The common view of love is one of fleeting, unpredictable passion. To most, love is something that has to "be there." It's a feeling that strikes you, and if you don't feel it, then you (and your significant other) are out of luck. After all, you have to fall in love with someone to love them, right?
Nothing could be farther from the truth. This viewpoint is simply a delusion. If you aren't in control of your life, then your best hope is that love will choose you. If you are in control, then you can make the choice to love.
The next question is, how does someone go about intentionally creating love? By choosing it. Even if you've fallen out of love with someone, you can do this.
Consciously appreciate them. Understand them. Listen, with your complete self, to what they have to say. Many problems in relationships would dissolve if each party would just listen. When that happens, all conflict, all confrontation, disappears. Create memorable moments with them.
Love is a constantly evolving process. Never ask yourself if you love someone, simply identify what you want to feel, and actively pursue it. Be in flow with that person and their emotions. Share deeply with them secrets that you don't share with anyone else. This can create an incredible bond.
We can all fall out of love with people at times. It's a fairly common occurrence in today's fast paced society. We lose sight of building connections with the myriad of things we have to do each day. Stress and anxiety are the antithesis of love.
Love is relaxed, calm, and understanding. Ask yourself if you act that way around the person you used to love. It's very possible that you are confrontational and hostile instead. Actively choose to behave better, and you'll find that your emotions will follow.
It's never too late to choose to love.
Fred Tracy runs a personal development website where he blogs about his experiences and challenges his readers to consciously grow. Happiness, finances, and inner peace are some of his favorite topics.