you fall on the spectrum, to live in these extremes will harm you greatly in the long run. Either committing the same mistakes over without learning from them or committing no mistakes because fear prevents us from even trying.

Either way you are setting yourself up with an unfulfilled life. A life of regret and pain that nobody ever dreams of. A paradigm must be shifted.

To prevent the past from harming your future we need to look at mistakes with a certain perspective. We need to be honest enough to admit them yet aware enough to know we can choose better in the future.

The yin and yang of Mistakes!

To admit your flaws maybe one of the hardest things we humans have to do. We are exposing our weak points and opening up to intense vulnerability. It will hurt and the pain could cut deep. Yet, the ONLY way to begin to better yourself is to admit your flaws and what you need to do to improve.

This is just the beginning though. Admitting is one thing, taking the next step toward change is another.

If we don’t supplement the fact that we are able to choose better and that mistakes don’t define our worth, we can get down and depressed.

After we have seen our flaws and shortcomings, we must step outside the past and see a brighter future. To see that we are not our mistakes and we can choose different instantly enhances our state of mind!

These two fundamental mindsets are key to living a great life.

You can choose to let go of the negative consequences of the past, your mistakes are not you! They are vital bits of information showing you how to become stronger. We have the power to see beyond the past to a brighter tomorrow! We don’t have to be confined to who we were if we choose not to be.

Beating ourselves up does no good, we only are bringing more negativity to the world. Let go!

Honest enough to admit “failure”, but wise enough to know we can choose better, growth will always be present in our minds. The past is there for a good reason (to learn) but it is gone with the wind. A tiny fraction of a time no longer.

Don’t let it define you, you are worth much more than that!