Dr. Romance writes:
Normally, I recommend getting face to face as soon as possible, because you get so many clues, including pheromones, that you don’t get over phone, texting, email or video. However, these are not normal times, and we’re sheltering in place, so face to face is out, unless you want to risk getting within six feet of each other. Keep in mind that people can be infected and not know it, so be extra cautious. Dating online is the best option, because you can connect through video, phone, text and email. Face to face meeting should be put off until after sequestering is done. Keep in mind that, while most people will be genuine, some bad actors can fake things and mislead you.
Dr. Romance's tips for Meeting People on Non-Dating Sites:
How to find love during quarantine:
1. You need to find people, so join as many video conference meetings as you can manage. There are online book clubs, special interest groups, fan clubs, and classes. Join whatever strikes your fancy, something you’re interested in is a good idea. Make sure they are interactive, where you can see and connect with the other people. You can try anything and if you don’t like it, or there are no suitable people there, don’t go back after the first session.
2. If you can’t find a suitable group, start one on Facebook or other social media.
3. When someone says something interesting, comment on it. That’s how connections start.
4. Try several dating apps, until you find one you like, and plan on connecting with a lot of unsuitable people before you find a good one.
5. You can meet people anywhere: online at the bank, in the grocery store, at Starbucks. Even though you have masks on, strike up a conversation: “Have you ever tried this frozen dinner?” “ I see you bought …… How do you like it?” You won’t know anything about anyone unless you speak up and have a conversation.
6. If you walk or jog regularly, wave at people you see often. If you see someone interesting along the way, stop and begin a conversation
7. Focus on making friends. That’ s a lot less aggressive than looking for someone to date. And, if you make a few friends in addition to finding people to date, it’s a bonus.
For more on finding a new partner, Dr. Romance's Guide to Finding Love Today
For low-cost phone counseling, email me at tina@tinatessina.com
Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.