Who Can I Trust?
I am fairly certain that we all want someone who we can place our trust in. The only question is “Who is that someone going to be?” Who are you going to place your trust in? If the answer is yourself then you are going to be frequently disappointed. If you answer is your spouse or significant other, then you will still be frequently disappointed and face the possibility of devastation. If your answer is God, I question you. I question, not judge, but question because there are few who truly understand what it really means to trust in God. This failure to understand has led to a mass population of church-goers who claim to trust in God but really have a “death-grip” on everything in their lives trying to control their whole existence.
Welcome to article/blog #2 in this series. If you haven’t read #1 yet I encourage you to read it before you dive into this one.
I have heard the phrase “The only one we can trust is ourselves” come out of many-a-mouths and it’s laughable every time. I’m not trying to be rude but the idea that we can trust ourselves is ridiculous. Take a moment and consider your life. How many times have you been proven trust worthy to yourself? Think about all of the failures, poor decisions and all the times you have caused pain to people you love and care about. How many times have you let yourself down? Addiction is a classic example of how untrustworthy we are. There is no one out there who enjoys their addictions. Everyone tries to quit the destructive behavior but the percentages of those who are successful are very low. Only 2.5% of smokers successfully quit every year and only 5% of alcoholics, drug addicts and compulsive gamblers successfully quit. These are only some of the obvious addictions but there are many addictions and the failure rate is the same. You can’t trust yourself plain and simple. If you could then it would mean that you could overcome the kingdom of Satan by yourself without help and nullify the need for salvation. That’s a problem for followers of Jesus.
Many of us enter into marriage placing our trust in our spouse’s and live out the life of the marriage with frequent disappointment and hurt. Just think about it. Considering how many times you have let yourself down, how in the world do you expect to be able to hold your spouse’s trust? I’ll just let you reflect on this for yourselves. How many times has your spouse broken trust? How many times have they shattered your hope? How many times has the phrase “This is the last time” turned out to be a lie? On top of that, the 80% infidelity rate is too big to ignore and most people recognize that possibility prior to marriage, thus damaging their trust some right from the start. How many times has your trust been damaged by lies of omission?
You may be recognizing by now how greatly trust has failed in your life in the people you’re supposed to know the best being your spouse and yourself. Considering that revelation, it would be a fruitless endeavor to try and place your trust in any other relationship.
But what does God say?
“Trust ye not in a friend, put ye not confidence in a guide: keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lieth in thy bosom.” Micah 7:5 (KJV)
If you look at the Hebrew meaning of “friend” you will see that it covers everyone. So what is the answer?
“Therefore I will look unto the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me.” Micah 7:7 (KJV)
We are going to talk about trust later but I want to encourage you some now. The only one we can successfully place our trust in is God. As that relates to us and our spouses, as we begin to allow God to transform who we are we begin to see His fruit manifested in our lives. That is what we place our trust in. We don’t place our trust in our spouses we place our trust in the fruit and righteousness of God reflected through our spouses as He transforms them from the inside out. And I will leave you with a challenge. I challenge you to ask God to teach you about transformation, intimacy and true relationship with Him every single day. Then see what happens. God bless.
Jesse Birkey
Author of “Marriage What’s The Point?”
www.marriagewhatsthepoint.com
The son of a pastor, Jesse grew up in the church with an intellectual knowledge of God. As a teenager he faced the same struggles as everyone else especially in the area of acceptance. He married his school sweetheart, made a career as a firefighter/paramedic and had two beautiful children. His life was enviable and he found security in what he had until God allowed his most treasured relationship, his marriage, to be tested. The veil was pulled back and he was able to see himself as he was "poor, blind and naked". He came to the revelation that he needed a relationship with God and not a religion. He made a choice to die to himself, sacrificing his own selfish desires and learned to walk in obedience to God. God restored his marriage, but even more started him on a journey of understanding true love and intimacy. God has given Jesse a ministry of setting the captives free through Jesus Christ. He uses his website, www.marriagewhatsthepoint.com, as an outreach for the hurting and broken.
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